Evicting adult children from our home/Englans

[Desperate2023]

Greetings
We need your help
We have looked up Google/Etc and beleive our 30+ year old child
can be evicted at short notice and have no legal right to be here.

This child of ours is very nasty with their mouth and has in recent months beeing calling my DH the C word and much much more and wishing disaters on us, More recently the child has started uing the same langue/threats etc against me and I have never sworn in my life.

Our child has worked sinnce leaving uni, lives rent free and a few years ago we gifted all foru of our childern varying amounts of cash . The abusive one which was not abusive when we gifted got the most money as they did not own a property it was close to 250 thousand pounds. They have their own saving, close to 200 thousand on top of that

This child is lying, recording and when we are not saying/responding making up lies etc. We have asked the child to leave as they are fit and able. The child was demanding money before they leave as property is expensive around where we live. The child has worked from home for close to ten years so could move anywhere in the uk.

I've said the above to stop people from taking thread OT

My question is what happens if the child refuses to leave? We will give them a week to four weeks' notice as the child will tease us about having to be dragged out and is saying is staying here to make us suffer because they feel we do not listen to this one at home but care more about the other siblings and their OH's/Grandchildren etc

So once I give the child a notice to leave and they can easily stay in a hotel, rent a room etc as they have more than enough cash and job and ability/car etc - what happens if they refuse to leave

We live in a very quite side road in modern houses where almost everyone can see the other's front doors etc. We are quiet people that keep ourselves to our selves and fear the backlash etc from our child at home then police having to evict them

What is the process and what needs to happen if they dont leave on that day

TBH, we want the child out today as they are setting my DH up and me and the more we ignore the child at times the child comes and sits right next to us and shouts in our ears and tells lies about us to my and DH siblings/family

It is our house and we are both recently retired and the behaviour is taking its toll. We have said to our child, get your own place, rent etc and once you have calmed down you are welcome to visit - just got more verbal abuse.

Btw. I can't see the edit button so need to add it is our own property and not the council/etc.

As we are not from the UK, our culture is different and the shame of this we are prepared to put up with but we ar worried what next to do if the child does not leave on the date given, is it simply calling the police and moving their things out without damage etc?

Do they ever leave the house? I would change the locks the next time they do. It's your house, they have our stayed their welcome it's not like they live independently in a house you own.

This is after you've served them the 4 weeks notice, I think you still have to do that.

Presume they don't have a tenancy agreement etc so don't see how you'd have to serve them notice?

If you’ve given reasonable notice and they don’t leave, you can peacefully evict them, such as changing locks. When he gets abusive, call the police. You don’t deserve to be screamed at in your own home.

look up “excluded occupiers”

Cheers. Yes the child goes out but rare as friends are driven away - all of our grandchildren love our child as do relatives and friends but they need to stay with our child for a week or so and disagree with them to get the vile side of them

We could lock the doors change the locks etc and put stuff out on to the drive but it is embarrassing as is calling the cops

Reading more of Google - we can just give verbal notice but will do written had delivered and email and then after the leave date, next time they go out, lock the house up and call the cops when they start making threats and I just know the child will then hve a panic attack and ambulance will be required - as all of the neighbours like our child as they are very friendly and I hardly talk to anyone and DH even less so as we keep ourselves to sleeves, it will be so hard facing them the finger points - we are desperate, sick

Change the locks when they go out. Pack up their stuff and put it outside and tell them to come and collect it. If they become violent, call the police. Ensure you have securely locked windows, gates etc. to prevent them breaking in. You might also need to fix up a camera to record any untoward events.

This

Let the neighbours poi t their fingers. They are not the ones getting abused in their own homes.

Change the locks. They are an adult with cash and resources. You have nothing to feel guilty about.

OP is your child unwell? Do they gave mental health problems? Are they taking drugs?
This is a horrible thing to happen in a family. Can it really not be achieved without lots of drama?

You need to call the police and tell them that this person is being abusive towards you and won't leave.

Move their belongings out to the front and change the locks.
End of story.

It might be worth talking to an organisation such as PEGS (https://www.pegsupport.co.uk/) who specialise in child to parent abuse. Or your local domestic abuse organisation so you can get some support. Citizens advice are your best option for advice about your and your child’s rights.

The only thing you can do is change the locks when they're out, put their stuff out ready to go and call the police to remove them when they try to get back in.

Or you can be miserable forever. It's up to you

You don't legally have to give them any notice. Just like if you had a partner or friend living with you in your home and wanted them to leave. You can just change the locks if you want, or call the police to remove them if they won't leave when asked. Be aware that if there's no risk of violence the police will put you down as a low priority and may take many hours to come.

But you might want to try to manage it smoothly by first telling them clearly that it's time they moved on and it's not good for any of you being under one roof. Agree a date when they'll leave and if they're willing to accept help, help them look for somewhere to rent.

Agree with others about changing locks when they are out. I would give child notice period if you haven’t already.

As for their stuff out on the street, can you leave it in a side alley or a shed or something if you don’t want the neighbours to see it out on the road all day?

also definitely get CCTV

If you wanted and had time, you could rent a storage unit and move the stuff there, giving the child the details.

Or just don’t put the stuff out and tell them they can arrange a date and pick it up then/you will drop it to their new location then.

I wouldn't worry about getting rid of their stuff just yet. Get your child to move out and tell them you'll look after their stuff for them until they're ready to pick it up. Realistically they will likely take a few weeks to find somewhere to rent, and it's not nice or necessary to be dumping possessions in bin bags outside the door just yet. Either you or DP may at some point want to build bridges again with them.

You need to speak.to a relative and ask them to invite this child over to see them. As soon as he is gone have a locksmith come and change the locks. Bag up their stuff and leave in the garden for them. Do not open the door to them. It is your home and you deserve to be content and peaceful there. Your son sounds very unpleasant towards you.

This sounds like a distressing situation. I know you aren't from the UK but it is odd that both you, and other people on this thread are calling this 30+ year old person a "child".

They are no such thing. They are a grown up adult, and as such nerd to take responsibility for their own actions.

Talk to them adult to adult expressing your concerns, serve them notice. Advise they will always be part of your family, but you need your home back now.

Good lord, this is for sure a bot.

@Scalottia

I think a bot would not have spelling mistakes though.

They're not - child. They're an adult, ask them / tell them
To leave.