Are people genuine when they say "you will be a great mum"

[TomorrowToday]

I'm pregnant and heard that from a few people.

Are they genuine or is it what you say?

If they know you they are probably genuine! They like you and think you are great, and they think that you will be a great mom too.

Just something you say. The vast majority of us are good enough parents, so it’s very likely true.

A woman at work has had multiple angry outbursts at other colleagues, known for crying at her desk every now and then, has many other personal problems, just not stable. She is only about 22 so will prob grow out of some of this. She said she wanted a baby and everyone said that she’d be a great mum. I kept my mouth shut. Think people were thinking ‘she’ll grow up if she’s had a kid’ - I hope she does for the potential baby’s sake.

My point being - no, it’s not always an honestly held belief, but that doesn’t have much bearing on whether it would be true or not.

That isn't the sort of thing I would say if I didn't mean it, so think they are probably genuine

I just say it to whoever tells me there pregnant. Don't know what else to say😂

Something you say. no one knows if they will be a great mum (or even a good enough mum) until they become one.

I see it a lot on Mumsnet as well. Someone posts something and on the basis of knowing 6 lines of information about their life, they get a "you sound like a great mum" response.

In my experience it is the sort of thing said to someone who got pregnant young or accidentally as a comfort especially if they will be a single parent.

There are also people who say it because they mean it.

No, it’s just gushy nonsense. Doesn’t mean you won’t, though.

Ditto

Just something I say. I sort of mean it as I tend to think most people will be a good enough mum.

It's really on said to someone pregnant for the first time so just a bit of reassurance.

Hi @TomorrowToday if i've ever said that to anyone i genuinely meant it.
Congratulations on your pregnancy xx

When your baby is born, it will think you are great. To your baby, you will be the greatest mum in the world and no other mother could compare. So unless you deliberately neglect your baby or put it in danger, you will be a great mum.
I think a lot of first time/pregnant mums need to hear that because there are all these worries about not knowing what to do and not being good enough. But most mums are doing just great which is probably why a lot of people say it.

https://www.tiktok.com/@bluey/video/7168920406559067398?lang=en

I would find it hideously patronising. So nice of people to evaluate how effective a parent they think I will be and tell me their verdict, unsolicited.
No-one has ever said it to me though so maybe I’m just bitter 😅

I’m sure they do mean it. I think it generally means something like they think your are a nice and caring person and can imagine you as a loving mum.

I'd never say it, it's completely impossible to know about yourself in advance never mind about anyone else

Believe if you like but it's meaningless

Also I'd be a little worried about the effect on the mental health of a woman who's told she'll be a great mum then struggles, just seems like a possible trigger for PND

I'd say it to someone who needed a confidence boost and who was appearing unsure of their parenting ability.