4th birthday gift etiquette

[boobyandacuddle]

Off the back of the delightful christening gift thread... my daughter will turn 4 soon. We've booked a party and are likely to have 20ish kids come and I don't really want 20 gifts. We have plenty and she has a younger sibling so lots of things not suitable to have out and end up tucked away. Evidenced by her 3rd birthday party. Plus we don't have endless space and would rather reduce waste. I've seen people on MN mention a fiver limit. Or say no gifts? Or can I say get her a book? Don't want to be rude or ungrateful at all and she'll be delighted with whatever she receives. Do we just need to suck it up? Or can we put it on the invitation?

No gifts, please. Written in the invitation. I received an invitation like this when I was a child, only now can I see the wisdom of it.

I just think it’s mean, half the fun for the children is opening the gifts, and I’d feel uncomfortable not giving one.
I usually pick a few to use straight away usually a book and a toy and put the rest in the cupboard, some I regift, but often save them for meals out or for play date activities.
it’s like weddings, people don’t like being told what to do

I used to put lots away for during the year, it’s amazing how a new craft set brightens up a rainy day indoors.

You can put down "no gifts" but you will still get some and then other parents feel guilty/embarrassed. Or you end up with lots of sweets.

I would just go through any gifts, take things like craft kits away for rainy days, books for the holiday maybe.

Put "No gifts, please, but if you would like to, bung a few quid to Children In Need/Save the Donkeys/the BNP" on the invitation. Maybe not the last one, but pick a charity.

Some children don't go to birthday parties because their parents can't afford a present, or a costly enough one, and they're too embarrassed to send them. Sometimes the children are too embarrassed to go, for the same reason. No gifts solves that issue, and frankly gift-biying for your 4 year old's pal can be a PITA for any of us. The parents might silently thank you.

I think you suck it up and put stuff away, regift as you can

After birthdays we open all the presents then I sort them out and put lots of them away to re-gift. I got through most of the parties one year re-gifting presents

Regifting, why didn't I think of that? Appeals to the waste hater in me! Just need to keep tabs on who gave what so as not to regift back to the giver!

This is a good idea.

My dd always puts several away for re-gifting - Gdcs go to masses of parties and invite masses of friends to theirs. TBH the number of presents does get ridiculous.

I think it's fine to say '"no gifts please" or I thought about saying "please don't feel you need to bring a gift, but if you do a book would be preferred as we have lots of toys"

or say nothing and gift some to charity

we just had a birthday and it is fun for them getting toys

any that we had duplicates of or I didn't want, I didn't open, I've put away in a cupboard to regift or give to charity

My only thing with regifting is I like to give something nice so I don't feel comfortable regifting something I don't like myself but if it's a duplicate or just not age appropriate or whatever then that's fine.