Hi - apologies if I'm on wrong section but parenting didn't feel right for adult parent dilemmas.
Really just after opinions on what to do but be gentle...
My 'd'f has always had anger problems and I suspect some form of undiagnosed autism. On top of that he's incredibly insecure. He's very prone to screaming, threatening outbursts and finds offence in totally innocent statements. Also he loves making out that I'm stupid or just wrong about everything to make himself feel big.
It used to affect me when I was younger but now I'm over it (mostly). The only thing that's changed is I'm about to have a baby of my own. If my DH treated our daughter that way I would divorce him in a heartbeat.
On our last visit to my parents my DH was having a hard time as his own DF was dying. My father seemed to take this as a personal insult somehow and ended up screaming in my face, calling me a liar (not sure what about), etc etc same old rigmarole.
I told him afterwards by text I didn't want to see him unless he went to therapy or anger management. But he's just totally ignored this ultimatum. My DM says he just won't do it not that she's particularly pushing him.
I've more or less ignored him since he lost it at me that last time. I do feel sad that I don't have a normal father but nothing in life is perfect.
So now I'm in a pickle. Baby due very soon. I'm just not going to cause a family upset by banning him from seeing her - I don't want anything to taint baby's birth. But I've tried to set a boundary and don't want him to think he can grind me down.
What do I do??