Child Custody - Splitting children

[Zyne]

Currently going through a divorce and trying to negotiate a child arrangement agreement. Applied for Child arrangement order, judge said, you two go back and try and negotiate.
14yr old has said he doesn't want to live with the mother at all, not even one night a week or else he will run away because mum is aggressive.
9yr old said she can only do a maximum of 3 days with the mum.
6 yr old too young to have an opinion.

1. Is it possible for my son to live with the father while the girls live with their mother during the week and only spend weekends with the father?
2. Is 9yr old's opinion taken into account?

Are you the father?

By the way, the mother wants full custody and for father to see them every other weekend even though the children have better relationship and stronger bond with father. No safeguarding concerns on father nor domestic violence.

Yes, i am the father.

You just go back to judge and tell them its impossible to reach a mutually suitable arrangement and set out DCs' wishes, your expectations. Your ex will do same and judge will take all this into consideration when deciding. But I think 50/50 is the most likely outcome

My concern is for my 14 yr old who doesn't want any overnight stay with the mother. Will the judge overlook his wishes? My son is very mature for his age and can't bare all the abuse father has suffered at the hands of the mother.

I'm.sorry but nobody can predict what the court will order.bof course make your solicitor/barrister/advocate aware of the kids' wishes , and they are presented to the court. If you have proof or police reports of the abuse, by all means produce that too so there's complete transparency

It's hard to say what the judge would decide. Hopefully they will be somebody who focuses on what the children have expressed they would like, I'm assuming he / she would also need to consider other factors such as who they'd be best supported by, financial background, support systems in place to help in these new circumstances etc but if the child has stated they will runaway if their wishes aren't met this puts a young person at risk which I believe a judge would do their best to avoid. We do live in a society that does favour women over men in general when it comes to children, but I hope the judge is able to be unbiased and simply work off on what the children would benefit most by and creates a safe space for their health mentally, physically , emotionally etc. If everything you say is true, hopefully it goes the way the children have said would make them happy. Wishing you all the best and I hope the children have their wishes met whichever outcome they'd like it go! Also do not forget to take care of yourself even in difficult situations. When a parent is suffering so do the children indirectly

The 6 year old isn’t too young to have an opinion, would you not gently explore their thinking (I don’t mean asking them to choose - that’s too much responsibility for a 6 year old), so you can consider their views? If you go to court, their views would be sought and considered so maybe better to do that before you get to that point?