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5 year old threatened 6 year old brother with knife

6 replies

Rocketflowers · 27/06/2023 23:23

Looking for advice on next steps here.

I went upstairs this evening and had left my children downstairs watching TV. I suddenly heard screaming and ran downstairs to find my youngest holding a sharp knife and pointing at my eldest. I grabbed it off him and took anything sharp out of the drawers and put them away and out of reach. I comforted my eldest and took the youngest upstairs to talk about why he did it. His explanation was that his brother wasn't being nice to him.
Some background info. He's been talking a lot about death and keeps hitting and kicking the dog, despite many warnings. He hasn't hit him really hard but it's obviously totally unacceptable.
We found a dead bird today though and he seemed genuinely sad and seemed to show empathy so he's not totally devoid it it.
He also bites us and hits us every day. This all sounds horrifying of course but on the other side, he's doing well at school and is advanced in reading and writing but doesn't always engage in conversations according to his last report and is more reserved by nature.
He can be incredibly affectionate and loving and I am with him.
We had a very tough time through the lockdowns. I didn't cope at all and only just about managed to sustain them. My mental health was in a bad state and I still suffer with a lot of emotional dysregulation although somewhat improved now. I'm also in the process of an ADHD diagnosis.
Where do I start with this? He's clearly a very angry little boy and I have failed him as a mother but I hope there is time to repair and support him to be in a better state of mind. I'm extremely worried right now.
Their dad is pretty disinterested and sees them about once a fortnight for a few hours. I do everything, plus work. I messaged him about the incident and he read it and didn't even reply - this is typical.

OP posts:
MeinKraft · 27/06/2023 23:29

Sorry that this has happened. I would take him to the GP; try to source some private counselling if possible; ban any video games or tv shows with any violence at all; never leave the two of them alone together and rehome the dog.

LavanderSmellsLovely · 27/06/2023 23:44

Think about play therapy for him and his brother. It sounds as if there is a lot going on and professional help may be needed.

Orders76 · 27/06/2023 23:54

Second to play or talk therapy, it's a safe space and somewhere they should get some specific attention for issues, really helped one of mine.

Rocketflowers · 28/06/2023 07:53

@MeinKraft @LavanderSmellsLovely @Orders76

Thank you all. I'll be looking into all suggestions asap.

OP posts:
WhenIWasAFieldMyself · 28/06/2023 07:55

As above, and also consider rehoming the dog.

Sammi83 · 28/06/2023 08:42

Just to say hope youre alright sounds like a horrible shock

Over summer can u get the adhd one out half or full days doing any cheap sport football tennis etc ? Mine with adhd is much much worse without structure in summer hols and exercise calms him down. Thinking may get worse over summer

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