Page 2 | What super power does your disability or condition brings you ? I have adhd

Nothingisblackandwhite · 2023-06-05T09:42:32+00:00

I know mostly we speak about the negatives of disabilities but what “ super power “ does yours bring you ? I have ADHD , it can make work harder or easier depending on the day . I work from home and manage my own team and I’ve been so hyper focused today that I did my days work by 10:30 ( started at 7 ) . Was about to progress to tomorrows work but decided against it as I have in the past had reminders not to expect others to work as fast as me . So I’m organising tomorrow work instead . My oldest has autism and he never forgets a place , we can be years and years without visiting a country and he will still know the way around streets and can always find a car in a car park .

CapitanSandy · 05/06/2023 14:43

TheReverendBeeb · 05/06/2023 13:44

Adding my voice to the dissent I'm afraid. As someone with a physical disability and constant pain, I am just getting through each day as best as I can.

The whole super power thing is akin to thinking that all physically disabled people could be paralympians IMHO. Sorry to burst your bubble OP, and please don't take it personally.

Completely agree!

fantasmasgoria1 · 05/06/2023 14:44

My husband and best friend would say and often do that I am good at carrying on no matter what and people don't guess how much pain I am in. But I don't see that as a superpower. I often don't show my pain as much because I don't want other people to know and feel sorry for me. I battle on and cry when I'm at home. I have physical disabilities now and I have had a mental illness since I was around 22. According to my care team i have autism and I actually dont disagree with that. I find pretending very tiresome.

blackheartsgirl · 05/06/2023 14:46

None. I have adhd. It’s wrecked my life.

2 of my dc have autism as does my dgd. It’s caused nothing but grief and heartache in our family

sorry Op,

Original poster

Nothingisblackandwhite · 05/06/2023 14:52

I did nit mean to offend anyone , I have a son with severe autism I do understand the struggles but even he has some amazing abilities . I’m just trying to stay positive and create a positive thread . I did not mean to offend anyone

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SouthCountryGirl · 05/06/2023 14:56

LovelyJublee · 05/06/2023 13:03

I don't talk about myself in terms as having a superpower but I don't think OP is being dismissive of the struggles disabilities and health conditions bring us, she acknowledged that we often speak of the negatives of disabilities and I got the impression she was highlighting some of the positives for herself and asking others what theirs are. I got the impression it was about lifting self esteem and not feeling shit about the things we can't do or massively struggle with.

And some conditions do make other skills stronger, I don't think celebrating or being proud of those little things are the same as saying people don't struggle a lot. I don't feel like I have a superpower, I feel like a useless and often worthless person a lot of the time due to my disabilities, doesn't mean others can't have a moment of celebrating something they've done well or are good at.

My stepdad lost his sight op, he had to rely on his hearing and other senses more and over the years became able to know when something had been moved slightly just by the echo. He could spot when my brother was lying by the way his voice echoed with head to the ground versus looking straight at stepdad. He could tell if my sister was cheating at a board game and moving six instead of three because he could hear the sound of her little counter being a further distance away than it should have been.

Would he say being blind is a superpower? No, not at all and he'd have given the world for his sight back, but doesn't mean he can't mention how his sense of hearing became his dominate way of navigating.

I'm both hearing and sight impaired so don't have the abilities your step dad has. But I've heard a lot of blind people saying the same - they rely far more on their hearing which means it's their way to navigate the world

FanFckingTastic · 05/06/2023 14:56

My son has severe ADHD. He literally can't sit still or concentrate on anything. Because of this, he's an amazing runner - has speed and stamina to burn, but also because of this he can't sleep at night because his body and brain are still on the go. He would 100% percent trade this very minor upside for a little respite from his nervous energy.

You hear that ND issues like ADHD are 'superpowers' a lot more now. Personally I think that it's incredibly damaging as it downplays how tough it is living with these conditions.

Original poster

Nothingisblackandwhite · 05/06/2023 14:57

Simianwalk · 05/06/2023 13:31

I'm with you OP. I find looking for the positives in my disabilities essential for trucking on I have a chronic autoimmune condition (over 25 years now), am bipolar and have ADHD. Whilst of course I'd like to get rid of all the fuckers I have definitely had some benefits. I am incredibly open-minded, several bouts of psychosis and months in mental hospital was very grounding and a good leveller. Psychosis whilst very hard (and destructive on my life) has been extraordinary in having in-depth thoughts.
During one manic episode I did a huge project that should have taken years but happened in months as my brain worked so fast.
The ADHD means I can multitask like a demon and hold down 3 jobs in different sectors. I never get bored at work!
The autoimmune condition is shit but has made me very resilient, tolerant to pain, and I don't find things like the pandemic or life difficulties very challenging as I know they will pass.
Obviously day to day it's all a bit shite but I would be a very different person without all my conditions.

Wow that’s amazing ! Well done . It must be very hard, I have lupus so completou understand the struggle . Just like you I find my Asha’s lets me focus on work and has helped me a lot .

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Wavescrashingonthebeach · 05/06/2023 15:00

Aww op I get you meant no harm, I'm a big believer in positivity and seeing the best in things and cognitive behavioural therapy etc and I watch some youtubers (some who are ND / physically disabled others who just give out advice) and I'm very into stoicism.

I would say mine are being a fast reader, having an almost photographic memory, can mimic any accent, extremely high pain threshold, can hyperfocus on things I'm really interested in, can temporarily fit in in any environment(masking masking masking.. until I either say the wrong thing or get too anxious about saying the wrong thing)

Now, if only I could apply these skills to something that would actually earn me some money wouldn't that be wonderful!

Original poster

Nothingisblackandwhite · 05/06/2023 15:01

LovelyJublee · 05/06/2023 13:03

I don't talk about myself in terms as having a superpower but I don't think OP is being dismissive of the struggles disabilities and health conditions bring us, she acknowledged that we often speak of the negatives of disabilities and I got the impression she was highlighting some of the positives for herself and asking others what theirs are. I got the impression it was about lifting self esteem and not feeling shit about the things we can't do or massively struggle with.

And some conditions do make other skills stronger, I don't think celebrating or being proud of those little things are the same as saying people don't struggle a lot. I don't feel like I have a superpower, I feel like a useless and often worthless person a lot of the time due to my disabilities, doesn't mean others can't have a moment of celebrating something they've done well or are good at.

My stepdad lost his sight op, he had to rely on his hearing and other senses more and over the years became able to know when something had been moved slightly just by the echo. He could spot when my brother was lying by the way his voice echoed with head to the ground versus looking straight at stepdad. He could tell if my sister was cheating at a board game and moving six instead of three because he could hear the sound of her little counter being a further distance away than it should have been.

Would he say being blind is a superpower? No, not at all and he'd have given the world for his sight back, but doesn't mean he can't mention how his sense of hearing became his dominate way of navigating.

Thank you , you are right I was not being dismissive at all . I think we would all exchange our disability for an easier life , specially those who have children and see them struggling daily .
you are not the first person telling me about the eating sense developing on people who lost their sight . It truly is amazing how the human brain tries to cope .

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Somanycats · 05/06/2023 15:17

fidgetcube · 05/06/2023 12:24

I’m autistic, adhd and Tourette’s and most certainly do not have any super powers. I hate this superpower nonsense. I’m sure it comforts you but it just frustrates everyone else that is disabled by their disorders.

No it doesn't. Please know you you don't speak for everyone with disorders

MaidOfSteel · 05/06/2023 15:29

I'm afraid that being riddled with Arthritis, in pain much of the time, sometimes unable to put my feet on the floor etc, brings no positives let alone any 'superpowers.'

Where does this stuff come from? Instagram?

AnorLondo · 05/06/2023 15:29

fidgetcube · 05/06/2023 12:24

I’m autistic, adhd and Tourette’s and most certainly do not have any super powers. I hate this superpower nonsense. I’m sure it comforts you but it just frustrates everyone else that is disabled by their disorders.

Doesn't fustrate me, trying to look for benefits helped me a lot after I was struggling with my diagnosis. But according to mumsnet seeing good points in my own condition is terrible and autism must always be terrible for everyone all the time.

Original poster

Nothingisblackandwhite · 05/06/2023 15:38

AnorLondo · 05/06/2023 15:29

Doesn't fustrate me, trying to look for benefits helped me a lot after I was struggling with my diagnosis. But according to mumsnet seeing good points in my own condition is terrible and autism must always be terrible for everyone all the time.

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I’m like you , and not everything about autism or adhd is bad . Having a disability despite making parts of life much harder does not have to be a curse or mean all is negative . Your atitude is the right one

OP posts:

PinkFootstool · 05/06/2023 15:46

Nothingisblackandwhite · 05/06/2023 15:38

I’m like you , and not everything about autism or adhd is bad . Having a disability despite making parts of life much harder does not have to be a curse or mean all is negative . Your atitude is the right one

Show quote history

So, by way of example, do please tell me which part of my chronic migraine isn't bad? My disability is literally disabling. It's cost me the opportunity to have children (refused access to IVF and adoption), my careers (had to leave two consecutive attempts at a career and I'm now earning £10k less than both those roles although I'm lucky I like my current job!) and has almost cost me my marriage at times.

Not sure what silver lining or magical thinking I'm supposed to have. Same for my mate with PTSD from being raped - many years of terrible experiences and constantly reliving those attacks. What's the great part of that for her?

LadyJ2023 · 05/06/2023 15:52

Autistic, I can drive miles around an area I dont know and do the exact same drive from memory the next day,week whenever. Also can listen to several convos at once and tell you what each person said

OpenDoors72 · 05/06/2023 15:54

She asked about the positives.

It's like if someone posted 'Tell me about cats' and you responded going on about dogs.

angharat · 05/06/2023 15:56

I’m like you , and not everything about autism or adhd is bad . Having a disability despite making parts of life much harder does not have to be a curse or mean all is negative . Your atitude is the right one

The 'right' one?

There is some middle ground between curse and superpower you know.

OpenDoors72 · 05/06/2023 15:57

angharat · 05/06/2023 15:56

I’m like you , and not everything about autism or adhd is bad . Having a disability despite making parts of life much harder does not have to be a curse or mean all is negative . Your atitude is the right one

The 'right' one?

There is some middle ground between curse and superpower you know.

But she asked only about the positives here.

ArseInTheCoOpWindow · 05/06/2023 16:00

This super shower shit is hateful.

I have anxiety and depression. What a a ‘superpower’ from them. They’re crap illnesses.

DD had ASD and GAD and won’t go to school. ‘Superpower’ just trivialises an already hateful and difficult situation.

OpenDoors72 · 05/06/2023 16:02

ArseInTheCoOpWindow · 05/06/2023 16:00

This super shower shit is hateful.

I have anxiety and depression. What a a ‘superpower’ from them. They’re crap illnesses.

DD had ASD and GAD and won’t go to school. ‘Superpower’ just trivialises an already hateful and difficult situation.

SOME people can have positive traits from a condition.

There are plenty of purely negative threads about disability. Can people not refrain from giving their off-topic opinion on this one.

angharat · 05/06/2023 16:04

But she asked only about the positives here.

I know what she asked as it's in her OP, but this is a discussion forum and we're allowed to discuss and disagree with points and terms used in the OP.

Hyperfocus listed as a positive 'superpower' here, can also be detrimental as other posters have stated. I've found it to be both negative and positive. It's not a superpower, in my opinion.

I do have the good memory, and ability to read books quickly, but so does my NT sister.

ArseInTheCoOpWindow · 05/06/2023 16:04

Why? Are we not allowed to contest a stupid statement?

I’ll say it again . Having disabilities is shit. There are no positives. Depression is about looking on the black side. HTF does that have a facile superpower?

MrsLilaAmes · 05/06/2023 16:04

Nothingisblackandwhite · 05/06/2023 14:52

I did nit mean to offend anyone , I have a son with severe autism I do understand the struggles but even he has some amazing abilities . I’m just trying to stay positive and create a positive thread . I did not mean to offend anyone

OP, I believe you didn't mean to cause offence. I'm curious - do you think your DS has his amazing abilities because of his autism, or in spite of it, or just purely coincidentally?

Because we don't really have good words to use, I am not sure whether by 'severe autism' you mean 'very impactful on day to day functioning' or 'including a learning disability'? In my experience, for DC who have a moderate to severe learning disability, the desire to talk about 'superpowers' means that the DC get commended for being 'smiley' or 'happy' as if that is an achievement and not just how their resting face was interpreted, or a contrast with the DC with behavioural difficulties. It tends to have the effect, on parents I know, of highlighting just how much their DC can't do, if the only thing available to commend was 'smileyness'. It's a pretty mediocre superpower at any rate!

Chocchops72 · 05/06/2023 16:05

I’m deaf. Severe, not profound, so I can hear with aids but I need to lip read and see peoples faces.

i think it makes me pay a lot of attention to unspoken communication. What people say is only a small part of communication, and I think I’m often able to pick up on when people are upset or troubled or stressed despite the words coming out of their mouths. Not exactly a superpower but it makes me more empathic I think.

Whichwhatnow · 05/06/2023 16:06

I don't like this superpower stuff at all. I mean if it makes you happy, OP, then that is your prerogative.

I would say that I would not be the person I am without BPD, autism, OCD and C-PTSD. I don't regret the person I am, and I've done massively well at work etc, but I don't have a superpower. To me it's just trite. But you do you.