moving areas once kids grown up

[pengin]

Both on MN and in RL I've heard a lot of people discussing moving away once their kids are grown up. But how many people actually do it and how easy is it to do that and find new friends and social circle. We currently live in London and lots of people talk about moving away once DCs are older. DH also considers doing that. I am a bit apprehensive as it feels rather daunting. Any RL experiences here?

Yes. To another country. On my own. Logistics weren’t easy or straightforward but making friends, getting involved in things once I was there was very easy.

I know quite a few that have and we’ll be doing it in a few years once our youngest has finished school. We’ve already bought the house in the new place so it’s just time now. I’m sure we’ll meet new people but some of our friends are spread out across the UK and some are in other countries anyway. We’ve made a bigger move previously, before we had children and that was great so I’m not worried, just looking forward to it.

I'm in London with grown up DC and I am staying put. I think mainly because I'm single (and planning to stay that way!). I don't want to go and start again on my own. I like the convenience of London. I like that I have multiple airports in easy reach, so easy to travel. I have a decent hospital 5 minutes away! Plenty of free/cheap activities I can get involved in when I retire. There is a small part of me that sometimes wistfully thinks about a little cottage in the country but I know I wouldn't like the reality. But then I grew up very rurally and I still remember well how isolated it felt.

My DM moved away then moved to be closer to us last year (we relocated for work). She had moved to her favourite UK holiday destination that she had been to at least once a year all of her adult life. Despite being friendly and outgoing she struggled to make any meaningful friendships and felt quite isolated. I'm sorry to say that the locals were quite insular and she wasn't really welcomed even though she made a decent effort.

She missed having a close bond with her grandchildren, we visited her once a year for two weeks which is all finances and annual leave would allow. She spoke to DCs on the phone and visited when she could but thier bond is definitely stronger with her now she lives down the road.

I'm happy she is here, she seems much happier. Tbh I was starting to worry about the distance and any future health/care needs her and DSD may require.

I can't see that it would be particularly difficult but I have few friends so am not dependent socially on others. I live in London and don't have plans to move when dc are older. We chose the area we live because it has great resources for families but also for adults. The idea of living somewhere for 20+ years that you don't like because you think it's good for the children is a bit odd to me.

My parents did it and so have I )different reasons, they went together, I was divorced and met someone elsewhere)

We moved towns when the kids were almost finished High School. We had intended to wait until they left for Uni, but our dream home, on the sea front came up, so we went for it. We kept DC in the same High School though, and just sucked up the 30-40 minute school run for a few years. It's been very easy to make new friends. We know loads of people here now. We have been here 10 years. Kids have long since finished Uni, lol. Having a dog and being out walking helps!

I think with London, it's often more that people live here for work and then at retirement other options become possible. And you can free up a lot of money if you own a house in London

Remember to consider how close you want to be to any future grandchildren. No guarantees as your DC may move away but I'm raising my children 5 mins from my parents and 15 mins from my dh's parents and I absolutely love it. My kids adore their grandparents and visa versa.

The idea of living somewhere for 20+ years that you don't like because you think it's good for the children is a bit odd to me.

I don’t dislike where we live currently, there’s lots of good things about it, we just want to try somewhere else. Priorities, needs and wants often change at different life stages, fairly common I’d say.

I like where we live but DH is think that we could try living by the sea and retiring early. I am just not sure how easy it will be knowing nobody. Then again a lot of our friends might also be moving away.

Yes, DH and I, now XH, moved in opposite directions once DD left France to work abroad.

We did it, classic downsizing to the fairly near sea bungalow. This was 11 years ago,last year, youngest DD and youngest grandkids followed, now 5 miles away. Other DKs are roughly an hour away on a good day
Have made local friends,and still see friends from last job and before that.