Looking for advice on next steps here.
I went upstairs this evening and had left my children downstairs watching TV. I suddenly heard screaming and ran downstairs to find my youngest holding a sharp knife and pointing at my eldest. I grabbed it off him and took anything sharp out of the drawers and put them away and out of reach. I comforted my eldest and took the youngest upstairs to talk about why he did it. His explanation was that his brother wasn't being nice to him.
Some background info. He's been talking a lot about death and keeps hitting and kicking the dog, despite many warnings. He hasn't hit him really hard but it's obviously totally unacceptable.
We found a dead bird today though and he seemed genuinely sad and seemed to show empathy so he's not totally devoid it it.
He also bites us and hits us every day. This all sounds horrifying of course but on the other side, he's doing well at school and is advanced in reading and writing but doesn't always engage in conversations according to his last report and is more reserved by nature.
He can be incredibly affectionate and loving and I am with him.
We had a very tough time through the lockdowns. I didn't cope at all and only just about managed to sustain them. My mental health was in a bad state and I still suffer with a lot of emotional dysregulation although somewhat improved now. I'm also in the process of an ADHD diagnosis.
Where do I start with this? He's clearly a very angry little boy and I have failed him as a mother but I hope there is time to repair and support him to be in a better state of mind. I'm extremely worried right now.
Their dad is pretty disinterested and sees them about once a fortnight for a few hours. I do everything, plus work. I messaged him about the incident and he read it and didn't even reply - this is typical.