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Would this bother you? Or am i being precious?

55 replies

PitYacker · 11/06/2023 13:34

New next door neighbours, middle aged couple but have grandchildren there a lot, like weeks at a time as they live in a different part of the country.
The lad, all through the half term holiday, would throw his football backwards over his head and into my garden on purpose, repeatedly. So he had to come in repeatedly to retrieve it. Annoying, but i let it go.

This morning he came in my garden to use as a hiding place from his sister. No ball involved. Just using it as an extension to his grandparents garden! He was mooching about round the bush by my front window, where birds are nesting, then he came up to my window, cupped the sides of his face then peering right into my living room.

Am I unreasonable to find this really intrusive? I understand there will be people telling me to get a grip and they really wouldn't get worked about minding their own business in their own house while an 11 year old boy was pressed up against the window watching you, am i being too uptight to let this bother me? I am a private person anyway...

OP posts:
Maddy70 · 11/06/2023 16:43

Yanbu. Tell him he can't come in

MagicBullet · 11/06/2023 16:47

Speak to your NDN.
Put a lock in the gate for the back garden.
Tell him off each and every single time he is in your front garden.

You’ve been too nice for too long, not stated boundaries and now he thinks it’s ok to behave that way with YOUR garden

HarrietJet · 11/06/2023 16:48

YaWeeSkitter · 11/06/2023 14:23

I would wait until he did it again , preferably going near your window, open the front door and screech , 'why are you looking through my window ' as loud as you can.
It should scare the living daylighhts out of him. He has no excuse and when his grandparents come out to see what is happening you can tell them you thought it was a peeping tom as you saw only a male face at your window. You will be flustered which they can interpret as he has alarmed you .
If they dont come out you can then march round with the same complaint. I bet they leave him to do what he wants to occupy himself outside and its preferable to him teasing his sister.

This one is good.

FoxtrotOscarFoxtrotOscar · 11/06/2023 16:50

Once when boys were throwing snowballs at my window, I pretended to take their photo on my phone. They stopped!

BleakMostly · 11/06/2023 16:53

I don't understand why you didn't speak directly to him there and then. We have neighbours opposite who let their children roam with no supervision, and one of their games is knock and dash. When they did it to my house, I ambled over to where they were hiding and asked them to stop. Simple. I now wave at them and they stop other kids from doing the same to our house because we're on speaking terms.

Just speak to the child and explain good neighbour etiquette.

LeroyJenkinssss · 11/06/2023 16:55

When he did that what did you do? I’d have been out that door like a shot giving him a telling off! The very next time he comes round, go out and take him back round and have a word with the grandparents. Honestly you’ve been far too patient

Justalittlebitduckling · 11/06/2023 16:56

No you’re not being precious. I found with my neighbours’ kid, that he kicked a ball over by accident a couple of times and I was nice about it. Then he started doing it on purpose. Then I found him and a friend just playing in my garden. So I confronted them a lot more strictly and said, “boys, what are you doing in MY garden?” and one of them said they were looking for a ball, and I told them they needed to be more careful and I haven’t seen them since. I wasn’t mean, just assertive.

pinkyredrose · 11/06/2023 16:57

Tell the little idiot to get the fuck out of your garden and stick a knife in his fucking ball if it comes over again.

IglesiasPiggl · 11/06/2023 16:58

pinkyredrose · 11/06/2023 16:57

Tell the little idiot to get the fuck out of your garden and stick a knife in his fucking ball if it comes over again.

A bit of an over reaction don't you think? Most people would opt for the discussion route before resorting to swearing and vandalism.

HarrietJet · 11/06/2023 17:00

pinkyredrose · 11/06/2023 16:57

Tell the little idiot to get the fuck out of your garden and stick a knife in his fucking ball if it comes over again.

Really??

LittleBlueBrioTrain · 11/06/2023 17:00

I'd be waiting under the window ready to pop up with a Scream mask on. Or at the upstairs window with a bucket of water.

Gymmum82 · 11/06/2023 17:00

Yanbu. I used to live in a flat with a young boy next door 6 or 7 at the time who would constantly peer through our windows. Used to drive me mad. Then once on a hot day I left the back door open (ground floor communal garden) went to the loo came back in to the lounge and he was standing in my lounge having a good look round!

MzHz · 11/06/2023 17:04

NoSquirrels · 11/06/2023 13:56

Speak directly to the boy and tell him off!

THIS! Just get him told and give him the shock of his life if he thinks he can just mooch about someone else’s garden like that

you’ll be doing him a favour!

Throwncrumbs · 11/06/2023 17:07

Girl used to stand by my gate making my dogs bark, politely told her to go away, stop teasing dogs…repeatedly every other day. Got so fed up with it. One day in a really bad mood I opened the window and shouted ‘FUCK OFF’ not my proudest moment but she never did it again!

2bazookas · 11/06/2023 17:07

Confiscate every football. Tell him they will be returned when he goes back home. or
Burst the footballs and throw them in the road to get run over by a car.

Tell boy "Stay out of my garden and stop being a nuisance, or I will tell your grandparents." If that doesn't work:

Tell his grandparents he's being a nuisance and harassing you.

whatausername · 11/06/2023 17:09

One word: boundaries.

Sarahtm35 · 11/06/2023 17:09

No I wouldn’t stand for that. I would go and have a respectful word with your neighbours and ask them to teach their grandkids some manners.

Alighttouchonthetiller · 11/06/2023 17:11

There are some very troubling and weird responses on this thread.

Just tell him, next time. Open a door/window and say politely but clearly, 'Please don't just come into my garden.'

If he persists, then speak to his grandparents. There's no need for stabbing footballs and screaming obscenities like a lunatic.

pinkyredrose · 11/06/2023 17:11

IglesiasPiggl · 11/06/2023 16:58

A bit of an over reaction don't you think? Most people would opt for the discussion route before resorting to swearing and vandalism.

Maybe. I've got rather a short fuse with pisstakers who are old enough to know better.

LaMaG · 11/06/2023 17:17

YANBU as others say just deal with neighbours first then you can approach him if it happens again. I suggest you do this soon when in a relaxed state rather than waiting till he annoys you again and go in all guns blazing. I've no doubt GPs will be apologetic and talk to him and that's the end of it.

FindingMeno · 11/06/2023 17:41

Just speak to the grandparents.

Mirabai · 11/06/2023 17:50

Tell him to stop OP he’s 11.

Shoemadlady · 11/06/2023 17:54

Why not just lock your gate? Problem solved

LizzieVereker · 11/06/2023 17:55

Just tell him to stop! 🤷🏻‍♀️

SistersNotCisters · 11/06/2023 18:46

"OI! BUGGER OFF AND DON'T COME BACK INTO MY GARDEN!" Should do the trick.