ADHD or sensitive 10 year old

[Happinessischeeseontoast]

My 10yo girl has always been sensitive. As a baby we kept to a fairly rigid nap routine because she would become hysterical when just a bit tired. She would go into complete rages, practically speaking tongues, as a 5 year old when upset. And now as a 10 yo she cries considerably more than her peers. She cries a few times per day because of minor things. When she's not upset she is usually quite happy, chatty and can get hyper.

I'm wondering now whether this could be inattentive ADHD. She frequently gets hobbies which she is very intense and passionate about but then very quickly moves on. We have a house full of various crafts and lists that she writes for all her plans.

She has poor handwriting and concentration and maths isn't a strong point but she is very creative and an avid reader. She worries a lot about her friends and school but conversely seems to get so much out of her friendships and good days at school are amazing for her. She puts a lot of pressure on herself to be good, which she is naturally.

She is a wonderful kid and I don't wish to label her but I worry about her sensitivity and that she could be susceptible to anxiety and depression as the teenage years loom.

Do these behaviours sound like ADHD or just a sensitive kid and if the latter, how do you help children to learn some coping mechanisms.

Parent of 10 yr old DS with ADHD here.

Don’t want to be unhelpful, but I’d say it could be either.

ADHD is a tricky one because we all exhibit some of the symptoms to a certain extent, but it’s the intensity of them, and whether they are affecting her ability to interact in the same way as her peers.

I’d also say that I’m not familiar with how it presents in girls, so it may well be typical behaviour from a girl with ADHD.

I’d recommend raising your concerns with the Sen co at school and speak to teachers. Is her behaviour more extreme than her peers ? Is it affecting her ability to interact/learn etc?

Her concentration ( or lack of) is a big one. So too is the poor handwriting. Especially since she’s bright. That may point to something else going on. She is clever enough to understand the work, so she should be able to engage with it. It might be some other learning difficulty though- like sensory processing.

Anxiety is a common issue with ADHD, but she doesn’t need to be diagnosed with it to tackle the anxiety.

I reckon your best strategy is to get her help with dealing with anxiety. Is there a school counsellor? We can all learn better ways of coping with anxiety. I think that would really help her. Maybe see if school can recommend books for kids.

Marcus Rashford has co- written a good one - might not be great if she doesn’t like football!

hopefully someone will be along with more useful suggestions for books/apps etc!

Your reply is helpful, it's a bit of a silly question as I know it is quite a complex thing but knowing it's not completely out of the question is useful.

The tears is definitely an extreme compared to her peers. She has a really good group of friends but unfortunately her crying hasn't gone unnoticed and she does get teased for it a bit. Not enough to tackle with the school but it's an easy thing for another child to throw at her which does happen.

Other than the crying I would find it hard to distinguish the other examples as being out of the norm for some children but they have jumped out when I've looked online.

School counselor is a great shout. I've not wanted to press about senco as she does well enough at school and some of her stresses are really minor and not something a long winded diagnosis would address - it's more the reason why she blows these minor things out of proportion.

Might be worth a chat with the senco anyway. They don’t need a diagnosis to offer help and suggestions.

They can advise on strategies for both you and the school for concentration issues. They may also be able to provide support to help with handwriting.