I feel a bit down about my birthday.

[EarlofShrewsbury]

I'm 40 this week. I've booked the day off so we could go out for the day.

When I was 18 the car broke down and I missed my own party. When I was 21 I was in an abusive relationship so it was a non event. When I was 30 I was pregnant with hyperemesis.

I really wanted to have a nice 40th.

I drive for a living and my car has just needed quite a bit spent on it to keep it on the road and I've had to use my birthday money.

We have disabled DC and DP is a carer and doesn't earn so all money goes in one pot, we discuss all special purchases so I know I won't be getting a nice surprise.

So I'll be sat at home doing nothing now.

Anyone got any ideas of free things I can do to make it nice?

I know these things happen and it is what it is but I feel a bit sad.

Could you get a take away and a relatively cheap cake or make cake with DC? Even just decorating a shop bought cake yourself can make it special. Or float the idea of DP making a buffet tea like a little party? Suggest to your DP that the kids help make you a birthday card? My DH would not want to organise something for my birthday in case he got it wrong so he would wait for some helpful suggestions or pointers from me. I’m 40 next year and I know that we won’t be able to afford to go away but I would be happy with putting it off to a later time when we are more comfortable. I hope you have a lovely birthday x

Has your DH not got any ideas given he knows your area and interests?

A drive out into the countryside or find a beach and take a picnic. Go to the supermarket as soon as it opens and get some treats: quality cheeses, olives, ripe tomatoes, some fruit and some rustic bread. Some treats for the DC. Take a small bottle of wine for you assuming DP will drive.

Find a nice spot that is a bit quiet away from roads and hustle. Set up a small table if you have one. It doesn’t have to be fancy, throw a sheet over it, take a couple of chairs. Or a blanket and some large cushions or pillows.

We did this many years when we were watching funds and had very small DC’s. We pointed the car West and headed out eventually driving past Brecon into some rolling farmland halfway to the sea. We parked on some open land adjacent to a wide shallow stream where the kids could play safely all day. We saw no cars all day, just the farmer went past a couple of times on his tractor, seemingly sorry for disturbing us.

We still talk about that day. The simplicity and slowing down if it all. Memories are more important than goods.

As @FatherJoseFernandez has said, a nice cake would be lovely and cakes like to go on picnics too.

I second what Chatillon says. A picnic is a lovely idea. We had some lovely times doing this when our children were younger. You can take a small birthday cake with you.

What do you feel like doing? If you want to sleep, have some wine, watch your fav show, that's ok too

Happy birthday in advance @EarlofShrewsbury 💐

Happy Birthday! At 40 you can still look forward to many more birthdays.

A picnic sounds great, hope the weather will be kind to you. I'd enjoy a trip to the seaside and eat fish and chips there.

I did forget to wish you a happy birthday @EarlofShrewsbury
I hope you and your DP find something to do that results in a happy day of memories for you.

The DC suggested using my Blists Hill annual pass and I think we are going to do that and borrow money for fuel and lunch from my parents.

I only have it because we went last year and it was cheaper to get a year ticket than a day one.

Thanks for the suggestions, I was just having a wobble but I'm OK now.

You bounce back well...!

Love a day at Blist Hill !

They have celebrations at Xmas too

Happy birthday 🎂

Have a look in your area for free things to do

There are sometimes fetes, museums, carnivals, family days in the parks, car boot sales, cinema