Oh god, I think I really hate the sound of my own voice

[IDontReallySoundLikeThatDoI]

Hi,

Non serious chat really, I know there are terrible things happening in the world right now, so please don’t flay me alive for this. But….

I’ve just listened back to a voice note I left on my friend’s WhatsApp and I realised (not for the first time) that I fucking hate the sound of my own voice.

It sounds…a bit posh (I’m not posh, I’m state educated, parents had “regular” jobs etc.), it has a bit of a “little girl” intonation, a bit higher than I would like. Sometimes I have a bit of a subtle lisp. I’m 34 years old.

For comparison, maybe I sound a bit like the late Peaches Geldof (bless her).

When I hear myself (what I think I can hear in my head) I think I sound fairly neutral (not posh, but not colloquial either), I think I sound just like a regular person. I grew up in Brighton, the local regional accent is a bit cockney-like, but then slightly nasal at the same time. I don’t really sound like that.

Maybe I should have voice coaching like Margaret Thatcher did, to sound a bit more authoritative when I speak. But she sounded kind of weird anyway so that’s no good. If my voice was just slightly deeper, that would be an improvement I think.

I’m not a very self-reverential person IRL, I promise (I hope anyway). Not a selfie taker or social media butterfly/ influencer type (not that there’s anything wrong with being those things), it’s just this happens to get on my nerves a bit. Maybe it doesn’t align with my self perception of myself, and I find it slightly jarring.

Oh well. I have a voice at least, so that should be enough. And my partner says he likes it, so that’s nice. Sorry for this pointless post.

Anyone else just hate the sound of their own voice though? If so, why?

TY!

This is very common, because what we think is OUR voice, actually isnt what other people hear at all.

What we hear is full of reverberations from our own head, so it sounds lower, in frequency, than it does to the outside world.

Thanks @ASGIRC Sure, sure I get that (and probably should have mentioned that in my OP) but it the then hearing what everyone else hears (from a recording) I really struggle with.

I guess I’m being a bit reflective as my baby is due next month so I’m probably thinking more about who I am as a person, and how my LO will perceive me (love me unconditionally I know, regardless of whether I sound like a plonker or not, lol)

x

OK I’ve just read another v similar post to mine, and seems like this might be a bit of syndrome (you get me) anyway.

So in conclusion, given this has already been addressed here my OP is a bit redundant 😂

Oh don’t worry, this is normal I believe.

I sound a complete tit when I hear myself- I think I’m chill and normal but I’m actually a squeaky, posh tit.

I deal with it by barely ever listening to myself.

Best get the navel-gazing in now before your child is born I guess, you won't have time after.

I once accidentally recorded myself singing ‘There’s a tiny caterpillar on a leaf’ to a class of Year 1 children when I was teaching. How those poor bairns were not traumatised for life I do not know. Your voice sounds like a nice one OP.

I detest the sound of my own voice. Hearing it on a recording is like torture. I sound so nasal, posh and common at the same time...manly and girly at the same time. Its utterly hideous. I pray I don't sound like that in real life because it makes me never want to speak again.

I also hate my voice on recording playbacks, I sound really young (I'm not). I wished I looked as young as I sounded.

Oh god me too. I'm much higher pitched, sound much younger than I am.
My regional accent is mild but much more noticeable than normal....

To make things worse I seem to be nominated a lot to do the voice of promo videos or recorded presentations so I have to hear myself a lot. We also often record meetings and I have to review these too...
It doesn't get better I cringe every time.

@shropshirewitch I know I know, I’m bored what can I say 😂

@Mamette we‘re in the same club then!

I‘m sureyou have a lovely voice too, and your year ones appreciated it 😊

I feel the same.
If it helps, when do you ever come away from talking to someone and think that they have a not nice voice?

Everyone does! I had to record some training for another deployment recently, I cringed myself inside out and did it 3 times over but still sounded like a little girl. I’m 41!

@MichaelAndEagle

To make things worse I seem to be nominated a lot to do the voice of promo videos or recorded presentations so I have to hear myself a lot. We also often record meetings and I have to review these too...

aw, well other people must like it! They think it works for your company‘s image, sounding professional and so on…validation! 🙂

@Comedycook oh man, sorry to hear this. I also feel if I could not speak again it might be a blessing! Haha

@CindersAgain very true! I hadn’t really thought of that 😊

Most people cringe a bit on hearing their own voice. Life is way too short to get so hung up on it though. Your voice is what it is. You are overthinking.

Argh yeah, I know what you mean. Have done a couple of webinars for work and listening back to them is always a struggle.

Im just a tech writer, that’s the beauty of it. Speaking without really speaking…

@peachicecream I know you’re right

Weirdly I hve similar issues with my voice. It feels quite deep, centred and neutral. When I hear it, it sounds breathy, childlike and as though I'm a social climber desperate to sound posher than she is - quite affected and mannered. Really pisses me off.

But we have to work with what we have. Inside I am also a tall, willowy, natural woman. In reality I'm short, stocky/chubby and if I don't wear makeup people ask if I've been unwell.

I have a colleague who has a voice like an eleven-year-old boy on the cusp of puberty. To compound it, she lived in Australia for years so she also has a hybrid accent and a terrible, the worst, case of rising infection at the end if sentences. I flinch in meeting when she speaks. I often turn the sound off.

Inflection.

I am middle aged and from inside my head I sound like a normal woman.

When I hear a recording of my voice played back, I sound younger, more RP and prissier. Like I'm auditioning for Mallory Towers or as an ingenue in a Merchant Ivory film. It makes me wonder how anyone takes me seriously when I speak.

Went to see Queen last year, there is a video of me singing bohemian rhapsody...... that baby is NEVER being made public!!! Wow, my voice!! 🤣

It’s rare though 😂