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Original poster

Did you buy your house with your head or heart?

61 replies

FrostingfromaSpoon · 12/06/2023 14:54

Hi,

We're currently considering moving house and have viewed a few houses to see if it's worth going on the market, so very much at the beginning of the process.

I've seen some very nice houses, in budget, nice area, little compromises, but for some reason they just haven't felt like home. Our current house very much does feel that way, but the area just doesn't. It's not a bad area, just dull. Saying that, as soon as I walked in the house it felt like home and we compromised on much more than we thought we would because of that feeling.

With all that in mind, I'm starting to wonder if for this move we should start listening more to our heads, given that we never really settled here because we didn't connect with the area - just the house.

Be interesting to hear your thoughts and personal experiences.

TIA

OP posts:
WaitingfortheTardis · 12/06/2023 17:11

Both, we decided we wanted older with a larger garden rather than a bigger shinier new build. We did make sure we found one that doesn't cost us too much to run/big problems on survey etc, but also we knew that despite loving our previous home we could never truly settle with all the noises of close neighbours around us. In the end we fell in love with our home and the garden it has.

Wildandwonderful · 12/06/2023 17:15

Heart - it was way beyond my sensible budget but I borrowed the extra money and bought it anyway. I am so happy I did as it is my dream home and I will stay here forever.

WateryDoom · 12/06/2023 17:29

Heart. Have never regretted it - although a great deal about it is not ideal. We focused on its size, character, lovely big garden and how quirky it was.

I compromised slightly on location - and actually a lot of that isn't ideal. Next time we think we'll focus on location and try and adapt the house for us.

So we might go head next time. But we've lived here 20 odd years quite happily, having fallen in love with it.

PurplePear7 · 12/06/2023 17:31

Head - I knew I couldn’t get my dream place so I had to be sensible and compromise on aspects.

But I am only early 30s so I hope one day I will be able to buy with my heart!

FuglyHouse · 12/06/2023 17:35

Head. We needed a house in a particular location but had a limited budget. It's actually worked out well and we're happy here but I will have no regrets about moving on when the time comes. My username tells you what I think about our house.

Tipintorecession · 12/06/2023 17:41

Heart 💯

350 year old cottage, walked through the back door and knew I belonged here. House feels like a member of the family. That was over 20 years ago and we are currently renovating it all as crumbling around us. I still love it despite the money pit it is! I want to be taken out in a box although it's massively impractical and cannot imagine a senior person navigating it!

user1471538283 · 12/06/2023 17:47

For my searches I had some non negotiables. My most favourite house was all heart. I just knew I loved it. And I did for 15 years.

The next one I didn't feel anything. But I needed to move and it was a bit rushed. The most expensive and worse mistake I've ever made but that wasn't just the house but the whole process and then the awful neighbors.

Consequently it took me years to get this one and again it felt right. A winter storm was brewing and it just felt happy. I'm very happy here despite things needing doing.

Silverribbons · 12/06/2023 17:47

Head. I didn't love and still don't love the house but we had a limited budget and it was the best we could afford in the area we wanted for school, commute, amenities etc. I hope to live in a house I absolutely love before I die!

HappyHolidai · 12/06/2023 17:48

Both: very lucky.

It's a beautiful old cottage with quirks. But it's also a 3-bed semi with a very practical layout and an excellent location.

ArcticBells · 12/06/2023 17:51

Heart. The purchase fell through twice before I bought it and I wish I'd got the message. Right house; wrong location.

Isthisblocked · 30/06/2023 19:59

Head. My accepted offer on a house I bought with my heart fell through because seller had not applied for probate and the delay was too long. I subsequently offered on a house I bought with my head. Looking at it one day with a friend she said “many an arranged marriage works out better than a love match”. I have been living in my “arranged marriage” house now for 15 months and the building work is almost complete to bring it up to date. The love match house would have been disastrous and this is a far better location and altogether better choice for me. I am so happily settled here in the house I bought with my head. I wouldn’t change now.

DanceMonster · 30/06/2023 20:03

Heart, and I regret it. I should have been more practical. Now we’re in the wrong area, and with interest rates the way they are we can’t afford to move.

Orangello · 30/06/2023 20:05

Heart. wasn't even planning to move for at least a few years but saw THE house. We still love it and it has doubled in value so no regrets.

ohfook · 30/06/2023 20:23

Head. We viewed four houses that would've been an option. The one we eventually bought was my least favourite but out of the other three one (my absolute favourite) needed a significant amount of money put into it to make it habitable, one had things about it that looked fab but were unsafe for toddlers and one was being sold by a divorcing couple and it was clear one half of the couple was dragging their feet and didn't want to sell at all.

Despite being my least favourite of the four, our was clearly the best option for our family in that it was safe, wouldn't bankrupt us and the seller was ready to go. I still look at the other ones in my Rightmove saved list and the one with the divorcing couple still hasn't sold.

ChickenMacaroni · 30/06/2023 20:30

For me I wouldn't get "heart" without "head". I'm very practical. Each house we've bought has been to solve a problem - first house we needed somewhere with regular buses throughout the day and night, second house we needed a house within a very particular area of about 200 houses (by some miracle we actually had the pick of 4 houses at the time), and this current house was a no brainer as we needed lots of bedrooms for tiny money.

Like with men I have never fallen in love with something wildly unsuitable. . If you were to cut me open I'm certain the word "sensible" boring would be written through me like a stick of rock.

Ladyoftheknight · 30/06/2023 20:43

Head, then renovated with my heart. You buy a house not a home, it doesn't have to feel like you yet

Rummikub · 30/06/2023 20:52

Head for location.
heart for the one we viewed and offered the same day. We had viewed about ten houses and none felt right. As soon as I walked in I felt it was the right place.

honeyfox · 30/06/2023 20:58

Head. It was on a new estate being built and was about two rows of bricks up when we bought, moved in 6 months later. I wasn't happy, I'd had a miscarriage about a week before we moved in and was all over the place. Five years later I am happy enough, it was in the exact location we wanted in a lovely town we already lived in and only ten minutes from work. I wouldn't rule out moving again in the future though.

Floribundaflummery · 30/06/2023 21:31

Always bought with time constraints for jobs but this last time took a year to find our house with a very detailed essentials list. It met all the criteria except our top one but felt so incredible right away when we first viewed that we went ahead anyway. So heart for the actual house and both for location. The garden is my absolute happy place and I have been thankful for it every single day.

Redlorryyellowlorryblue · 30/06/2023 21:34

Mostly head and a bit of heart. I was pregnant quicker than expected and we needed to move out of the city. There weren’t many properties available and this was the best of them. Good location and it ticked many boxes.

Probably paid about £25k more than we should have and initially it didn’t feel like home, but we’ve just renovated and now it does.

Herecomesthemoon · 30/06/2023 21:39

Heart for my first house. We saw several all similar and suitable but that one just felt right. Head for the second house when we needed to upsize - it was the only house we found that matched location, size and price - but never really liked it and missed the old house. I'm now back in a heart house, having downsized. I saw others similar and suitable but just liked this one.
I am a practical person and would not consider something impractical that felt good, but learnt that a house that meets your criteria, but you don't like will never be quite right.

BeverlyHa · 30/06/2023 21:44

I like old fashioned interiors, so for me old always do, if not, i will wallpaper it, bring in the old furniture and pray continuously for any other issues

garfieldeatscake · 30/06/2023 22:18

Heart, big mistake! Totally impractical and it's a bastard to heat.....although it's very cool in summer, so I guess that's one thing going in its favour! But it's thatched, dark and rooms tiny. Chocolate box pretty, and hundreds of years old, not listed thank goodness, but still really impractical for modern day living. And because of its construction very expensive and hard to remodel. Also due to its age it's impossible to replace anything, so everything has to be purpose built (recently had to get new window frames) they had to be commissioned as no chance of buying off the shelf. The house needs to 'breathe', which of course causes problems with modern day building regs /requirements, blah blah blah!
I miss my Victorian semi, which was much more spacious, easier enough to replace bits and pieces and much easier to keep clean and tidy!
I would never, ever go for heart over head ever again.

Youcanpayit · 30/06/2023 22:22

Head. I was heavily pregnant and we couldn't afford to stay where we were due to circumstance so had to move asap. It was the only house that ticked the boxes of affordability, parking, 3 beds and a garden. I've tried over.the last 8 years, but it's still not quite Home.

blueshoes · 30/06/2023 22:26

Heart to unlock but head has the casting vote.