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Original poster

Can a child get better at sports?

40 replies

Lulli · 16/07/2023 10:22

DD (5.5 yo) has been doing lots of sporty classes since she was very little (tennis, playball, gymnastics etc). She seemed to be doing ok, not better or worse than other children of her age, but now after 2 years of gymnastics I can see she's slightly falling behind. Some of the children in her class are really going for it, trying different things whilst she is cautiously tagging along.

She also had her sports day at her prep school a month ago and I can see some girls were so competitive and really trying hard whilst she was just happy to have a go. She did manage to come third in the final race and I can see it boosted her confidence. But I can see now she's older she does not have a natural talent for it, although she does love her PE classes.

Academically she is doing very well and is very inquisitive, she's also musical, so we don't want to push her hard at sports but I'd like her to do better for her own confidence.

Can a child get better at sports?

OP posts:
RicksTheHunk · 16/07/2023 10:37

So what if she doesn’t? She sounds perfectly happy as she is.

Thingamebobwotsit · 16/07/2023 10:43

It doesn't matter one way or another. But the reality is school/childhood sports activities are one big sausage machine and they don't suit everyone. I hated any form of organised sport but thrived in those that weren't in mainstream education or out of school clubs. Give her time and let her try all sorts of things. She will find her tribe and niche. The main thing is she learns to love being fit and healthy... the rest doesn't matter.

LizBennet · 16/07/2023 10:45

Of course, anyone can get better at anything with practice.
Like anything though it should never be forced, I was made to play sports as a child (very sporty dad) and I was neither a natural nor enjoyed it.

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CurlewKate · 16/07/2023 14:51

She's having fun. She's trying. She's 5. Don't buy into the prep school
Competitive thing.

Clymene · 16/07/2023 15:02

She's FIVE

LobsterCrab · 16/07/2023 15:07

It's sometimes about finding the right sport. My DD never shone at dance or gymnastics when she was younger because she is tall and the best gymnasts tended to be smaller and more compact. Now she plays netball and her height is a definite advantage!

eiderdownlily · 16/07/2023 15:08

Does she do recreational gymnastics at that age or is she in development classes? The children who were the best at that age had natural talent, and/or worked on strength and flexibility outside of classes, or did extra classes or private lessons. Or something related, and useful, like dance.

She's only 5.5 though and sounds like she does a lot of different things rather than concentrating on one hobby. I wouldn't worry.

x2boys · 16/07/2023 15:18

Just leave her be let her enjoy it ,does it matter if she's not particularly sporty at least she's active🙄

Jujubes5 · 16/07/2023 15:23

Is she 5 1/2 years old or am I missing something.
That's a lot of activities if she is only 5.5 - maybe she wants to sit at home and watch tv or play with dolls?

reluctantbrit · 16/07/2023 15:42

I would ensure she is active with something she likes and ideally where there is no competition vipe.

DD did gymnastics but it became clear fast that the club was only interested in pushing the children good enough for their competition group. So we stopped and started first horse riding and now martial arts. She also swam, first normal lessons and then life saver lessons instead of club swimming.

DD is defintiely better in non-team sports and regardless of practice is really bad with a ball.

I think too many clubs are pushing towards grades, competition instead of having a good recreational arm.

UsingChangeofName · 16/07/2023 15:47

She's FIVE.
She's doing fine (well, far too much, possibly).

To directly answer your question - Of course. If you want to get better at anything, you almost always can, by practising. However, whilst your dd is getting better, so will her peers, so - even if she were behind, which clearly she isn't - her getting better wouldn't necessarily close a gap.

Some people are naturally faster than others, or stronger, or better at balance or hand / eye co-ordination, in the same way some seem to have a 'musical ear' or an 'eye for colour', or the sort of brain that just knows how to spell words, or the sort of memory that retains facts, or the type of charm or personality that easily chats to people. When she gets older, you'll begin to see where her natural talents are strongest.

DPotter · 16/07/2023 16:03

I was useless at school team sports, loved the hockey and tennis but basically useless. But I played badminton 3 times a week as a teenager, started yoga at 15 and became a T'ai Chi instructor in my 40s. As long as she's active and having fun, she's fine. Just make sure she can swim and is water confident.

toochesterdraws · 16/07/2023 16:11

Please don't push her into it, and please don't do or say anything that could give her the impression that you are disappointed in her progress.

Fifthtimelucky · 16/07/2023 16:21

She sounds a bit like one of my daughters. She enjoyed sport but wasn't in the least bit competitive.

I remember the first time I saw her in a race at sports day for her nursery. She ran along happily holding her best friends' hands. The following year, when she was in reception, she was running well in her race until her hat fell off. She stopped and went back to pick it up!

She's now 25 and still enjoys sport but still doesn't like the competitive side.

UpUpUpU · 16/07/2023 16:26

My son is just 5 last week. He’s been going to a football club for 6 months and loves it! However, he has no idea what is going on and is absolutely useless!

he’s been having swimming lessons since a baby. He is only just in stage 2 and really not a natural born swimmer!

however, he has been able to ride a bike for years and can easily cycle 20 miles and loves a good downhill mountain bike track!

They are all different with different talents. It’s the fun and health aspect that matters

DinnaeFashYersel · 16/07/2023 16:41

As long as she is happy and enjoying it it doesn't matter.

Keep trying new things till she finds the right thing for her.

Original poster
Lulli · 16/07/2023 17:53

Thank you everyone for your advice.

To clarify she stopped tennis last year as she didn't really know what was going on so we thought she should be doing something that she is interested in. Same with playball, we stopped more than a year ago. So apart from PE at school twice a week she only does recreation gymnastics.

She doesn't ride a bike yet as we didn't give her one. She had a balance bike at 3 but never took an interest in it. Took her a while to get confident on the scooter, but she's fine now.

She is water confident, just about to start swimming. She enjoys it very much.

OP posts:
Ohhelpicantthinkofaname · 16/07/2023 18:43

So she was like 3/4 when she did tennis? How good did you expect her to be?

shes 5, just let her be little. Let her try things she enjoys, she may develop an aptitude for them, she may not, but so long as she enjoys it then who cares.

DelurkingAJ · 16/07/2023 18:49

If she wants to herself then absolutely.

DS1 at the end of Y2 (so 7) was ‘working towards’ for gross motor skills. However, he discovered cricket, spent the entirety of lockdown bowling against a wall in the garden and dropping a ball from under his chin to hit it (I reckon he was out there an average of two hours a day) and he’s currently on the County Pathway.

Diddykong · 16/07/2023 18:54

Dd9 is shit at sport. I think she's probably dyspraxic. Last at everything. But she loves dancing and she's pretty good at swimming (not fast enough for races but does well in class). As a child who hated PE and sports day with a passion I'm keen for her to develop a love of fitness regardless where she finds it, so we encourage her to try lots of things. She's good at single sports like climbing for example. I want to get her to try fencing.

She has improved a bit in some things but I'm not holding out any hope she'll be an Olympian but enjoying fitness is so much more important than winning.

MrsTerryPratchett · 16/07/2023 18:54

For 99.99% of people, sport is about keeping fit, being social and fun. Only a minuscule number of people compete competitively as a primary goal. Girls tend to fall off earlier than boys as well, partly because competitive team sports are emphasised.

Try different sports. My DD loved non-team sports like climbing and martial arts. Hated gym, dancing, all team sports. Being good isn't the point, being fit for life is.

Singleandproud · 16/07/2023 18:55

I think you are expecting far too much at her age.

Sport at that age should be about learning to use your body, coordination and proprioception.

Yes, there will be some children who are naturally more flexible and will fly at things like gymnastics and ballet and others that do 5 classes a week but actual skills can absolutely be learnt and improved.

I think you would benefit from looking into children's physical development and helping her develop age appropriate skills like throwing and catching different size balls and Frisbees.

DD didn't start swimming lessons properly until she was 8, I took her regularly and she could swim, just needed help with proper technique. Because she was older and her gross motor skills were well developed she flew through the stages and swam a mile in the swim schools distance swimming week just 6 months after starting lessons.

DD has dipped in and out of various sports, taking transferable skills with her as she goes allowing her to pick up the new sport quite quickly.

Do you actually want a competitive child, do you understand the family commitment that requires even at the beginning, training 5 x nights a week, early morning sessions, weekends spent at competitions and galas across the county or even further, the expense of sports gear, travelling and hotels?

PuttingDownRoots · 16/07/2023 19:06

My 12yo has never been "sporty". She tried... but never got far. Endless energy so quite good over long distances running but doesn't enjoy that.

We recently discovered shes a natural at climbing. We always knew she could climb... but never realised she's good at technical stuff. She was "spotted" on her first trip to a proper climbing wall on an introductory session.

All kids have different talents!

ErrolTheDragon · 16/07/2023 19:12

They're all different and she's very little.
she was just happy to have a go
That's fine.
The main thing is to let her try different activities as she grows up, see what she enjoys. There are just one or two things which really are 'life skills' - learning to ride a bike is easier when they're young, and something you can do as a family when she's a bit bigger. And even moreso swimming, as that unlocks so many other possibilities for watersports. These again are something that can be enjoyed as a family and may be more appealing if someone is active but not 'sporty' or into team games.... but that's a few years down the road.

YukoandHiro · 16/07/2023 19:15

Never has a thread made me happier to be state educating my children.
Christ alive, she's 5! And she's happy. Why is there any other question at all?!

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