Worry at work, handhold and ideas please TW MH

[Allchangename354]

there is a similar thread from another poster - I did not want to de-rail

Sorry this is long. Does anyone have tips on managing worry about work? I’m trying to keep in perspective it is a job and a mistake is not life threatening or anything.
(all this not helped by my period)

I have generally controlled depression but a little low. I’m worried I’m going to let people down one way or the other at work - I won’t meet targets for quality or target for quantity or miss both. targets impact the whole team (external monitoring)

last couple of weeks dealt with some difficult clients, one who upset me (I’m annoyed with myself I let him). Told my manager and asked if I did ok for the ones last week, worried about quality. It was next day and she did check if I was ok (I was that minute she asked) haven’t heard back, not sure I will.

Then a suicidal client this week, I took the appropriate steps, professional with her. (we are not an emergency or health service) Today I was tearful but felt I couldn’t tell a manager and am more anxious that taking minutes being upset in the toilets, just means less time with actual work. I did pull through. Urgh.

I'm not sure what job you do, but it sounds really challenging and perfectly natural that you would be upset in those circumstances. You're a human, not a robot! You say you managed to pull through - to me that means you're doing better than you think you are.

If the thought of talking to your boss makes you more anxious, is there anyone else you can talk to when you're finding things a bit tough? Sometimes we don't need someone who can fix things, we just need someone to remind us that it's OK, and we can handle it.

Thanks - The first call was pretty bad - I didn’t trust myself to not break down. Luckily was fine straightforward lbut I’m dreading the next client who is aggressive (rare) or very difficult or struggling. I am able to talk to colleagues a little and we know we do our best.

Feeling upset when someone is aggressive towards you is a completely understandable response. I'm sorry you were in that situation.

A little trick I use when I'm dealing with a difficult situation at work is to pretend that I am acting the part of someone doing my job, if that makes sense - so it's not really me having to deal with a difficult conversation, for example, but my imaginary character (who is very calm and confident and always knows exactly what they are doing!)

I love that tip @mybestchildismycat One of my work targets is already being more resilient between different clients if one is aggressive- being able to get on with the next person after a little break

I do admire those who work in MH and counsellors or other caring professionals and teachers who deal with this kind of stuff regularly and can’t necessarily put the phone down to someone aggressive which we can.

I'll give you some advice my wonderful, experienced colleagues have given me. Some I've followed, others are a work in progress. But just remember everyone, literally everyone around you, has had a bad day/week. This is normal.
You said you are able to end a call if someone is aggressive. Always keep that in mind, even if you don't intend to do this, it will make you feel more in control of the situation.
Aggressive, rude, disrespectful clients are either intending their rudeness towards the company or they're dickheads and they've got no friends.
You do get particularly nice ones, remember them. Make a note in a diary or just remember the compliments they gave you.
Always be open with your manager and your team. If you're worried about hitting target, chances are anyone will find a way around it because they want the stats individually and as a team.
If you have any mental health first aiders in the office, use them. That's why they exist, the more people use them the more the company will see their value.
Mistakes will always happen, always. Just take it on-board when giving the feedback, ask for advice on how to not repeat the mistake (if you need it) share your ideas on how your going to make changes. It's not the mistake that matters, it's how you react and deal with it.