Mother in law spending

[Starfish125]

Hi just wanted to know if anyone has advice or experience and how to deal with this very first world problem that I have!

Basically my OH mum is lovely - absolutely lovely can't really fault her for much. However, she has a spending habit, she gets pleasure from buying stuff online/QVC etc and I mean brand new designer clothes make up bags etc you name it she has it. She doesn't even know what she's got, it's definitely an addiction of some sort but saying that she's not in debt so technically it's no problem. However, when it comes to Christmas and birthdays.(Christmas especially) she goes WAY overboard. We now have 3 children and the amount of stuff she gets them gives me a headache. I get a lot of anxiety regarding 'clutter' and a minimalist house is what we have. I've dropped hints before and she says she won't spend much but she doesn't keep her word and I honestly can't take it this year due to us just having had our third child, we have too much as it is. How do I get her to calm it down? Or any solution to the issue.

You have my sympathy OP. My MIL used to be like this. Literal bin bags full of God knows what whenever we went to see her. Holiday souvenirs (she'd do a holiday almost every month!) tat from the pound shop, random clothes, things she'd knitted from decades old magazines, empty biscuit tins because they had a pretty pattern, cuddly toys. You name it, she bought it, in triplicate.

Then we had DC 😂I've honestly never seen so much stuff.

We tried saying to keep the money and have an extra holiday. We tried asking for specific things we actually wanted in the hope we'd just get that instead of 50 £1 items. Nothing worked.

For our things we used to just to take straight to the charity shop. But when the DC wanted to keep it all it was hard. We kept more than we wanted, and tried to winnow it down by stealth once they got bored with things.

She can't get out to the shops anymore and doesn't do anything online so it's stopped now.

You could give her a list and save yourself a fortune at Christmas!

Or ask her to contribute to the kids' savings instead.
Or ask that she limit presents to 2 per child? Maybe give a size limit do you don't end up with massive things you can't house.
Or sell whatever you don't have room for after Christmas and put the money in the kids' savings accounts.

Sone people do just love to shop - it's their hobby.

Thank you for your replies - my partner says he thinks she does it as it's the only part of her life she can control as my FIL is pretty rubbish with money yet holds all the cards basically.

I think I might give her a list and see how it goes. My 9 year old has suddenly started an expensive taste in branded clothes, JD is her favourite shop and two items there cost like £100 so I might give her a list of clothes she wants 😂