Is it possible to train or condition yourself not to be bothered by neighbour's thumping music?

[AwakeButTired]

I'm sure they’re having a nice time and they can hear the music, but all I can hear is bass. The summer is going to be ruined yet again by their noise and music.

I can hear it over the TV or radio or any other noise in the house. They will turn it down if asked, but it goes from really loud to still loud, but not as loud as before.

Has anyone trained themself not to be bothered by it? As soon as my ear tunes in to it, I can't tune out.

No :(

Have you tried noise cancelling headphones and playing your own music. The issue is if it vibrates the house.

Noise cancelling headphones are great
Might be worth asking a friend if they are as aware of the base as you are when you next have visitors.
Good luck

No and it’s the worst!

we have neighbours like this and it drives me insane. I have ADHD and sometimes noise (especially mutiple different things all at once) completely melts my brain. I snapped once and turned Alexa up to full volume, put her just outside the back door and put baby shark on loop and went out. Not my finest moment (I’m never never petty) but it seems to have done the trick as the noise has been turned down to a less intense level. Slightly embarrassed by my own behaviour but we all have our moments.

neighbours are vile for wiw.

As soon as my ear tunes in to it, I can't tune out.

That's because of the Reticular Activating System, the part of the brain which draws your attention to things your mind deems to be important and therefore you must pay attention to. That's why you can sleep through thunderstorms (unimportant) but wake immediately if your cat is making that awful pre-vomit noise!

Remedial hypnosis can stop you having that emotional response but probably cheaper to get some earpods and listen to your own music.

I was worried that headphones might be the only answer (but hypnosis sounds interesting). I can convince myself for a little while, but then I get so frustrated/ sad and angry about it.

Normal living noises from neighbours are ok, but not when it thrums through my house. Worst thing is is that the house was built after we moved in and then they built out their garden and have the music (and everything else) away from their own house, but nearer ours…. We tried to buy a house that had some distance between the neighbours.

It's so inconsiderate. I can’t retaliate because it would only cause more upset to the other houses that are around us.

I don’t mind building work/ talking/ gardening noises because they will stop at some point. But the music can easily be on all day.

Hard to complain as well because they do turn it down if asked (for about half an hour, then it creeps up to full volume again) and it stops at a ‘reasonable' hour… 11pm means it can have been going since midday…. They know how to creep around the rules and makes it more inconsiderate than if they were just ignorant 😢

Keep going round? CFs if they turn it down for half an hour only. It may be within the hours of 9 to 11 but it’s still water torture IMO. Are they owners or temporary tenants? Can you move?

The thrumming sound is awful. I feel sad for you too. You could check out the legalities of their noise intrusion via a solicitor but if they are resistant (and sounds like they are) I am not sure what else you can do except move.

That must be really frustrating. You bought your house on the basis on finding peace and quiet and then not only did another house get built close by afterwards but also the noise they are making is exactly what you were trying to avoid in the first place.

I know the noise is a real life issue but the perception is making it much worse. Imagine you'd bought a house close to a train line, busy road or flight path; you would have accepted the noise as an inconvenience that was worth it for the house/area you valued as being more important and, in a very short period of time, you would simply stop noticing the sound of the trains/cars/planes. If you can't reconcile the pluses that made you buy the house in the first place against the minuses for 3(ish) months of the year then it might be better to move (although hypnosis would definitely be cheaper!).

I tried both hypnosis and CBT for it. Made no difference, I would still have instant diarrhoea and vomiting from the stress. Heavy earplugs were the only thing that helped, a bit. Ruined my health for thirty years.