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Original poster

If you use / have used the withdrawal method?

23 replies

freakedout87 · 09/06/2023 14:49

and you use it 'perfectly' each time ie no oops moments and you don't avoid sex completely during ovulation, have you ever got pregnant?

After having no suitable other contraceptive method and yes there is none I've even been to the complex contraception clinic, me and long term (nearly 20 years relationship) DP have been using withdrawal method successfully for the past 6/7 years. We have children who are teens.

DP withdraws properly every time, I have a relatively regular cycle and so I usually (but not always) avoid sex the days around ovulation altogether.

We only have sex about once a week, sometimes every 2 weeks past couple of years, although it did used to be more.

Anyway, we had sex on Saturday morning so just over 6 days ago, he definitely withdrew well on time as usual, but I was ovulating around that day. Since yesterday (so day 5 after) I just 'feel' different in some way, backache and boobs strange which I don't usually get until closer to period. Feels like more 'blood supply' around the pelvic area.

Tbh I am scared.

Have I just been lucky these past few years to avoid it..

Sorry for long post. I suppose just looking for experiences.

OP posts:

DustyLee123 · 09/06/2023 14:53

I have a nephew with SEN, his parent’s marriage broke down after his diagnosis, and they used the Russian roulette method too.

Summerishereagain · 09/06/2023 14:55

It can only used not around ovulating (probably tracked by temperature monitoring ever) day and even then when you are OK with getting pregnant. Otherwise it’s called trying to get pregnant.

BertieBotts · 09/06/2023 14:56

Don't ask this on here, you'll just get useless responses.

Any contraception method can fail. Withdrawal used properly is more effective statistically than condoms with typical use.

PMS symptoms can be uncannily similar to early pregnancy, especially if you're stressed.

Hope you get the result you want.

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Women's health

zombiefred · 09/06/2023 14:59

I'm 14 weeks pregnant from the pull out method, we only had sex one time that month and it should have been too early in my cycle and it took 3 years to conceive my now 7 y/o son so I thought we'd be fine but life finds a way and we're both happy about it now.

Original poster

freakedout87 · 09/06/2023 15:22

@BertieBotts Yeah I was thinking that perhaps the feeling weird could be due to the recent sunny weather. To be honest, I'd be conflicted. Part of me really wants another, but another part of me really, really does not as I have gynae problems which affect me enough (rectocele) which would likely be made worse by it, and I also had a termination many years ago (not whilst using withdrawal method) which I didn't realise beforehand would affect me so badly after to the point I still think about it multiple times a day.

@zombiefred Sorry for TMI, but could I ask, have you used the withdrawal method before? and did he definitely pull out on time? Congratulations on your surprise.

OP posts:

AlltheFs · 09/06/2023 15:25

We have used it for 10 years. No near misses. We stopped to conceive DD and restarted again. DH has a lot of control though “thanks” to a loss of sensitivity from a botched medical circumcision as a teen. Which I think adds to his success with it. He finds it very hard to ejaculate at times.

AlltheFs · 09/06/2023 15:26

Summerishereagain · 09/06/2023 14:55

It can only used not around ovulating (probably tracked by temperature monitoring ever) day and even then when you are OK with getting pregnant. Otherwise it’s called trying to get pregnant.

What a load of old shite. It’s highly successful used properly.

Saucepot1985 · 09/06/2023 15:34

Had been using the withdrawal method for two years prior to falling preg & now have a 3 year old!
TMI but my husband doesn’t usually finish as soon as he pulls out so I think my LO was conceived on a little bit that leaked out during.

It’s not a reliable method unfortunately 😂

EggbertHeartsTina · 09/06/2023 15:41

I used to use withdrawal combined with a period tracking app (the one where you take your temp every AM). We'd use condoms or abstain during and around ovulation. You have to use the app religiously so that you get a better knowledge of your body.

However it was during a period of time where I wouldn't have been too upset had I got pregnant. Nowadays I wouldn't risk it as I don't want any more children.

washingmachineheart · 09/06/2023 15:43

I’ve done this for about 7 years now, all throughout my cycle, along with taking a pregnancy test each month regardless of whether I bleed or not.

So far, so good. I don’t think it’s foolproof, I’ve accepted I may fall pregnant (although I accept this with pretty much any contraceptive), and hope the test will catch it if I do to schedule a termination ASAP.

I’ve tried multiple pills, the implant, a Nuvaring and condoms, none of which suited me, so have chosen this instead. The inconvenience of pulling out and potential pregnancy risk is preferable to me.

SunnySun1 · 09/06/2023 15:44

@freakedout87 you say there aren’t any suitable contraceptive methods for you… but the condom is hormone free and not invasive (unlike the copper coil). You shouldn’t use the pull out method whilst you’re ovulating. Also, you should be tracking ovulation because even with a usually predictable period you could ovulate earlier or later than usual.

Original poster

freakedout87 · 09/06/2023 15:49

@SunnySun1 DP can't keep an erection with condoms (we tried different types), so that in itself is a method of contraception!!

The combined pill suited me fine until medically I wasn't allowed to use it anymore.
I had coils (both types) and had trouble with them because of womb position and my sister had awful troubles too so I guess it's our womb position.
Anything progesterone only (and I have tried implant, different pills) turns me into a mad woman.

The only thing would be the snip which DP isn't completely sure he doesn't want any more dc.

OP posts:

mosiacmaker · 09/06/2023 15:50

I’ve used the natural method of contraception - so cycle and ovulation tracking, for 6 years with partner with no issues. But part of this method is also being aware of when your period is due and therefore knowing really soon if you do fall pregnant, in time to take the medical termination pills if you need. I wouldn’t use this method if I wasn’t ok with terminating and absolutely couldn’t have a baby.

Original poster

freakedout87 · 09/06/2023 15:51

If this time it turns out okay I will start using temp checking etc and avoiding it altogether during fertile time.

OP posts:

Retrain12345 · 09/06/2023 15:58

I used it as a method for 10+ years. It worked perfectly, I also managed to get pregnant on purpose twice as soon as we stopped.

Then one month I ovulated very late randomly and didn’t realise. DH pulled out as usual but I still ended up with DC3. Probably wouldn’t rate it much after that!

MyFaceIsAnAONB · 09/06/2023 16:02

MN hates the fact it can work just like any other contraceptive, so you’ll get skewed answers here. But it worked perfectly for us for 10+ years, we had 3 kids when we wanted them - ie we are very fertile and conceived first cycle three times, so goes to show it works ok as a contraceptive. Now we’re done and DH having the snip just like most men do once they’ve had their kids after years of any method of contraceptive.

bigTillyMint · 09/06/2023 16:03

I got pregnant with now DH 3 months after we met. Don’t risk it!

Hollyppp · 09/06/2023 16:19

we were avoiding sex during the fertile window and has sex once on like day 6/7. I normally ovulate day 15. Anyway we now have a 2.5 yo. I had to take 7 tests to convince me that I was pregnant as we had only had sex once that month…?!

anyway, I’m all for proper methods of contraception if you don’t want a baby (luckily we were okay with conceiving and planning a baby later that year)

Keitharingsbitch · 09/06/2023 16:23

Never been pregnant, I've been using it with my partner for about 17 to 18 years.

BertieBotts · 09/06/2023 16:30

I would def recommend learning about your fertile signs and natural tracking methods whether you end up using it for contraception or not.

My body is very, extremely, clear when I'm fertile - I produce so much gunk it's actually really inconvenient. But it does have its benefits in alerting me to be more cautious, I suppose!

We are using a combination of condoms and withdrawal currently, but saving up (not UK) for something more permanent, either copper coil or vasectomy probably.

Hollyppp · 09/06/2023 16:36

Keitharingsbitch · 09/06/2023 16:23

Never been pregnant, I've been using it with my partner for about 17 to 18 years.

Hmmm I’m not sure if that’s good evidence for it working. You or partner may have fertility issues but never known

SunnySun1 · 09/06/2023 16:54

freakedout87 · 09/06/2023 15:49

@SunnySun1 DP can't keep an erection with condoms (we tried different types), so that in itself is a method of contraception!!

I can’t use hormonal pills either and I refuse to opt for the copper coil as it sounds awful! Definitely try tracking your temp first thing every morning. Once you’ve had a couple of cycles you’ll see a pattern and figure out when you ovulate (you put the temps in a charting app). Read up on bbt tracking. If your dc are teens then is he sure he doesn’t want anymore babies? The snip would take pressure off you!

zombiefred · 09/06/2023 18:42

@freakedout87 Yes I’ve used the withdrawal method with all long term partners prior to my current partner, I was only with my current partner for 3 months before falling pregnant so tbh he’s probably the one to blame but I thought he had pulled out in time. I’m sure you’ll be fine if your partner pulls out in plenty of time and you avoid ovulation, after this baby is born we’ll probably either use condoms or try to be more careful with the withdrawal method and track ovulation better as I hate hormonal contraceptives

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