Special visitor

[Getdowngetdown]

Last week DC piped up at the dinner table “oh dad when is our special visitor arriving?”, I was puzzled and momentarily thought maybe DH had agreed to dog-sit or his mum was coming down for a visit.
But no, ‘D’H has invited his nephew (21) to stay at our house for 2 weeks to do work experience at his workplace. I was not asked or consulted, although it seems the DC were informed.
I was a bit gobsmacked, as although we have a spare bedroom it is pretty inaccessible due to it being used for storage and to house pets, and the main problem being we have only one bathroom and 2 teens of our own. So aside from questioning whether or not it was a joke I kept schtum, and booked myself a holiday cottage an hours drive away. However this is only for a week and now I am trying to figure out what to do for the remaining week. I need to work (I work from home) but cannot now stand the thought of being in the house. Any suggestions??

I'd hit the roof.
Hope you're leaving all the prep to him?

If it's doable, I'd go and work in a library somewhere. Worth checking if their are private reading rooms you can book out.

At least nephew will be out the house during the day though.

I did indeed hit the roof - I pointed out that 2 nights would be fine but 2 weeks!! Absolute joke.
DH will have to do all prep as I am still in denial that is is even happening. In fact I was so unimpressed DH said, ‘well I’ll just tell him he can’t come then’, and I replied GOOD. As far as I am aware he is still coming but I plan not to be here at all if possible.
I have nothing against the special visitor he is a nice lad, but I don’t really know him and have met him only half a dozen times over our 20 year marriage.
I feel like I shouldn’t be the one who has to vacate my own home, it makes me want a divorce!

I'm not surprised, I can't believe he arranged all this without at least consulting you. No apology or anything?

Consider booking yourself a spa evening and few other lovely treats. If nothing else, it's a satisfying (if slightly petty) way to make your point.

Just Air B&B somewhere nice for the second week. You're great for just leaving them to it. I bet your dh assumed you'd be the one laying everything on for the visitor, it's a good lesson for him 😂

No apology at all in fact I think he thinks I am the one in the wrong! He doesn’t seem to see how it is a problem and is baffled as to why I’m even bothered. Arsehole.
yes I love the idea of air bnb for the rest of the week, although we live in a popular tourist destination so august is probably already fully booked or mega expensive..

Men never see what the problem is because they assume their wives/partners will take care of everything as we tend to end up as housekeepers. Stuff like clean bedding, extra food, cleaning, towels, room prep etc. won't even be on their radar.

I'd be annoyed but for it to make you consider divorce is a massive over reaction unless there are other problems as well.

The usual reaction to an announcement like this would be an AIBU- “I’m not reeeeally very happy about this, I’ll have to do loads of work to get the room ready and wait on another person for two weeks, DH won’t help, he’s annoyed with me, I feel so guilty about feeling like this, AIBU?”

How refreshing to see someone responding in the right way! DH has arranged to host his nephew, so he can go ahead and do just that.

Given you have pet and home-owner experience, I'd sign up to Trusted House Sitters and find somewhere to pet sit whilst WFH. (You will need references, very likely. Look for one reasonably close by so you can meet the owners in advance.)

Good for you OP. I also have a DH who doesn't consult me on anything even if it affects me.

Has he realised the spare room is full yet? Don't give him ideas of where he can move stuff if he asks "where should I put this?"

Our local premier inn type place have a deal where you can book a table to work at for the day that includes lunch and unlimited tea/coffee, power points to plug in lap top chargers etc. worth googling if you have similar in your area, DH pays of course.