Self-Love when busy

[LauraBHH]

I was chatting with a friend and we were discussing that when you're a busy woman with lots of responsibilities, dedicating time to self-care and self-love somehow feels like a waste of time/ selfish/ indulgent.

Does anyone else feel like that?
Do you think women feel like that more than men?

I think (some) women enjoy being a bit martyrish and insisting that their life is so busy they can't possibly find time to read a book, go for a walk, meditate or whatever. I am sure someone will come along and say they really can't allocate any time to themselves because they've got a long commute, very important career, DC with extra curricular activities that need to be ferried everywhere, elderly DPs to care for, massive garden, pets etc etc ... but many lifestyle choices are just that .. choices.
I accept that in some cases people are genuinely 'busy' but there is almost a sense of importance being expressed when people say they are 'busy'.
In my circle everyone seems to say 'I'm so busy' as if it's a badge of honour .. or maybe to avoid being asked to do something for someone else. People often say to me 'you have such a busy lifestyle' ... I absolutely don't, spend hours on Mumsnet and lazing around but for some reason I give the impression of being 'busy' .

I try to at least take a minute or two to stop thinking, get in the garden, take deep breaths and stare at the sky. In winter I sit in the dark with a candle instead. But it can be hard to get my brain to stop.