I was extremely close to a local mum whose son is friends with my daughter since preschool.
Our children ended up at primary school together. My friend started constantly complained about teachers, school, the PTA and curriculum. Then my daughter who is an only child, she started quipping she's spoiled. This mother was privately educated abroad and is from another country. She is constantly bitching about the UK and how she hates it here and makes racist comments unwittingly. I let it go but after sometime on a mums night out I called her out on it. No one said a word. She stormed off in a huff. The following week I went to her house and we talked. She tore my character apart saying in a group I'm too bubbly, I never complain or bitch on my family or tell off my child. My clothes are too smart, I make her feel bad about herself. She said my life is too perfect. I just took it as I can't bear the thought of school gate drama and glossed over it.
After a few months she joined the PTA, volunteers constantly at the school and has applied for a job there. She's become a high maintenance parent and the class busy body and totally changed. She's easily offended. I keep my distance.
Some months ago I asked her if she noticed in class my daughters behaviour as I suspected neurodiversity. She said no, she's just a classic spoilt only child. I had my daughter diagnosed shortly afterwards with a neurodiversity and her face was priceless. Again I keep my distance but am polite to her and her child but unfortunately she is so cliquey that those I'm friendly with she turns up a lot. It's tricky to hide from her.
I then lost my mother unexpectedly and she was wonderful. I thought she'd changed. Then I received a text message accusing me of upsetting her son by asking him to sign my daughter's class book. Apparently he didn't want to and she'd told me he didn't want to but I didn't hear her. Then I get another tirade of how perfect my life is. Again I apologise (just to appease her) but there is such a friction there.
Our children have 4 more years together and then secondary school. I feel I'm constantly treading on eggshells round her and her comments from a year ago have really affected me. I don't socialise with anyone there anymore. I've become self conscious. She's so orchestrating and present at every event or the occasional chat I attend and super nice to everyone I wonder why she's singled me out? How would you deal with it? It really hurts and I can't seem to stop carrying the hurtful things she said around. No one has ever spoken to me like that and that candidly and it's horrible.