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Original poster

Wearing shorts with scars (TW)

23 replies

ashamedofmyself · 30/05/2023 19:19

I’ve got several (self inflicted) scars on my upper thighs. One side is lighter pink, the other side has gone purple in two bits. They’re not huge scars but they’re obvious where they’ve gone purple/darker.

I want to wear shorts outside as it’s so hot; but I don’t want people judging me for harming myself either and I’m scared they will. I’m obese as it is so already have enough reasons for people to be laughing at me.

I’ve got the same on my forearm, but they’ve faded much more and much less obvious unless you’re really looking. Is it OK to wear shorts?

OP posts:

Whattodo112222 · 30/05/2023 19:25

I have a few old scars from shaving as a teenager and not knowing what I was doing . I used to wear leg makeup but as I got older I cared less.. I don't notice anyone looking at me if I have my legs out.
If I saw you and I did happen to look I would just think you were strong and brave in a non patronising way if that make sense.
Don't care about what others think. Embrace yourself and you deserve to wear what makes you comfortable xx

Megifer · 30/05/2023 19:28

Of course its fine, get those legs out! I've seen a few people with obvious self harm scars and do you know what I thought?

"Ahhh I hope they're ok now"

Because I'm not a total twat (just with some things).

user1471453601 · 30/05/2023 19:30

I have a scar that runs from the nape of my neck, down my spine then turns into a "j" shape around my middle.

I once asked my daughter if the scar looked ok in a summer dress I had bought. My daughter was aghast. She told me the scar is a battle wound, and I won the battle, so who the duck cared what anyone else thought?

I used to see people do a double take as I walked towards the swimming pool. I kept my daughter's words in mind. My battle scars, I won that particular battle (or my surgeon did, whatever). I'm proud I won.

you've won your particular battle. Wear your shorts with pride. And being overweight is not a reason to be laughed at. Anyone who does is saying much more about themselves than about you.

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Justhereforthechristmasthreads · 30/05/2023 19:32

Can you get some longer knee length shorts if you would feel less "on show" ?

It's not from self harm, but I have some really bad scarring to my lower leg from about 10 years ago. I used to just keep it covered up and boil, then i would wear natural coloured knee highs underneath cropped trousers but this year I have decided sod it - I'm going to wear my shorts if I want to.

I know you feel self conscious but how many times do you notice something like scars on someone else if you see them in the street? We are all top worried about our own bodies to really pay close attention to anyone elses.

If you want to wear shorts, go for it. Your scars are just one small part of who you are. Just make sure you are generous with the sun lotion over your scars

Gilead · 30/05/2023 19:35

I have a stoma, it can be seen occasionally, I also have psoriasis. I don’t give a flying fuck what anyone thinks. Do what you want to do.

BriarHare · 30/05/2023 19:37

Wear the shorts.

People might notice scars, but nice people won’t judge. And who cares about the not nice ones, their judgement isn’t worth your concern.

SummerSimmer · 30/05/2023 19:50

I am covered in scars on my legs and have never thought to hide them.

DaisyWaldron · 30/05/2023 19:55

I have visible, noticeable old self-harm scars on my arms and wear shirt sleeves whenever it's warm enough. Nobody's ever said anything. Occasionally I'll see someone else with similar scars, and we'll give each other a wry smile, but that's all.

RequiresUpdating · 30/05/2023 19:59

I have scars on my leg and I do try to cover them most of the time, Not so people can't see them but because scar tissue burns far more easily than unscarred skin. So make sure you use a decent sun cream when you wear your shorts!

FlySwimmer · 30/05/2023 20:00

I have a large scar on my leg, admittedly not from self-harming but from surgery following an injury. The first summer with the scar I really had to summon the courage to go out in shorts/dresses, I was convinced it looked awful. But gradually I came to see it as proof of what I had overcome, and now I don’t care. Sometimes people do take a second glance, but very rarely does anyone really stare or been horrible.

IkeaMeatballGravy · 30/05/2023 20:07

Your comfort matters more than some ignorant person's opinion.

SnappyDragony · 30/05/2023 20:52

It's hard isn't it?
My thighs are riddled with scars and I have never worn short shorts but would love to!
It seems so easy to say to yourself "sod what others think", but a small part thinks people will stop in the street to gasp and point, or whisper to one another behind their hands.
I've noticed people with scars and yes, I noticed. I always thought how brave they were. However I cannot extend that to myself. I would love to be able to wear above the knee and I have, on occasion and always felt horribly self conscious.
I have noticed though that most people are more concerned with their immediate circle/bubble/worried about their own appearance to take much notice of others.
HTH

Igotjelly · 30/05/2023 20:56

As others have said, wear your shorts and be proud of your wonderful body (because ALL bodies are fab!) You’re scars are part of what makes you you and, as PP said my only thought would be to hope that you’re no longer in such a bad place ♥️

Sherrystrull · 30/05/2023 21:12

I have scars on my arms. They are part of me and I wear them with pride. Don't hide away.

Hoppinggreen · 30/05/2023 21:15

My legs are not great, short fat and basically look like I’m wearing tights full of porridge.
I wear shorts whenever I want and don’t care if anyone doesn’t like it. My legs are strong and work well which is what matters to me

MissBridgetJones · 30/05/2023 21:56

Wear the shorts. Wear them with pride and your held held high. X

MissBridgetJones · 30/05/2023 21:58

To heck with trying to cover them with body makeup, but do slather on the sunscreen, I have scars, they are very sun-sensitive x

MyCupSpillethOverMe · 30/05/2023 22:04

ashamedofmyself · 30/05/2023 19:19

I’ve got the same on my forearm, but they’ve faded much more and much less obvious unless you’re really looking. Is it OK to wear shorts?

I have the same thing - a ladder of self harm scars going most of the way across on each thigh, probably around 10 on each leg. At the beginning of my recovery they were purple (I am very pale) and I was very self conscious of them but I did wear shorts because it was hot and no one paid them any attention, commented, asked questions etc. Now it’s been about 10 years and they have faded so much you would probably not notice them unless you knew they were there. Don’t worry about other people, just wear whatever you feel comfortable in 🙂 and make sure to use sun cream!

hiccup345 · 30/05/2023 22:05

People are far more interested in what they look like themselves than what other people look like so I try to go with the 'who cares' approach when it comes to strangers. However, I am covered with fresh scars on the tops of my thighs and I do try and avoid getting them out if possible. The ones on my lower legs and arms are older so those I don't feel the need to hide as much. The only people I try to hide them from properly are friends and family which is difficult in the summer. Concealer/ foundation can work at covering up the really obvious ones. I have had tattoos to cover some of the bad ones too. I am starting to get to an age now where I care less and less about what people think tbh.

EmeraldFox · 30/05/2023 22:06

If they are on your upper thighs then wouldn't most shorts cover them anyway? If you are unsure then you could wear either mid thigh or just above the knee length shorts.

uncomfortablydumb53 · 30/05/2023 23:21

I have lots of surgical scars on my left thigh, knee and foot
I used to be self conscious but then I realised no one looked at me as I do myself
Let your legs and arms get some fresh air. You deserve to feel comfortable and not stifling under long sleeves in the heat
Honestly the more you do it, your confidence will increase
I'm really glad to hear your MH has improved( I have a MI too)

BuffaloCauliflower · 30/05/2023 23:25

I have extensive, obviously self inflicted, self harm scars all up my arm. I never cover them on purpose, I run hot and sod being boiling for other people’s comfort. Wear the shorts.

Though I will say, in my experience, people who realise what they are won’t say anything, but some who don’t immediately might, so it can be worth having a cover story if you don’t want to give the truth. But in all likelihood noone will bat an eyelid either way. Plus anyone who did judge you for them you wouldn’t want to know anyway, so best to weed them out early on.

FeigningConcern · 30/05/2023 23:58

If you want to wear shorts, do it. Fuck what anyone else thinks.

However if you want another suggestion I have one! I have very pale, almost see through, fat, corn beef effect legs 😬. I used to fake tan which covers up a multitude of sins but can't now because of allergies. I also find shorts annoying as I am very fair and have to slather on the sun cream which is a PITA so any way I can minimise skin area is a plus imo.

So anywho last year I found these!....

www.forgottentribes.com/collections/harem-pants-uk/products/peacock-feathers-harem-pants-high-crotch

They are very thin material with a lovely stretchy waist and very cool and comfortable in hot weather. I don't feel like I'm roasting and desperate for shorts in them! You can also dress them up or down.

I bought 5 pairs! 😀 I wore them through the super hot weather we had last year and was v comfortable. Would def recommend!

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