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Original poster

How do your 13 year old boys entertain themselves?

34 replies

JarOfRocks · 13/07/2023 21:31

Outside of school my 13 year old son has several sports clubs that he attends each week and a music lesson, but other than that all he wants to do is play FIFA and mess about on his phone. I know this is normal, but it seems to result in bad behaviour for him personally so I really want to reduce the screen time. But what to replace it with? He's signed up for a lot of activities, but that's just an hour at a time. What do your sons do for the rest of the time, outside of school and organised activities?

OP posts:

Allthescreens · 13/07/2023 21:40

I'm interested to see the responses here.

I have a 14 year old DS who is much as you describe. He does football, debate club, Scouts, but outside of that tends to veer towards screens. He has started to earn some money by gardening for my parents, who no longer can & he will often do that. At 12-13 he did more playing football in the Garden, trampoline, model railway, board games etc.

Also have a 12 year old (and a 9 year old) but he is very young for his age due to autism. Still happy to go to park/swimming after school, junk modelling, Lego, games, train track (pretends it's a rollercoaster). Much like the 9-year old.

illiterato · 13/07/2023 21:42

Yep- this is the problem- too much childhood on the end of childhood. Mine much the same. He practices cricket quite a lot and will find other stuff if forced ( read, go for a run, bake ( badly)) so I just limit screens and he’s forced to find something .

illiterato · 13/07/2023 21:44

He’d actually do well with a PT job for a few hours a week as he’s a hard worker and sensible so could easily do clearing tables/ kitchen work etc but no one will employ a 13 year old round here.

Interested in this thread?

Then you might like threads about these subjects:

13 year olds Families

whichwayiwonder · 13/07/2023 21:47

Play on his skateboard, walk the dog, go for a run, make supper, listen to /practice music. At least they're things for him to do if I can get him away from a screen. Easier said than done, without an argument anyway.

illiterato · 13/07/2023 21:50

Oh yeah- ds does technically play the guitar but I don’t see much evidence of it.

gogomoto · 13/07/2023 21:52

At that age my DD's did competitive sports, music and socialised a fair amount through church, dd2 also did plenty of "studying" from about 15 which I since found out was not studying!!! Be wary if your youngster's suddenly are staying late "at school" to study us all I can say . (She's a well adjusted adult thankfully now)

Catabogus · 13/07/2023 21:56

A year younger here so not sure how helpful this is - but DS reads books, plays the piano, still does Lego, sketches, listens to music, rides his bike or hangs around the kitchen saying “I’m staaaaaarving” a lot.

LadyTemperance · 13/07/2023 21:57

Mine is the same as yours. He has friends who live near one another and they do knock about together, cycle round the park etc. That’s ok at 13 but the group of post gcse kids who do this are starting to cause trouble. On the one hand I wish he was socialising, getting fresh air etc on the other I’m glad I won’t be reading on Facebook about him throwing eggs, spraying graffiti etc.
Then there’s another group from his year who I know were drinking vodka in the park in y7 so…

DutchCowgirl · 13/07/2023 21:58

My son is practicing basketball stunts in the garden most of the day. The sound of the ball on the terrace is driving me crazy . But at least he is not behind a screen… and the neighbors haven’t come around to complain (yet).
And he plays the same 3 songs he likes on his keyboard the rest of the day…
And he follows his classmates around on snapchat. He can tell me exactly where everybody went to today, he is just not having any real contact with them.

It is a difficult age I have been told. Too old for the playground and too young for a job.

MissyB1 · 13/07/2023 22:02

Ds is 14, he does a few sports clubs, kicks his football a lot in the street, lifts weights in his bedroom, chats endlessly to his mates on his phone, and scrolls endlessly too!

sheeplikessleep · 13/07/2023 22:04

Football in garden
Gaming
Cooking
But most of the time he wants dropping off to see his friends down the park / on bikes / for a splash in local stream … he’ll be out every day over the summer

illiterato · 13/07/2023 22:05

Thing is teenage life is just less time consuming for them. When I was 13 and decided I really wanted to listen to Papa don’t Preach I had to get on my bike, go to my friend’s house, borrow her Madonna cassette, cycle home, record it on my dual deck ghetto blaster ( first find sellotape to make cassette recordable). Overcome unwinding tape crisis. Return cassette to mate. Settle down to listen while creating artsy insert with berol fine liners.

Now it’s just open Spotify, press play.

I feel like despite both dc having a lot on out of school there’s still a lot of weekend time where they’re just begging for Xbox.

Squidlette · 13/07/2023 22:08

Xbox. Phone. Has no friends outside school, even though he does martial art and cadets. He has no interest in fitness and is painfully thin. I worry about him.

But then, the other, younger, dc wants to go out and wander further afield with mates whose parents don't seem that bothered about smackheads round the park and the county lines issues round here. I worry about her.

I was pretty much a shut in at that age though. Other kids wanted to fight me or take the piss because I was a bit weird, so it was safer staying in. As an adult, you would not know me as that kid. Sociable and extrovert, because at 15 or 16 I became comfortable with who I was. I have to remember that when I'm tempted to tell dc1 to leave his room more.

BakewellGin1 · 13/07/2023 22:13

DS 14....
Football training twice a week
Football match on Sunday mornings
Goes to support local football team when they play at home a few Saturdays a month
PlayStation Online with mates
Meets friends during school holidays/light nights for a kick about, walk out to the beach, local sports village
Watches films on Netflix/Prime etc
Sees his girlfriend
Phone scrolling

sunshineandshowers40 · 13/07/2023 22:13

2 early teen boys:

PS4/Ps5
X box
Phone
Martial arts
Football in the garden
Out with friends ( not often as they don't really have anything to do)
Oldest will cook
One plays the guitar (one lesson a week)

TokyoSushi · 13/07/2023 22:19

DS almost 13

Xbox
Phone
Football training & matches
Out with friends on bikes quite a lot
TV/Netflix etc

MortgageConundrum · 13/07/2023 22:27

You’re all so much more grown up than I am - I read the title and sniggered to myself!

Awrite · 13/07/2023 22:58

Your boys all do so much more than mine. He never returned to his pre-covid activities.

So, he games, plays football in the garden with his Dad or by himself and he spends time with his sister.

If forced he will come out with us as a family. After much moaning though.

He seems to be a home boy. Doing well at school and seems happy enough.

cyncope · 13/07/2023 23:02

Mostly goes out on his bike to the park/skate park with mates.
Or on our trampoline.
Listens to a lot of podcasts.

Motivationtoaddress · 13/07/2023 23:23

Ds is 13 but has a 10 year old sister and 17 year old brother. Between them they generally find something to do. At the moment they're playing a lot of tennis. We have a net on the drive way and we've joined the local tennis club so they go down there to play.

Today he has worked with his Grandad putting up some fencing, read some manga, played some Xbox, practiced cricket with his sister and done Duolingo. Yesterday he made brownies with his brother and played tennis and tomorrow' he's planning on a haircut and has cricket training.