Totally OTT primary school 'leavers' celebrations

[irritatedandhotandsweaty]

Am I a crap mother because I really don't see this as an amazing achievement?

I just feel like for the last two weeks the whole class have been totally hyped up and there's been far too much talk of 'their journey' and 'being soooo emotional' and all of this nonsense of the prom. Thankfully we could afford it but it was ludicrous! Some of the girls had full make up and tans.

I think it's a lovely thing in secondary school but absolutely not in P7.

I’m not sure why a bbq is a hoo ha I had one (44) so quite a few years ago. It’s a hooha if it’s made to be one. They have a class waterfight too. No one is riled up into a frenzy it’s just some nice activities to mark the end of primary school. No sobbing or any of that shit, this one is the last of my 4 boys to finish primary school no frenzy seems some places go a bit ott they all run out on the last day happy to start holidays a week to go can’t wait!! Will not miss school run one bit

This is what our school did. It happened at the end of each school year, it was for the whole school. Disco with DJ in the school hall, coloured flashing lights and a disco ball, a classroom was set up as a shop selling sweets and drinks. It was enough.

Secondary school was the same cake, radio, chatting in the form room all day which happened at the end of each school year. Except we got a little emotional because the GCSEs had been stressful, we knew it was the end of an era and we wouldn't see half these people again (not everyone was returning to do A-Levels, some were getting jobs and some who were staying in education were going to college). The trend, which not everyone took part in, was to get the school uniform shirt you were wearing signed by everyone. Some people brought cameras (nobody had a mobile phone) and took pictures. We really didn't need a prom etc.

I agree with this.

By the time a baby is born these days there's been a "gender reveal" (urgh) and a baby shower, and a pre baby moon, and then the baby arrives and there's another round of celebrations. Near me increasing numbers of people are now having massive 1st birthday parties with balloons in a large number etc.

Everything is for Instagram. Everything is expensive and mostly disposable.

I'm so glad my kids didn't have any of this at primary, they had a BBQ and a families Vs yr 6 rounders game in a field. I would have absolutely hated getting involved in a prom type affair. I personally think it is all too much at yr 11 too - loads of posts on local FB groups at the moment seeking expensive dresses, alterations, hair and nails and fancy/outlandish transport. I'm not sure what it teaches young people who have never yet earned their own money.

I agree. It’s ridiculous & completely over the top. We should save it for real achievements that are worthy of celebration. We’re teaching them they’ve done something amazing, but actually they just went to school. Not a big deal 🤷‍♀️

Yes we have a graduation thing for our son who is starting reception in September. Ridiculous! X

Yes and this probably contributes to the lack of resilience being seen in this age group. I think it's so wrong to instill this unrealistic sense of entitlement when any normal part of life comes to pass. Many kids just can't handle it when they don't get immediate affirmation that they are amazing or if instant validation isn't forthcoming for groundbreaking beliefs. I think this leads to kids being pulled toward identity cults where they are encouraged to fit in by being fed OTT praise for having an opinion and then led toward being homogenised into a new identity where nobody can disagree. It's ridiculous frankly!!

I think our school have it about right. They get leavers hoodies. Have a leavers assembly for the rest of the children to say good luck/good bye. A picnic one afternoon on our field where they can invite their parents. Then a leavers disco/bbq again at school, so no pressure on dressing up.

Apart from the hoodie, doesn’t cost the parents anything.

Ours are having a leavers assembly, hoodies (heavily subsidised by school/PTA - £5 charge passed on to parents and "speak to the office" if can't afford that), and a garden party in the school garden. That feels about right.

I think it's nice to mark the occasion, but I don't like excessive sentimentality / freaking kids out about what a big deal it is; or excessive consumerism / money-wasting (balloon arches, chair covers); or inappropriately adult 'dressing up' - fake tans on girls of 10-11?!

I think it's very human to need a bit of ritual and ceremony, and I think secular societies are sometimes still working this out a bit.

I don't mind the celebrations up to a point - for them it IS a big deal etc etc.

But I do find myself rolling my eyes at all the "we'll never forget this" from the kids or worse, the "you've learnt all these amazing things that I hope you'll take into your life and look back on fondly in the future" from the teacher...

They're 11. Within 3 months they'll have moved on from all these friends and by the time they're 18 they won't even remember most of the teachers who taught them!

If you think it's ridiculous pull your kid out of it and don't go.

Nursery can be part of a child's life from babies at a few months old to 4/5. It's a big deal leaving their 'life long friends' and the staff who you'll have got to know over the few years who you trusted to look after and help raise you baby.

If you got take your kleenex!

Dd is y6 and the school has so much planned, I’m dreading all the emotions tbh! We had a list of events and there’s something every Friday, then in the final week they have ..

3 class performances of Matilda
leavers’ disco
day at theme park
leavers assembly

Also yearbooks and hoodies.

they’ve already had some leavers events - this is just for the final week!

Our PTA cover the cost of the P7 hoodies (which they get at start of term so they can wear them all year), the high school ties and the P7 disco so there’s no cost to parents which is great. Obviously some parents go all out on the outfits/hair/limos for the disco but can’t stop that I suppose.

My daughters school had an assembly, which was lovely, lots of songs, and artwork by each child.

All of the kids were given a scrapbook with examples of their work from each year of primary - I was so moved by that, she was my first and didn't know the school did it.

No prom or hoodies, just a day trip to an outdoor adventure centre.

My youngest’s school ordered hoodies early on in the academic year, and they went to a localish theme park a few weeks ago. They will have an assembly just before term ends. I can cope with that!

My middle child has just left senior school, who put on an assembly, and are staging a ‘prom’ in July. Prom is for all 22 of the year group, and is being held in a function room at a local university. It’s costing parents/carers nothing, and I think only one of the cohort is going all out. My son is pondering a new tee shirt, which has been driven by the fact he’s seen one he likes and any excuse for a new gag tee is glorious. 🤷‍♀️

I hate the suits/ball gowns/hair and makeup/fancy transport crap that seems to be permeating things.

I detest those nursery graduations.

When did the jewelled shirts for secondary leavers become a thing?

Ours have a water fight instead of a party or prom😂They also have a lovely leavers' assembly. It's plenty but nicely done. Disagree that leaving primary is no big deal and most people don't remember primary school anyway. I'm 40 and remember it incredibly well. Children spend a vast number of hours there - I think it is quite bizarre to think they'd have no emotional connection to it. Maybe in small village, single/half form entry schools where you're with the same children from nursery it has more significance though.

When it turns into Limos and proms it's not about the children.
It's the parents.

Yes a celebration is nice, leavers assembly or church service run by the kids. Awards .leavers hoodie. School disco okay but I guess you can't stop some parents being crass, what sort of person thinks its appropriate to hire a limo for a yr6 disco? I doubt they can afford it most people who could would save it for yr13.

Blimey, when I left Primary in 1990, we were all taken to the hall to sing ‘One more step along the road I go’. Then the Head wished us luck and bade us farewell. That was it. I think I preferred that.

I think it's ridiculous, you are moving schools that's all. Mine changed schools twice due to moving, i can't see what the big deal is (and due to change didn't do this craziness as new school had different changeover time.

Don't get the prom at 16 either, they go back in September!, neither of mine bothered going, dc2 went to the leavers ball at 18 though.

@noblegiraffe

But many haven't, mine went to 3 primaries.

It is very weird. We were more in the excited to move on camp so DS was bemused by the crying children and weeping parents on the last day.

His school didn't do a disco which was a big relief. Instead they hired some inflatables and had a bbq on the school field, it was much nicer.

DD was wildly excited to leave primary as she had a horrible year 6. It was very difficult to listen to her teacher whine on about how special they all were and how she'd miss them all when she had basically ignored my DD being bullied for the whole year. I happily told everyone who asked that DD was delighted to be leaving!

It’s ridiculous. We just got our shirts signed back in the early 90s.
Why everything has to be celebrated so lavishly is beyond me.

Mine got a "yearbook". Made by kids and school, not outsourced
First and last photo, favourite memories of each other, merits, funny events
Brilliant