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Influencer/celeb gossip forums

110 replies

Kingsparkle · 03/07/2023 07:59

I follow a woman on social media, mainly because I like her aesthetic and she gives me ideas of brands etc to look at. One of her children has a genetic condition and she raises money for an organisation supporting young people with this condition. She recently posted about it and I wanted to read more about it so I googled her and up popped a Reddit thread.

It was full of people calling her narcissistic and an alcoholic, insulting her children’s appearance and claiming they have no friends. Claiming she’s a terrible mother etc. People were picking apart anything she’d posted, analysing her friends and family’s demeanour towards her. Someone had even looked up financial information about her.

I knew that people on SM often got a hard time but I honestly didn’t realise it was this bad. Why? Why do people feel the need to do this? If you are part of these forums what do you get out of it. I am genuinely curious what motivates people to be this vicious, particularly towards someone they’ve never met.

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Ifyouwantmeillbeinthebar · 03/07/2023 13:44

I read tattle, some threads are discussed more constructively than others, I guess it depends what demographic follows the influencer/you tuber in question.

The Ingham’s for example, lots to discuss and bring to light on them, Dad messaging under age girls, profiting of their children, questionable/un safe parenting how because they have a quite a young audience there tends to just be loads of name calling and insults which I think distracts from the real issues.

On a whole though Tattle is mostly a forum for holding influencers accountable for their shady behaviour and there is a shit ton of it, racism, child exploitation, cooking the books, undeclared add’s…

One person who I follow on there doesn’t show her kids on the Instagram/stories but if you subscribe to her members page for £15 a month she does!!! 🤢

Its just all absolutely vulgar and definitely think Tattle has a place to bring it all to light.

It’s worth saying as well that on the flip side and behind the glossy “Be Kind” and “Strong Girls Club” brigade on Instagram with their fake cup of tea and mandatory sleeve down to their knuckle, calling you all her besties while aff inking the fuck out of every product in shot are responsible for so much poor mental health in their followers, whether that comes from comparing the polished family makeup, body, house size, lifestyle, bank balance, glowing pregnancies and lots more stuff that seems so out of reach for most of us.

Kingsparkle · 03/07/2023 14:09

@Ifyouwantmeillbeinthebar - I definitely agree with your last paragraph. They have so much to answer for.

I’m not saying they should get a free pass etc but for me there is a big difference between “this person is not being transparent about the money they are asking people to donate, here is what I’ve found” or “they aren’t declaring ads” etc and the gleeful way people use it as justification to say things like “stupid ugly bitch, bet her useless husband is only with her for the money and her toddler is so fat”. I’ve seen a lot more of the latter than the former. In fact I think it was on here someone called part time working mummy’s toddler fat in a thread, which I thought was beyond the pale. It was the first time I’d heard of her and just thought it was disgusting. She might be a terrible person but that doesn’t give adults online a free pass to insult her poor kid or her husband or her appearance etc.

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Ifyouwantmeillbeinthebar · 03/07/2023 14:34

@Kingsparkle I get it, but that will happen anywhere if you put yourself and your family out there as different people have different social graces and public forums like tattle, Reddit and even on here where discussions are not heavily moderated and people can have their say will attract all sorts.

Its our job as parents however to protect our children from it, you said it yourself these people must know that there are awful comments being made about them so why would you continue to put yourself and your children on the firing line.

I cannot imagine in my wildest dreams exposing my children to my 260k followers made up of who knows what kind of people, learning they are being criticised online and that there are things out there written about them that will be there for them and all to see forever more and thinking fuck it and doing the exact same thing the next again day.

Yes there are people that will say awful things about others peoples children online but there are also mothers failing to protect their children and allowing it to happen…

I know which one I think is worse.

Kingsparkle · 03/07/2023 14:49

@Ifyouwantmeillbeinthebar - I fully agree children shouldn’t be online, if you looked at my limited social media you probably wouldn’t know I even had a child. But I still don’t think it in anyway justifies the vitriol and the hate. It’s nothing to do with different social graces as the few of these sorts of threads I’ve seen have been about British people so it’s likely the vast majority of posters are British too. Although the thread was actually sparked by an American but I think calling someone a narcissistic alcoholic is probably rude there too.

I know people feel justified in their nasty comments by pointing out the wrongs of the influencer but two wrongs don’t make a right as they say. I don’t think someone else’s bad behaviour that doesn’t affect you really is a free pass to troll someone.

For example, I don’t like how the SacconeJolys use their children (or one child specifically) for views/money. Especially after watching the Stacey Dooley doc. I just don’t follow them. I don’t feel the need to pour over their content in painful detail, personally insult them online, call up advertisers/social services/children’s schools etc. I just ignore them and don’t provide them with revenue.

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happyshineyperson · 03/07/2023 14:58

But if no one calls the S-J’s out then they will just continue to get away with what they are doing to their children (anyone remember the cold shower punishments?)
And the children will continue to suffer.

Thebirdhouse · 03/07/2023 14:59

^For example, I don’t like how the SacconeJolys use their children (or one child specifically) for views/money. Especially after watching the Stacey Dooley doc. I just don’t follow them. I don’t feel the need to pour over their content in painful detail, personally insult them online, call up advertisers/social services/children’s schools etc. I just ignore them and don’t provide them with revenue.*

I don’t know PT mummy or the others you are talking about but I’m well aware of the SJs.

The SJs do everything they can to generate publicity from books to radio interviews to newspaper articles - lies after lies after lies. They want people to talk about them.

I find it very odd that you just happened to find Tattle and have read about so many different ‘influencers’ already.

Are you writing an article about online trolling?

Kingsparkle · 03/07/2023 15:16

Haha @Kingsparkle definitely not, I work in finance 😂, but I’m home ill at the moment hence I’m on Mumsnet! I used to live very locally to the SacconeJolys in Redhill/Reigate but I’ve moved now. I used to follow them on Instagram just because they were minor local celebs and I’m nosey. Then I watched the Stacey Dooley doc for the same reason. I don’t follow them anymore because I didn’t like what they were doing.

As I said above I do follow some influencers and I specifically googled the one that sparked this thread and found the Reddit thread as it was the third result on google. I have also seen threads on influencers here and so have looked at Tattle when it’s been mentioned. I’m not hiding that. I’ve also been listening to a lot of Jon Ronson recently and his podcast about his book So you’ve been publicly shamed (highly recommend) and so was interested in the subject of online trolling/hate and why people do it.

Hope that helps, not everyone is a journo, I just fancied a chat about a subject that interests me at the moment because I don’t understand the mindset.

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Kingsparkle · 03/07/2023 15:16

Sorry I meant to tag @Thebirdhouse

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radiatorpipe · 03/07/2023 15:21

I think there's some nuance to the debate. I myself have said on here that X celeb is unattractive or X celeb annoys me.

I also think the whole Kardashian's phenomenon should be criticised.

People don't like being lied to & the UK public hates hypocrisy so some influencers will attract that. Personally I wouldn't join a forum to hate watch them but equally I find it weird that people follow people just to copy them.

radiatorpipe · 03/07/2023 15:24

Also the narrative of don't like don't look also applies to people not wanting to read something negative about themselves. No 1 rule for famous people is don't google yourself!

radiatorpipe · 03/07/2023 15:27

It's not new! Has anyone heard the abuse footballers get? And that's often to their face.

Kingsparkle · 03/07/2023 15:29

@radiatorpipe - I am also talking about the people who ring children’s schools/social services etc. It’s not just a case of not googling yourself anymore.

Just because it’s not new, doesn’t make it ok.

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PurpleBaskets · 03/07/2023 15:32

The damage these people are doing to their kids is far, far, FAR worse than anything that people are saying about them online. I think tattle is great at calling out what is going on. Sure, you get the odd comment that isn’t great but that’s the same anywhere.

radiatorpipe · 03/07/2023 15:32

I had no idea people did that, obviously that's crazy. I don't think anyone would argue reporting someone maliciously to social services is a reasonable thing to do! Although I'm not sure I would believe someone who claimed to do that on a forum.

radiatorpipe · 03/07/2023 15:34

Just because it’s not new, doesn’t make it ok.

It is life though, noons can put themself in the public eye and escape criticism & comment. I love Adele, people on here will think she's dreadful. I think Tom Hardy is gorgeous, others on here will think i have shit in my eyes 🤷🏻‍♀️

marewindham · 03/07/2023 15:35

The thing with Tattle is that even when they're "exposing" people who have done objectively terrible and abusive or dishonest things, they seem more concerned with attacking the person's physical appearance, making bigoted comments, and slinging childish nicknames around. They also seem to really hate women, fixate on women's bodies and appearances, while men can do no wrong.

For example, Alice Evans. She's clearly mentally unwell and a longterm abuser, but Tattle seem more concerned with her unflattering lipstick than with the emotional abuse she's inflicting on her daughters.

Liz Jones accepted money from people in dire straights after writing lie after lie and beg after beg about her financial situation (in between bragging about all her designer stuff), yet her Tattle threads are just non-stop jabs at her breasts (she had breast reduction surgery when she was young), her hair, claiming that she must be lying about having suffered from an eating disorder because she doesn't look thin enough in photos, etc. They've made up all kinds of nasty names for her which are mainly based on her physical appearance. There are so many legitimate things about LJ to discuss, why attack her breasts, especially when her decision to have her breasts removed when she was young was so obviously related to her body dysmorphia and her eating disorder?

Caitlin Moran, same, plenty of legit criticisms but it's just full of bigoted comments claiming she's not really working class because her parents were nasty dirty hippies who chose to rely on benefits instead of working. Whatever choices her parents did or did not make, how is that her fault? How on earth is someone who grew up in Wolverhampton, with no money, on benefits, had no access to education at all, no access to career opportunities, and one of the very few people to succeed in media without nepotism/having attended the right posh school, not working class? And the whole "ugh those awful people who chose to live on disability benefits because they're lazy" trope is both classicist and ableist.

Carrie Hope Fletcher, they attack stuff that's totally commonplace and the norm for professional actors. Like they slag her off all the time for putting a mix of posts about her personal life and posts about her acting roles on social media, by saying "if I put stuff about my work on my social media I'd be FIRED this is so unprofessional!" Like duh you're obviously not a professional actor? Why would anyone think actors posting about their acting projects on social media is "unprofessional"? So weird and out of touch, and the threads about her are full of fat shaming and insults about her body, weight, hair, and overall appearance too.

A friend of mine is a disabled woman and a disabled rights activist and professional model, and Tattle slagged her off for posing in lingerie and bikinis. But posing has been an amazing way for her to develop a platform, and a visible mobility impaired person modelling lingerie and being on magazine covers and catwalks is pretty damn extraordinary in terms of disability visibility. And why shouldn't an attractive young woman do modelling work? There's not even any substance to their criticisms, just "I don't like seeing disabled people in a bikini I think it's gross, cover yourself up." Just weird puritanism and hatred of minorities.

marewindham · 03/07/2023 15:38

(Fwiw I've never looked at any of the Tattler threads for influencers, except for my friend, just the threads for mainstream celebs/actors. I agree that influencer culture and "momfluencers" is toxic so maybe the Tattle threads about influencers are different from the way they talk about regular celebs, I don't know.)

Kingsparkle · 03/07/2023 15:41

Thanks @marewindham - that’s what I’m trying to get across.

Saying I don’t like a celeb/influencer because they do XYZ is fine. But it’s the personal attacks and bizarre detail and obsession that comes with the hate comments that I don’t understand and I think it negates any “good work” these forums might do.

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radiatorpipe · 03/07/2023 15:41

The thing with Tattle is that even when they're "exposing" people who have done objectively terrible and abusive or dishonest things, they seem more concerned with attacking the person's physical appearance, making bigoted comments, and slinging childish nicknames around

Tbf if you look at any Boris, Trump, Harry & Meghan thread on here you will see similar.

Chocolatesandroses · 03/07/2023 15:42

Tattle is harsh at times and I found it once by accident . I remember reading a post about an influencer and they were calling the influencers child who is 9 awful names . That’s where I think it’s completely wrong . Does anyone remember the story of a couple who were influencers who adopted a child and that child end up having autism so they gave him up for adoption because he had autism . They use to do a lot of videos with him and apparently they use to get paid more when they did videos with him .

radiatorpipe · 03/07/2023 15:42

I have read Meghan threads on her because i've often defended her. The way people twist themselves in knots to criticise every single thing she does is mental.

Thebirdhouse · 03/07/2023 15:43

radiatorpipe · 03/07/2023 15:32

I had no idea people did that, obviously that's crazy. I don't think anyone would argue reporting someone maliciously to social services is a reasonable thing to do! Although I'm not sure I would believe someone who claimed to do that on a forum.

Are you new to MN?

Go to any one of the thousand threads about Meghan Markle and you will see examples of a very low level of human nature.

Maybe go on one of the Meghan Markle threads OP and pose your question there.

The type of people you are questioning are frequent posters there.

radiatorpipe · 03/07/2023 15:44

I haven't seen anyone say they had called social services on Meghan

Kingsparkle · 03/07/2023 15:45

@radiatorpipe - I agree the Harry and Megan threads on here are mad. I ignore that whole section. I am not singling out Tattle, it’s just the most famous. It’s the online obsessive hate I am trying to get my head around. I just don’t understand getting a kick out of hating someone that much when you’ve never even met them.

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Kingsparkle · 03/07/2023 15:47

@Thebirdhouse - I am not brave enough for a Harry and Meghan thread.

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