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Needing carers leave not long after returning from Mat Leave

10 replies

Leni89 · 30/06/2023 15:01

I returned from Mat leave a few months ago now. I've taken a lot of annual leave (I had 6 weeks worth of accrued leave plus all of this years AL) and had 3 days off sick very recently (awful vomiting, NHS clinical so can't go in vomiting or wfh).

Family member who looks after DC has messaged this morning to say they have injured themselves and are likely to be unable to have LO for a week or two. DP and other family can cover most of the days except for Monday and Thursday next week and as it stands unless somebody says they can have LO I'll need to take it off.

I feel a bit like I'm taking the piss but we have no other childcare. Before anybody says put them in nursery - if LO was in nursery I'd have probably been off continuously as family are willing to have them at times nursery absolutely would not e.g. temperature, vomiting, loose poo.

Any advice? Can they say no? The policy is 5 days paid carers leave (I haven't taken any) and I'm happy to take AL. One of the days we have no childcare for there's a blanket ban on AL due to a meeting and 'team bonding' afternoon! Should I wait till Monday to say rather than give them a heads up? It's not going to change that we have no childcare for those days. Luckily both of those days would only affect admin, meetings etc. and not patient appointments.

OP posts:
Hairyfairy01 · 30/06/2023 15:06

I wouldn't be getting that as carers leave at my workplace, unpaid at best. I know you said dp is covering some of it but is he having to request time off his work or does it just happen to fall in days he's not working.

Leni89 · 30/06/2023 15:21

We both work full time. DP's work are wonderful they are happy to give him carer's leave (he has already taken some when we had an emergency with LO on a day we were both working) and annual leave to cover what's needed. Another family member who has LO regularly can cover time too.

My trusts policy is just 5 days paid carer's leave per year and I haven't taken any whilst DP has. I'm very happy to take annual leave or unpaid leave to cover it.

My understanding is they can't actually say no to reasonable time off for dependents (and I think 2 days is reasonable) but whilst I was hopsitalised after loosing a baby they were absolute arses so I won't underestimate them.

OP posts:
DappledThings · 30/06/2023 15:21

I would approve CL for that without any issue.

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Doggymummar · 30/06/2023 15:23

Surely that's parental leave? Carers leave for non child caring duties

Catsonskis · 30/06/2023 15:24

They have to allow you the time off, but they don’t have to pay you - unpaid parental leave. But honestly it’s more hassle than it’s worth to arrange for you to lose a day or twos pay. Just tell them you’ve explored all your options, you’re giving them notice too.

it’s expected that parents take time off not long after the mother returns to work, kids always get sick in new care environments!

Leni89 · 30/06/2023 15:26

Our policy actually says 'dependents' leave and it covers immediate family including parents and children. It's the first time I'd ever have taken any so i'm not 100% sure what's what!

My understanding for parental leave is this and I only need 2 days, not a week:

https://www.gov.uk/parental-leave

Unpaid parental leave

Employer and employee guide to unpaid parental leave - eligibility, how much leave can be taken and notice periods

https://www.gov.uk/parental-leave

OP posts:
Florencenotflo · 30/06/2023 15:27

I'll be honest, as a manager, any time I have a Mum return to work (or any employee who's child is just starting nursery/school and their partner is returning to work) it has to be expected that there will be teething problems in the first 6 months. Kids start nursery and get every cold, germ and bug going (usually resulting in the parents also being ill). Kids don't always settle immediately either and at the end of the day, things happen. If you have A/L to use I'd offer to use that and maybe save the carers leave/parental leave for when you do need it/

Florencenotflo · 30/06/2023 15:29

I don't think you could use parental leave here, it's more for planned absence. You need to give I think a few weeks notice and can only be taken in blocks of one week.

Leni89 · 30/06/2023 15:31

Thanks @Florencenotflo I agree, I don't need a week either!

That reply was more for @Doggymummar - sorry just figured out how to tag people.

OP posts:
MoserRothOrangeandAlmond · 30/06/2023 16:08

I'm NHS and it wouldn't be carers leave as it's planned in advance so it's planned absence.
It would be either annual leave or unpaid leave.

Carers/dependents leave is more of an emergency for example: this week my husband got taken into hospital and I was with him most of the night and have a young child to care for. Special leave was granted.

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