Anyone else CONSTANTLY worry about work?

[ClickingTock123]

Have I fucked up? Have I made a mistake? Have I sent something to the wrong place? Was this documentation correct? Should that have been submitted? Does everyone think I'm a twat? Do people realise how stupid and socially awkward I am? Will I get sacked? Will I lose it all?

Let me just check this for the eighth time. I'll just log on and make sure this was done properly. I'll just pull the car over whilst driving home and check this figure was right.

It drives me fucking mad.

My first employer was a horrible bully who regularly left me in tears feeling completely worthless, although he apologised when I resigned and I ended up staying for four more peaceful years. We're still on respectable terms 15 years later. My second job (brilliant employers) I felt the same as the above for at least two years. Left last year on excellent terms in a senior role - they offered me several roles to stay but it was time to go. So here I am, 10 months into new role feeling utterly stressed.

Imposter syndrome, low self esteem, social awkwardness, general anxiety. Call it what you will.

My guts are all over the place, IBS is a nightmare. I hit the wine at the weekends and catastrophise (can't spell it) constantly.

HOW can you be the kind of office worker who just doesn't fret? I hate to say it... but it always seems to be men!

I used to be somewhat like this. The thing that changed it for me was when I left the job and it was revealed I was actually getting paid the least out of everyone in the team whilst doing way more than most and for longer.

It woke me up and I realised no amount of work was going to be worth the stress of taking it home with me when actually I wasn't being properly valued for any of it any way.

The organisation you work for won't fall apart if you log off and keep work within working hours. It's no way to live and I'm much happier now I have learned to leave work at work.

I think the key is every time you feel that urge distract yourself with something else and actively make the choice to ignore that feeling. It will get easier each time you do it and you'll soon realise there aren't any negative consequences for not doing so x

Thank you. I'm always telling myself don't log on don't log on... but I always do. Even on a Sunday 😳

I have this too, it's awful.

Make some boundaries, even if they are tiny. Like stop work an hour early on Friday, what you'll see is nobody will notice.

Then and this is the one I haven't cracked... parent yourself. What would you say to your kid if they were feeling like you? Do it on a situational basis and see if you feel any better.

Good luck

Oh my god yes, constantly. It’s exhausting. I moved a few months back to a new company from a very toxic environment and a very difficult boss. People at the new place are so much nicer the business is run very chaotically and I don’t feel I have a handle on things. Strangely since I’ve moved, despite the nice people its has gotten worse. This morning, I worried I’d left some papers on my desk in the office, I’m second, third, forth guessing everything I do.

Same! I went into the office on my annual leave to check what paperwork I'd left on my desk.

If it was a friend or relative I'd say "fuck them, stop worrying so much it's only a job you're fine and IF you ever lose it or fuck up massively you'll get another one. Everyone makes mistakes anyway stop trying to be perfect you can only do what you can do etc etc it's not worth damaging your health"

Can't take my own advice though when it concerns me! That's different!

Do you have kids? I was like this a lot before I did, but now I literally don't have the emotional capacity to care that amount about work as well as juggle everything else in my life.
Of course I'm not saying "have kids", but can you find a way to bring some elements of your personal life more to the centre of your day/week - even if that takes a lot of planning and intention - to help you see the bigger picture?

Me! Permanently thinking something has/will go wrong, I can never send something off and think “ok that’s a good job done”. Wfh has exacerbated it I’m sure!

I'm like this! I was much better, more confident, until I had a nightmare headteacher who basically bullied me. When I left and started my new teaching job I had big issues worrying about the work I was doing and thinking any moment someone was going to give me a dressing down. It took me a good two-and-a-half years to stop feeling that way. I'm starting a leadership role in September and I'm already worrying about getting things wrong!

So, no help, sorry OP. Just solidarity.

not really afflicted with stress… I do work probably too much though :/ very conscientious/ a swot

No kids, no partner and totally gave up dating over a year ago. My Mum says that's why I stress so much, just trying to cope wading my blind way through life with no support 🎻🙈

All that plus I am responsible for locking the site, we have paperwork audits constantly and security visits, and after hours visits to check we have done everything correctly. I triple check everything when closing up. If something ruins my 'flow' I have to start again. Then I worry about something I know realistically couldn't have done, like left money out of the safe, ALL NIGHT until i get in the next day. Having a day off is a nightmare thinking that my boss will get in contact to say you forgot to do this and I will lose my job. Exhausted!

I constantly feel drained from worrying about work 😢 I WFH mainly and I don’t work on Fridays. However, last Saturday I was having a lovely day in the garden with DS when I thought I’d quickly check my work emails. How I wish I hadn’t because there were a chain of emails from my team about something important that I’d missed. These emails went back and forth, copying in more people each time. It completely ruined my weekend and put me on edge, dreading Monday. Come Monday, my boss phoned me first thing and wanted to know what happened etc …. lovely start to the week!

I constantly fuck up whereas no one else on the team seems to. I’m working on 2 projects which I feel massively out of my depth on and the year long deadline is looming for them to be signed off. My heart is in my mouth most days - ridiculous way to live.

CBT reallllyyyy helped. Talk to your GP about a referral or even go private. Your sanity is worth the money!

Yup - I sometimes just fantasise about getting a job in the shop down the road just so I don't have to constantly live up to my own impossible standards and can forget about work when I leave! Then I remember I could just as easily angst about working in a shop - worry about people who don't seem to like me, about politics and systems. Sigh. Maybe it is in some of us to feel we can only function on high levels of cortisol. Not healthy.