Did you have space for a nursery room? Feeling bad!

[Fireflii]

We have a small two bed home and with interest rates unlikely to be able to move anywhere bigger until the economy has stabilised which might be 2-3 years at least according to BoE predictions.

We want to start a family but currently the 2nd room has one of DHs wardrobes in it, plus we are thinking of putting a small desk in there for work from home purposes instead of having it in the lounge. The room is about 11ftx6.5ft. After our furniture if we’re lucky we’d probably get in a cot, a chest of drawers and possibly a bookshelf and chair.

Our room couldn’t accommodate DH wardrobe and desk as we’ve already got a chest of drawers and my wardrobe in here. There would be space for a next to me crib by our bed that would be about it.

Would it be weird and not the done thing to keep other furniture in the ‘nursery’. Has anyone else done this before? On social media you see these massive nurseries where there’s just baby items inside the room but we don’t have the room for our other storage like this.

As others have said fine for the first few years but eventually they need their own room. Put the desk in your own bedroom?

Fine for the first year or so imo. But after that you'll need a plan. Move your desk downstairs and downsize your wardrobes. I have a teeny wardrobe but LOTS of clothes (I love clothes and don't get rid of them unless they're falling apart). I just reorganise my wardrobe every few months and create seasonal capsules 🤓 (which is such a cringey phrase 😂).

Or if you do move all the better.

Fwiw we rented a 2 bed flat till dc1 was 11 mo then bought our house

Do you have an en suite? That could become a working nook with wardrobe on 1 wall.

Op the clothes really aren't the issue, as I sat my Dads clothes were in our room until we moved house - I was 11 DSis 15.
It's not like he was wearing dress shirts and suits every day.

You could rejuggle the wardrobes so both your everyday stuff is in your room and going out stuff in the kids room.

Take up your mums offer of desk space in their house.

Have you considered not having so many clothes between you?

I've got a dressing table/drawers with a pullout surface to use as a second desk, which keeps work separate from the main living area.

Bit of a non-issue? Severely cull your clothes and other stuff, most people have way too much stuff that doesn't get used. Vacuum pack off-season clothes and bedding, maybe your parents would be willing to store them for you.

Look at building in a proper wardrobe instead of freestanding ones.

Take up parents offer of WFH space.

Don't buy too much baby stuff, keep it minimal.

Save like mad to fund your move (could be difficult once you're paying for childcare)

Hold off having a second baby until you've got the space.

Nah no en suite

We lived in a 1 bed flat until our oldest was 11 months old. It was fine (though I was delighted to get her into her own room).

Thank you, this makes me feel a lot better!

For the first at least a year mine was in our room and her nursery just sat there, I just put her clothes in it. Really I found the necessity for anything more came around 2.5 when she was aware the nursery was a space for her and she started playing in it more and enjoying going to bed in it. Before then, a massive insta nursery would have been a waste as she was in our room in her cot/ only sleeping for first half of night in nursery. All your baby needs is your time, attention and care at first not all the stuff influencers shove in our faces everyday.

My parents only live 2 miles away and have plenty of office space I could use so it’s an alternative I guess as they have offered
That sounds like a sensible idea and would let you separate home and work.
How old are you parents, how accessible is your home? Our neighbours were in the same situation and did a house swap once the flat became too small for their DC.

All your baby needs is your time, attention and care at first not all the stuff influencers shove in our faces everyday

It's not about what the baby needs though it's about how sensible it is to have stuff like a work desk in a room where that baby will soon be a toddler and liable to access it.

The baby doesn't need much at all, you're correct but the child will need a room and having dads wardrobe full of clothes in there and mum's work desk is not practical long term so the OP needs a plan B should the house move not happen as anticipated.

You see all sorts on social media OP, mostly if not exclusively (when it comes to career influencers) you are seeing the result of privilege, a lot of disposable income and a lot of gifted DIY work/furniture and decorative freebies. These are then styled within an inch of their life for a photograph or reel.

Yes they're 'real homes' in the sense they do exist and have a family residing in them but it's not representative of what most people's homes look like. It's far better to aim for using your own home as best you can space wise and making it something that works as best it can for your family within your budget. A baby doesn't know it doesn't have it's own room or what that means in any facet of the concept.

If you're short on wardrobe space I'd first try having a strict clearout and seeing if you can reduce it down or share wardrobe space. Out of season clothes you don't currently use or wear can be vacuum packed and put away - under beds in boxes, in the loft etc. Make sure you are maximising space in the furniture you do choose and buy - eg if a desk make sure it has drawer space underneath rather than an open bottom, utilise wall space for shelving and so on.

Shock horror but my 3rd child slept in our bedroom until he was 2 due to lack of space! He is nearly 8 now and doesn't appear to be traumatised! I had a lovely nursery for my 1st, but hardly used it for the first 6/7 months, and then they don't tend to use their rooms for anything other then sleeping until about 2/3 years. I think you will be fine, you've still got to get/be pregnant which could still mean another year until you actually have a baby! Personally I would put all your wardrobes/drawers and desk etc into the 2nd bedroom if they fit, and would set up a little baby corner in your own bedroom. Toys etc go in the living room!

To be honest that is not a bad idea

Working from home (I know people love it) to me means your home is dragged into the world of work and vice versa. To go somewhere else where you are also comfortable and with little commute, access to the kitchen etc, probably could take a young baby too once she comes along, is ideal and also you dont pay for it and it means once you finish work for the day you come away into your own home

I think I would take them up on that.

Thank you I think I might it’s only a ten minute drive and my mum works PT now anyway so I would have the space most the time by myself since I’m hybrid anyway

Thank you for this! Some good tips x

They’re only late 50s they’ll probably want to stay there a while yet.

We haven't got one, our house is tiny and we've had to split the second bedroom into half nursery half office cos my partner works remotely. I feel a bit shit about it, but we don't have the money to move atm. I've just tried to make her half as lovely as possible!

Aw don’t feel bad! What did you fit into the half?

My cousin lives in a 1 bed with their 5 year old. A friend lived in their 1 bed until LO was 18 months old. Not everyone can afford to move to a bigger house. People manage. So will you.

Thank you, I’m guessing they must just share the room?

@Fireflii yes, they share. They shared a bed for a long time but LO has his bed alongside his parents now.

It's fine, 2 of mine were in my room till they were about 18 months (separately) 1 was about a year and the last was 2 years before he moved out of our bedroom.

You can always go to a plan b if things don't work like working in the lounge/at parents house

We’re not doing a nursery initially, I don’t get the point as they sleep in your room for 6 months so we’ll just have the cot in there. At that point DH will have to sacrifice his study and we’ll use that for baby. Fortunately we have 3 bedrooms so he’ll work from our spare room.