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Original poster

Daughter worried about grandson

27 replies

Marylou62 · 31/05/2023 20:23

My grandson is 5mths old and up to last week has been exclusively breast fed.. He was a very unhappy baby.. cried lots.. and only happy when fed..2-3 hourly..(he started on veg/fruit purees once a day a few days ago and the change is amazing)
He was 7lb 2oz at birth but was 3 weeks early..
His Dad is very tall, not fat but a large build..
He was 20lb at 4 mths..
My DD took him to a drop in clinic today and he weighed 22lb and the HV said because he'd crossed 3 centiles she would have to refer him..
DD was upset as no other professionals she has seen have ever been worried about his size.. and is worried that she's done something wrong..
Anyone else had a big baby and referral just showed..a big baby!?

OP posts:
IamAlso4eels · 31/05/2023 20:40

IME of babies, they tend to chunk up a bit at this age just before they start sitting up and crawling/bum shuffling. I'd guess it's partly to do with the increase in calories from weaning and storing up a bit of chub/energy ready for the increase in development. Even my skinniest baby looked a little bit beefy at the 5-6m mark then once they started crawling they very quickly slimmed down again.

HVs have protocols to follow and if their protocol says they need to refer then let them crack on. Who are they referring to? The GP? Paediatrics? All they'll do is check him over, see a healthy baby, and will send them on their way.

Wishing4sunshine · 31/05/2023 20:47

Sounds to me like he is just a hungry baby and is getting his fill now bless him. My friend had a baby like this, never really content at all until they started weaning at 5 months. Instant change, put on lots of weight, and same situation, his dad is a big guy, not fat but tall and broad rugby player. Hope your DD isn't worrying herself too much, sounds normal to me.

Original poster
Marylou62 · 31/05/2023 20:51

Thank you both of you..
He was huge before any solids..
Dad is rugby player too!
I'm actually an x paediatric nurse and tried to reassure her but she's so upset..
I told her that this is her life now ... worries! She's resilient enough tho and I'm sure the GP will reassure her...

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HappyKoala56 · 31/05/2023 20:57

My baby was born on the 9th centile and went up to the 75th in no time. He is now a perfectly proportioned 5ft 8 (and still growing) healthy BMI child of 14 years. Let them refer if they want, but doesn't sound anything to worry about at the mo

Original poster
Marylou62 · 31/05/2023 21:00

Thank you.

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OhDoh · 31/05/2023 21:01

Honestly she shouldn't worry. We had this with DS. doc literally said he wasn't worried about chubby babies only the thin ones lol 😂. Whole appointment lasted 10 mins. He did say to never use hungry baby milk which was something I nearly bought.

TheSnowyOwl · 31/05/2023 21:04

It shouldn’t be his birth weight they look at, because that is a reflection on the placenta, but his centile at six weeks as that will be the true line he is then expected to follow. So going up more than two centiles from where he was at six weeks would trigger a referral but it’s really just a check to make sure all is well and nothing is being missed.

ManyATrueWord · 31/05/2023 21:06

Tell your daughter to let them crack on. It's statistics that prevent the health visitor from thinking and making an intelligent decision about the individual case in front of her. Honestly if it isn't the numbers on the scale it's the rate of growth they get you about.

DrunkenKoala · 31/05/2023 21:14

DS was born on the 98th centile (14 yrs ago) and had jumped up to 99.6 by 8wks, and was off the chart by 20wks. Our normal HV had no concerns but saw another one at around 8mths who freaked me out a bit talking about dietitians. I spoke to my normal HV and she was fine about it, mentioned both mine and DP’s height (I’m 5’10, DP is 6’3) and that we’d just keep an eye on him. DS did reach his physical milestones a bit later than his peers but once he started moving he slimmed down. He’s now 14, my height and his BMI fine. Never did see the dietitian.

Holidaytime86 · 31/05/2023 21:27

DD is the same. Born 7lb 4oz and 3 weeks early. Was on the 25th percentile. At 7 months she was on the 95th percentile and weighed 23lb. She is breastfed and was always wanting milk. There’s a slight improvement now we’re weaning and she feeds less often.

MapofVenice · 31/05/2023 21:29

Do you mean he was only being breastfed every 2/3 hours and not when he was crying hungry inbetween? Exclusively breastfed babies should be fed on demand - if he was waiting inbetween no wonder he was unhappy!

Posypointshoes · 31/05/2023 21:32

My nephew went through that many as well - he was breastfeed but lost weight and then formula fed due to sister’s supply issues and he properly chunked up.
he was also off the scale for head circumference and they scared the life out of her referring him incase he had an issue. The consultant glanced at him, did a cursory check and sent them on their way, didn’t even fully weigh him just said to come back in three months and if he was still gaining that rapidly then they would look into it further.
it was a mega growth spurt and he did calm down a bit once he got more mobile. Now he’s a little chunk still but fully slimmed down - he’s always going to be a sturdy lad but his dad is over six foot so I think he probably takes after that side of the family!

Posypointshoes · 31/05/2023 21:33

@MapofVenice this is what they told my sister to do - only feed every two to three hours and her supply dried up! He was so miserable and then she saw an older midwife who was aghast at the advice she had been given and tried to help but by then she had to switch to formula

Wannabedisneyprincess · 31/05/2023 21:38

The health visitor told me that my daughter was overweight at her 2 and a half year review as her BMI was slightly 1 point over the guidelines, but I shouldn’t worry because she doesn’t ‘look fat’ I’ve refused to take her back to the HV since and actually refused to engage with that particular HV since my 1yr old DS was born

at 3m she told me my DD needed a dummy because she didn’t have one and it was better for safer sleep (we had been trying to get her to take a dummy and I stopped bfing her shortly after and she took a dummy) then at 9m she told me to get rid of the dummy

my advice to all new mums now is to ignore the health visitor

PigeonPigPie · 31/05/2023 21:45

There are less calories in purees veg than in breastmilk anyway! But she should be feeding on demand not on a timetable.

PinkPlantCase · 31/05/2023 21:46

We only took DS to be weighed once. He went from being 40th percentile when he was born to 97th within a few months. I’ve never known gaining weight in an ebf baby to be a problem, it’s what they’re meant to do. We didn’t go and get him weighed because he was clearly healthy and not having any issues.

After about 6months his weight stopped going up as quickly (as is also completely normal)

And now he’s a toddler he’s starting to slim down as his proportions change.

spiderlight · 31/05/2023 21:49

My DS was born on the 6th centile, EBF, and by 6 months he was on the 91st centile. The HV was forever muttering about him crossing lines. He was absolutely fine - just a boob monster who was fed on demand (and boy could he demand) and absolutely shot up in height as a toddler. He's a 6ft lanky teenager now. He always put on weight before a growth spurt. Hopefully your grandson is just destined to be tall.

InSpainTheRain · 31/05/2023 22:02

I don't think she should be worried - it's far better to get something checked. HVs etc have charts and figures to go by, any detail that doesn't coincide with their charts they refer. I think it's a good thing and will just give extra peace of mind.

Original poster
Marylou62 · 01/06/2023 07:02

Thank you all for your advice.. I'll show DD when I see her tomorrow..
I wrote this thread after a long shift and after talking to upset DD..
He IS fully fed on demand.. mostly 2 hourly.. sometimes 1! (Rarely 3 and only if being held). She sometimes tried to string feeds out for longer as her nipple's were very sore.. he's what I'd call high needs.. only happy on the boob, would only sleep being held..
He was taken to a cranial osteopath and had sessions for 6 wks..
But since introducing solids he's turned a corner...
So it was a bit of a shock to her yesterday..
I'll continue to reassure her and enjoy my Little Chunky Monkey!

OP posts:
pilates · 01/06/2023 07:09

Bless her - it’s such a worry with the first one that you’re doing it ‘right’. I’m sure it will all be fine in the end.

SofiaAmes · 01/06/2023 07:12

My dd was born on her due date at 8lbs and within a few months despite being ebf on demand, became the fattest roundest baby ever. HV was sure there was something wrong and wanted to put her on a diet by 5 months. I just ignored. DD didn't walk until 19 months, so didn't start thinning out until after that. DD is now 20 years old and a beautiful, slim 5'8"
When you see photos of me at the same age, I was HUGE and literally round. I thinned out when I started to walk and have been slim since then.
No disrespect to HV's in general, but I saw nothing but useless ones when my dc's were little.

Original poster
Marylou62 · 01/06/2023 07:12

MapofVenice · 31/05/2023 21:29

Do you mean he was only being breastfed every 2/3 hours and not when he was crying hungry inbetween? Exclusively breastfed babies should be fed on demand - if he was waiting inbetween no wonder he was unhappy!

Sometimes he was unhappy before a feed, unhappy whilst being fed (fussing), unhappy after a feed, she spent hours feeding, winding, rocking, patting..
The only break was when either his Dad or I took over and walked with him...
So whilst being fully demand fed we sometimes tried to distract him with dummies and rocking and patting to let her have a shower..
Hense me saying he sometimes (rarely) went 3 hrs..
I wrote this post after a long shift and after talking to upset DD...

OP posts:
Original poster
Marylou62 · 01/06/2023 09:49

I should also add he's in 9-12 mth clothes. So he's long bodied and limbed ..

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pumpkinpepper · 01/06/2023 12:28

My dc was like this ebf and told far too over weight. Now 10 very slim and still incessantly eating!!

CheeseAndOnionIsMyFav · 01/06/2023 12:48

Both of mine were EBF and fusspots too. The HVs were sometimes concerned but mostly they looked at length and weight and provided they were roughly in line, they seemed happy. Neither kids are overweight now (primary age and a teen).

However they do have to follow their protocols to catch the tiny percentage of babies that need an intervention.