Sick of the drama

[sickofthe]

That comes with having an alcoholic in the immediate family.
Why can't they just admit the issue they have ? Why do they have to have ago at everyone in their life ? Cause constant drama and fall outs with people, attacking people on nights out, causing trouble and getting themselves involved in stuff that has absolutely nothing to do with them ?

I've been dragged down today, hence the rant. I won't go onto details but your sibling should support and praise you, not try to drag you down into their hole

I hear you. I have a close family member who has suddenly decided that I am the root of all their issues. They don't seem to be able to clarify exactly what I have done, but whatever it is, I have done it.
It's very draining and apart from ignoring it, there's little you can do.
My family member needs proper professional help, has plenty of money but refuses to pay for it

It's because they can't bear the idea of accepting personal responsibility, and creating discord gives them an excuse to self medicate with alcohol. The benefits system enables it, giving any kind of addict cash payments when you know they have their addictions is unhelpful. Sorry you're having to deal with this OP. All you can do is protect yourself by removing yourself from the situation

Definitely! The sad thing is we have no control over what others say and do - they will continue to display poor behaviour ..

however, at the same time, it is easy to be dragged down into their hole (as you say). What can you do to become more detached from them? This behaviour does generate a reaction within those close to them but, to maintain our own wellbeing, we may need to find ways to dismiss their stuff and focus on what we can do

it’s tough for you - bless you

Oh yeah, they always play the victim and can never accept any responsibility for anything.
It's just so draining, I used to really try and hit it home what they were doing, the hospital visits, ss involvment at the time, none of it was normal but it was never their fault. Always someone else. Always an excuse.

I made a mistake of thinking I could trust them with a personal issue, now it's being used against me. At this point I have no choice but to walk away and let them carry on drinking themselves silly

Yes, my family member needs professional help too but won't get it. What can you do, nothing !

I’m sorry you are struggling with this op. It sounds like you have done everything you possibly can and it’s time to step away for your own sanity and set a firm boundary.

Are there dc involved? If so, it might be an idea to provide an open line of communication with them but not your sibling.

I get that it is impossible, exhausting, frustrating, unfair, infuriating etc etc to deal with but pretty much all addicts are drinking or taking drugs because they are trying to get away from some personal pain, some reality they cannot face, some inner turmoil of some sort.

Many addicts have undiagnosed mh conditions or personality disorders for which they have not received adequate help.

They didn’t set out with the intention of becoming addicted or causing issues for everyone else. I agree though that once the addiction is established, the cycle of drama is a way of enabling the addiction to continue. Very painful for all.

Do you have any support yourself? From Al Anon or a counsellor perhaps? If not, this might be a good time to get some help for yourself. 💐