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I don't know how to change my life

4 replies

Icanbuymyselfflowers22 · 08/07/2023 17:09

I'm desperately unhappy with my life. I am today spending my tenth day alone. I am off sick from a job I don't like due to chronic pain which I'm not getting any help with. I feel so lonely. Already on antidepressants and in counselling.

OP posts:
SoWhatEh · 08/07/2023 17:15

How long have you been on meds and had counselling? They are a really good start but will take time.

Do you have any help with your sleep? Pain can cause sleeplessness and exhaustion always makes things worse. Have you tried taking an old style antihistamine to make you drowsy?

What about pain management? Could it be eased by physio? Have you had proper medical advice about non-addictive painkillers to reduce it?

Being alone for too long is very challenging. Even being alongside others is better than beingin total isolation. Bus and train rides, coffee in a cafe, research your medical issues in a library.

A good mood lifter (though I can't promise it has any effect if you are in constant pain) is to do something new every day. Anything. Cook a new recipe, listen to a new radio station for an hour. Put a different outfit together. Sign up to a free online course if you're not well enough to leave the house. Etc. One a day.

Onlyhereforthebatshitneighbours · 08/07/2023 17:17

I'm sorry you're struggling so much Flowers

have you come across the Curable app? I started using it recently and so far, so good - it helps people manage chronic pain and seems to have had great results for some.

Do you have family or friends nearby ypu can invite over for a cup of tea? I have found that those people who are true friends are quite happy to adjust our catch ups so they are done in a way which is manageable for me.

Onlyhereforthebatshitneighbours · 08/07/2023 17:20

Also - I like the radio when I'm on my own, it feels more intimate and means I feel less alone then the TV. And see if your local council runs any community projects you can get involved in, often these are aimed to include people with disabilities and health conditions so that they can take part in spite of pain, weakness, mobility issues etc.

Icanbuymyselfflowers22 · 08/07/2023 17:26

SoWhatEh · 08/07/2023 17:15

How long have you been on meds and had counselling? They are a really good start but will take time.

Do you have any help with your sleep? Pain can cause sleeplessness and exhaustion always makes things worse. Have you tried taking an old style antihistamine to make you drowsy?

What about pain management? Could it be eased by physio? Have you had proper medical advice about non-addictive painkillers to reduce it?

Being alone for too long is very challenging. Even being alongside others is better than beingin total isolation. Bus and train rides, coffee in a cafe, research your medical issues in a library.

A good mood lifter (though I can't promise it has any effect if you are in constant pain) is to do something new every day. Anything. Cook a new recipe, listen to a new radio station for an hour. Put a different outfit together. Sign up to a free online course if you're not well enough to leave the house. Etc. One a day.

I've been on meds for fifteen years (several different types) and in counselling for the same amount of time with different counsellors who had different methods etc. My GP told me they won't refer me to physio because the waiting time is 8 months.

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