When to expect wedding invite?

[LittleBumblebee3]

If you received a ‘Save The Date’ last year for an October 2023 wedding. When would you be expecting then invite to arrive?

I never had a wedding with guests so have no idea what the norm is for timelines here!

Traditionally invitations were sent 6 weeks before the wedding, but this was when people were less likely to have to travel or make overnight arrangements.
It tends to be usually anything between 2-4 months before the date now

I'd expect to have it now. We sent invitations for our October wedding in March but didn't bother with a save the date.

No idea, I'd assume because you have a save the date they already know you've saved it so it could be quite late

I'd say 6m before is reasonable

I'd expect it 3 months before the wedding date

I’d be happy to receive it 3 months before if I already knew the date

The noun is 'invitation'.

'To invite' is the verb.

Given you have a Save the Date card, I wouldn't expect to have received a full invitation yet necessarily. If nothing by August, I'd feel antsy. Have you got anyone else you can ask who might also be waiting?

It's an invitation, and etiquette holds that they are sent out 6 weeks before the event.

I have 2 weddings to attend in October and have invites for both of them already.

Even with save the dates sent out it would be pretty usual iny experience to send the actual invite as late as 6-12 weeks before the actual event. These days people tend to send them much earlier as it gives their guests more time to organise transport, time off, childcare if needed and hotel bookings ect.

If I hadn't received it by the end of June I'd probably assume I was no longer invited.

If you already have a Save the Date, then you don't really need masses more info, so I'd say July-ish for the full invite.

The only issue would be if the full invite was for an abroad wedding or some remote location in your country. Assuming the couple are local to you, what more info do you need at this point?

I wouldn't necessarily expect an invitation. We're going to weddings in September and October. One couple sent a Save the Date card and has a website with all the details. The other was a personal email from the bride with a link to their website. I suspect a fancy printed card is just another unnecessary expense.

I received an invitation for a September 2023 wedding in February 2023. We received save the dates in November 2022. It felt a smidge early but basically fine. I will be sending invitations for my March 24 wedding at the end of September/beginning of October 23.

I am supposed to be attending an early July wedding but no invite yet (business partner of my partner)

I am loathe to book hotels without an actual invite /idea of timings. We could train it there back in a day in theory.

Please ignore this.

Half of traditional etiquette was written when people had very little to fill their diaries with.

Nobody would write the same rule today - which is a good guide to whether the same rule has any credibility.

If it involves travel / childcare or anything else that is going to be of additional expense then is there anyone else you can ask? Family of the B or G or mutual friends?

Early July...I would absolutely presume I wasn't invited and make alternative plans, it's less than 6 weeks away!

If you're going to correct someone (which is unnecessary anyway) shouldn't you at least check you're right?

noun INFORMAL
Invite
an invitation.
"no one turns down an invite to one of Mickey's parties"

Name your sources?

Mumsnet is based in the UK and I'm quoting British English.

Normally I would assume not invited but we were told by email start May and there had been a sudden death in the family/funeral just happened.

As it is, I am not fussed if invited or not, but partner will check once his partner bsck working.

If we lived further away and had to book travel/hotels then this late notice would mean costs for trains x d hotels would have gone way up so we'd decline.

If you have a save the date already then six weeks before.

And the message we can ALL take from this thread is...that nobody knows OP! Everyone has their own 'reasonable timeframe' depending on their circumstances 🤷‍♀️

The old etiquette rules are very outdated and can absolutely be disregarded in 2023 (so the 'six weeks before' thing). Any other 'reasonable timeframe' is very much dependent on each persons circumstances, eg location, financial, family unit, health, work (shifts/holiday entitlement), diary/commitments etc so won't apply to you OP 🤷‍♀️

This is so outdated though. In reality even with a save the date no one is waiting until the wedding is 6 weeks away to send invites not least because it gives you no time at all for people to feed back good choices to the catering team and with the way Royal Mail are at present it could take about 3 weeks for the invite to arrive.

6 weeks is the old-fashioned traditional.

It's typically longer now. But for those guests who have had a STD, then about 3 months would be OK (unless elaborate travel/accommodation issues, in which case they need to know timings etc with certainty well in advance)

Actually, unless you've chosen a peak date when lots of Other Stuff is likely to be going on, then about 3-4 months is fine all round. I think more than about 6 months is a bit excessive though

(and yes, I miss the nouns "invitation" and "quotation" too!)

The last two invites we got were 2 months before the wedding but we have had save the dates for both the past year so knew they were coming.

Six weeks before sounds like madness! By the time the invitations had arrived, guests had gotten around to RSVPing, and stragglers who hadn’t RSVPed chased up, there would barely be time to advise caterers of dietary requirements and make any special / access arrangements for guests requiring them. Holy hell, wedding planning can be stressful enough without being that last minute about it.

We’ve just sent ours out for our end September 2023 wedding - but ours involves everyone travelling and DP’s side of the family flying from the US so advance notice of the detail was pretty important. I’d rather send out early than late, nobody needs to be chasing up RSVPs with weeks to go, especially since any drop outs at that stage make it difficult for alternative guests to be invited.