Sorry this is long. Short version is - not sure if anyone else's child is / was like this or if it's unusual. No experience of preschoolers and first child! Just looking for some advice or reassurance from other mums...
Long version is: My DS is just turned 3. He has always been a "livewire" - bags of energy, and incredibly strong-willed from the moment he could move around. He is exhausting to look after. He's gorgeous and has always been generally happy and loving life but just so so SO energetic and a runner. Will run into the road unless he wears a backpack with a lead in, never listens, will hurl himself off a everything high and dangerous. Even my friend who's a very experienced nanny said 'bloody hell you must be knackered' after she spent just an hour with us.
Anyway last couple of weeks he seems to have become even more of a challenge - not sure if its a phase, his age or a growth spurt or something else. His tantrums have become more frequent and harder to quell - before a little validation and soothing did the trick. Now he's tantrumming on the floor and nothing soothes him.
He's also started doing that sort of fake crying / whining thing a lot. He seems generally miserable. It's as if he's over tired but he is still sleeping ok - usually through the night 11 hours (one benefit if having such an energetic child is that he sleeps!) He also still naps most days for an hour or so, so I don't think it can be tiredness but that's how it comes across in terms of the behaviour.
I've read all the books and try to follow the advice in "How to Talk so Little Kids Will Listen" etc, but nothings helping. He's becoming really defiant, just shouting 'no' a lot, or deliberately doing things he knows he shouldn't. He is such a bolter - last week I was running around airport security trying to catch him after he sprinted away when going through the scanner. Another mum recently asked 'don't you trust him' (upon seeing the backpack with a lead) and I said well actually not really!
I know he's 3 but I'm not sure how much is normal. We had a visitor the other day (a relative, very old fashioned who probably thinks children should be seen and not heard). He scratched their hand with a piece of Lego - not meaning to hurt them I don't think just curious about the mark it left - and I took the Lego away saying 'I'm worried in case it hurts X again' and this led to a massive meltdown and DS trying to prise the Lego piece back off me and pulling my hair. Visitor was not impressed and I felt very judged. (I know I need to let that one go).
DS is potty trained and according to his nursery he's very bright and is language is really good - speaking in extended sentences etc so I don't think it's frustration on that front - he is able to communicate well.
Getting him to sleep has become an issue too - lots of resistance. I don't know whether to drop the nap but he did skip it recently and he was then unbearable and obviously beyond exhausted plus he seems to need a nap most days. I do still have him sleeping in a cot (a very large bed sized one but still with the sides up) because he will be up and down and running about all night otherwise.
I know it's quite old to be in the cot bed and just turned 3 but honestly until 3 weeks ago he went down like a dream and he sleeps all night so I thought let's not change it if we don't need to. Also we just did potty training (which he smashed in 2 days) and changed rooms at nursery so I was worried about too many changes.
I was thinking about redecorating his room and making it more of a big boys room rather then a nursery and maybe taking the side of the bed down at the same time as I thought it might encourage him to enjoy being in there. But he never does quiet time or solo play - he is just so full on.
Anyway I'm just a bit overwhelmed with it right now and seeking wisdom on here. I know I only have one child and probably a lot of people would wonder how I can find it so hard. I just want my son to feel happy and I'm also scared that he might be one a really challenging older child.