Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Chat

Join the discussion and chat with other Mumsnetters about everyday life, relationships and parenting.

Original poster

Would you invite an under 18’s girlfriend to your wedding?

22 replies

WedTheBed · 07/07/2023 17:11

Getting married soon, deadline has passed but I’ve been asked by a guest if their son (under 18) can bring his girlfriend (16).

They would be classed as adults when it comes to the meal/drinks package. So cost about £100 to have her there, I’ve met her once.

I hate letting people down but it seems weird; because they are literally still children 😅

Do I ask the venue if I can tag on another person? They might not be able to as the deadline was weeks ago, but is it even worth me asking?

OP posts:
romdowa · 07/07/2023 17:13

Honestly I'd say that the deadline for final numbers has passed and you can't add anyone else and leave it at that.

ThePoshUns · 07/07/2023 17:14

I think that's really cheeky of them. Why should you invite her her if you don't know her? Was the son already invited?
At that age they could be broken up on a few weeks / months. I wouldn't bother.

HushHushDarling · 07/07/2023 17:14

Absolutely not!

Interested in this thread?

Then you might like threads about this subject:

Weddings
Findyourneutralspace · 07/07/2023 17:14

It depends how serious they are. If they’ve been together ages and she’s part of the family I would. But you don’t have to if the deadline has passed.

SummerInSun · 07/07/2023 17:17

I definitely wouldn't invite her as you barely know her and it's a teenage romance that almost certainly will be over in months or weeks. You have the perfect excuse in that the deadline for final numbers has passed, just say "sorry, I'm afraid our deadline to give the venue final numbers has passed".

Probably the teenage son doesn't really want to come and trying to wrangle an invite for the GF is the parent's way of trying to bribe him to come.

If you are having an evening bit after the meal you could say she can come to that, but only if you want to.

calmcoco · 07/07/2023 17:22

I wouldn't care about the break up aspect or their ages.

The issue is they've been quite rude asking you to include an extra, because he's only invited by virtue of being a child of your friend.

You are well within your rights to say 'Sorry we can't add anyone, do tell Tom I totally understand if my wedding isn't his thing'.

FionnulaTheCooler · 07/07/2023 17:24

I'd tell them you've finalised numbers with the caterers now but you'll keep her in mind if you get any last minute cancellations.

SirChenjins · 07/07/2023 17:24

No - and we didn’t. They were invited to the evening reception as a compromise.

CC4712 · 07/07/2023 17:25

I'm assuming you are friends with the boys parents? I personally think its generous to invite their son, but for them to ask about the girlfriend is very cheeky and rude IMO.

Onthelow · 07/07/2023 17:26

Good idea to invite her to the evening do.

Clymene · 07/07/2023 17:27

No. You don't get a plus one when you're a kid. And he's a kid.

Also it's INCREDIBLY rude to ask if you can bring another person to a formal catered wedding

MaryJean87 · 07/07/2023 17:27

If it was a close family member then yes, if it was just a friend's son, no.

strawberrywhisk · 07/07/2023 17:30

Are they incapable of having an evening apart? I think it's such bad manners for them to ask you

Dragonsandcats · 07/07/2023 17:31

No I wouldn’t.

SweetAndSourChick3n · 07/07/2023 17:32

If the son is your nephew or other close relative then I would consider it, if not then a definite no

drpet49 · 07/07/2023 17:34

I wouldn’t invite any guest that I had only met once.

UsingChangeofName · 07/07/2023 17:34

No, and they are incredibly rude to ask.

Anyway, the deadline has passed so it isn't even an option in your situation.

Unexpectedlysinglemum · 07/07/2023 17:34

Only to the evening bit if it doesn't cost you more.
You could also say to the friend, it would cost £100 would he be willing to pay that I'm so sorry but our budget wouldn't stretch to extra plus 1s?

MrsMitford3 · 07/07/2023 17:35

I suspect the son has told his parents he doesn't want to go unless his GF comes...

Jobalob · 07/07/2023 18:00

Absolutely y not

Lastqueenofscotland2 · 07/07/2023 18:02

I’d just say no, not at this late stage.

EasterBreak · 07/07/2023 18:04

So rude to ask. Definitely say no.

New posts on this thread. Refresh page
Swipe left for the next trending thread