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DS bad poo

2 replies

Anotherlatteone · 06/07/2023 02:51

I'm not sure where to post this...

DS (6) stays with his dad one night per week, another evening he'll go there after school but then gets dropped off after dinner. We separated 2 years ago, it's a long story but we are on friendly enough terms to co-parent DS.

My issue week after week is that when DS comes home, he often 9/10 times will have runny poo and diarrhoea. It's a noticeable change compared to the rest of the week. Week after week it's like this. I've noted to Ex that this is the case. Ex's hygiene standards are not great. He is one of those people who doesn't "see dirt" and creates more mess and dirt than not. Some examples from when we were married include not washing his hands properly and leaving grey stains on the hand towels, leaving poo bits on the toilet seat, not washing and drying pots and pans thoroughly enough so they would smell mouldy the next day, not cooking food thoroughly and serving half cooked chicken on occasions or deliberately not heating up food to piping hot as he didn't like it when things were "too hot to eat"...You get the idea.

My worry is that these bad habits are continuing and whilst DS is staying with him, this is the cause of the bad poos. I don't know how to address it with Ex. He does love our son and takes care of him best he can but I also feel terrible every time DS comes home and has the shits. Today he came home and couldn't even hold the poo in :(

How do I put it to Ex that he needs to get to the bottom on this (excuse the pun)...

OP posts:
Valhalla17 · 06/07/2023 03:06

Yes it could be if he's that gross, but are you sure the dodgy poo isn't actually from stress/anxiety on the day of your ds going to his father in the first place?

kittycatsmum · 06/07/2023 03:09

Is that why you split it would drive me mad!

It's definitely something going on at dads- could it be a genuine food intolerance/ allergy though?

Is it both days (weekend and tea visit) this happens as surely it would also happen there on the overnight stay?

It definitely needs addressing as the things you described could make ds very ill.

Only other route is if gp would take a stool sample but seems a long winded option when from how you describe dad it's 99% a hygiene issue.

Poor ds.

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