Baby not playing with toys

[angrsaurus]

Baby is 11 months old and doesn't play with toys, he just throws them around. Throws, then crawls after them, throws again etc. I wouldn't be concerned but he doesn't seem to know how to put something down - he has never released a toy with control or put something down on the floor, table, in a box, into my hand etc. Everything just goes flying. Should I be worried? Is there anything I can do to encourage him and help learn how to put toys down? I model lots but it doesn't seem to be working. I put toys in a box, then pass him a toy and hold the box out - he just throws the toy in a different direction, then reaches for the box and throws that too 🤷‍♀️

Bump

He is playing though throwing stuff is a great game! Do you play with him rolling balls building towers etc ?

@Mrsjayy yeah he just grabs it, puts in his mouth and then throws! Whatever it is, a box, a ball, a building block, a soft toy, you name it

He is playing! My 11 month old also doesn't release/let go of toys with control, he either throws it or just opens his hand & lets it fall to the ground or into a cup/box. Try not to worry, he'll get there. We had our 12 month review recently (it can take place any time between 9 - 14 months according to the questionnaire) - he was considered "behind" on a few tasks so will be having an additional review in a few months however the week after we saw the HV he started doing some of the things he was supposedly behind on. If we'd had the appointment one week later we would have had a different result probably.

I remember this phase, everything was gripped tightly or chucked. And there wasn’t much interest in the actual toys.

He should have his 1 year health visitor check soon and they’ll give you a long questionnaire to fill in. Hopefully that will reassure you he’s doing all the right things.

Me building a tower with stacking cups and DS knocking it down was his favourite game at that age.

I wouldn't be too worried my son is the same age and the only time he technically plays with anything he's smashing them together or smacking it, otherwise he is up and about causing chaos else where like my kitchen cupboards. I wouldn't worry too much, it'll all come with time 😀

Thanks all, I looked up the 12m questionnaire and now I'm really worried ☹️ He does almost everything from gross and fine motor skills, some personal-social and problem solving but barely any from communication.

I haven't had a letter through yet about the 12m review so not sure when it will be. He just turned 11m last week.

Hi OP, my DD is 10.5 months (she'll be 11 months on the 8th July). The 12 month review you mentioned, I'm not sure if each area do it differently, but where I live they do the review between 9.5 and 10.5 months, so DD had hers last week. Like your son, she also doesn't put things down controlled. When she's finished with something, it's almost as though she's forgotten she's holding it and just causally dismisses it by letting it fall on the floor.
I think she probably scored low on her review for this, but I'm not concerned, and neither was HV. She also scored low on the majority of her gross motor skills because she can't bend to pick a toy and return to a standing position, and she also doesn't crawl, she kind of half crawls/half bum shuffles. Again, I'm not concerned and neither is HV. They all do things at such different rates, and it's easy to focus on what they "can't" yet do, rather than what they can! I know for my DD, what she's currently lacking in her gross motor she makes up for in her language, whereas others may be better at something else, such as fine motor, problem solving etc.
If you're concerned then mention it to your HV, but mine reassured me that its the 2 year review that they focus more on, this is more just to check that they're on the right track (e.g. might not be walking, but showing signs of pulling self up, crawling/shuffling around room etc).

He's a baby! It's what they do. As much as anything, playing takes imagination and experience of the world which they don't yet have. Most baby toys are for the parents' benefit rather than the baby. Babies don't 'play'.

As for the other stuff.

My eldest didn't speak until he was nearly 2. He managed to graduate from university though. My youngest was putting 3 or 4 words together by the time she was 1.

Are you exactly the same as every adult you know?

Chucking blocks and mummy's head is a great game! Also dropping cutlery and food out of high chair, smearing mashed potato into hair, grabbing and bending mummy's glasses, rolling away at a critical moment of nappy changing.

All great games. Besides, isn't throwing stuff basically all ball sports?! You have yourself a professional netball player there!

Phone the health visitor and ask to get it booked in as you’re concerned.

Please try not to worry though, they all do things at different stages. And it can be quite sudden that they just start doing things.

Hi @angrsaurus how did your little one come on?

@Mumof3bb1 he's absolutely fine now, I have no concerns whatsoever. I had to teach him how to put things down nicely instead of throwing and it was like he discovered a whole new world from there on!

Hi @angrsaurus
Thanks for your update! That's great to hear. Mine is the same at the moment, everything is thrown down with such sass! I was just wondering how you taught your little one to put things down nicely? :)

@TiredMummaChlo I'd give him a toy to hold, like a small ball or a block or a car etc, and hold a box/bowl in front of him, then encourage him to let go of the toy and I'd catch it with the box (or basically wait for him to let go of it). Or hold my hand over his and help him drop the toy in the container. Lots of praise when the toy went in (even if I had to catch it with the box rather than him aiming it properly). He got the idea very quickly, I want to say on the same day after a few tries but can't remember exactly.

Once he got an idea that he could put a toy down, it was just a matter of practice to get him to put it with control rather than drop. You can get toys like ball towers or permanence boxes etc to help with this too (we had both and he loooved them).

As others are saying, that is playing. It’s a schema, throwing, picking up and repeating. He just enjoys that particular schema by the sounds of it. You could try some cause and effect toys. They are simple and repetitive, great for those who like to figure things out!

sorry - just realised it’s an old thread!