Gurning & Spontaneous Human Combustion

[Underminer]

Not connected to each other, but when I was little, circa mid 80s, gurning used to be a regular thing on telly, along with spontaneous human combustion being a thing we were all scared of happening to us.
Anyone else remember this? Maybe the gurning was on Record Breakers? I remember watching it on more that on occasion, my brother has a memory of old men with no teeth pulling faces through horse collars, and he thinks it was a toothpaste advert and that’s why we don’t really hear about it now? We don’t live in an area with contests.

What other random things do you remember that seem to have spontaneously combusted in history?

I read somewhere that most of the cryogenic companies went out of business and the bodies were disposed of.

I love this thread. I know we blame screens for the reason kids don't roam and explore as much now, but I reckon a whole generation was terrified through public information films of the 70s/80s, and that had a big impact on their parenting.

I'd love to know what the uk statistics were on pylon deaths, track trespassing and quicksand which triggered these films!

Maybe no more gurning as false teeth are rare? Although the way NHS dentistry is going perhaps it will make a comeback.

I remember a Filofax being the latest 'thing' at my school, it was available to buy at the newsagents for some reason. I was so excited when I was finally allowed to have it! There was a 'fact' section in it about spontaneous human combustion which I had never heard of before that and it scared the shit out of me. I asked dad if it was real- 'yes.'- thanks dad 😂 I was on/off worried about it for the next few years

'Ink poisoning' was what the big kids used to scare us younger ones about. 'Oooh you've got some biro on your finger, you'll die of ink poisoning now'

I'm just here causally ignoring all the real quicksand stories. I don't need that fear back again 🤣

My mum made me throw out all my books about the unexplained and ghosts as she thought by having them in the house it would encourage bad vibes.

Ectoplasm! Wow, I’d forgotten about that. I was always slight concerned how it ‘came out’ of your orifices, when it came out (could be socially awkward) - and in what form. I also read as a child that ghosts sometimes attach themselves to certain people but the way to get rid of them was to cross water such as a stream or a river. I was always relieved on the way home if we drove over a bridge as then I knew I wouldn’t be bringing home any unwelcome guests.

Thank you for reminding me about Borley Rectory too. I lived nowhere near it, but the headless horseman, the nun and the writing that appeared on the walls gave me hours of childhood entertainment. I think I was a bit of an expert on the place at about 10 as I read so much about it!

Eww I can still picture that chair,fireplace and a woman's foot still in a slipper 😱😱😱

Just remembered black holes too! Spent quite a bit of time concerned that the earth might inadvertently sucked into one of these monsters randomly wandering around the universe eating planets although that irrational concern might be due to too much Star Trek.

We were often shown the public information film Apaches at primary school. It showed kids dying in horrific farming accidents.

We lived in the suburbs of a city with no farms for miles. What was it with the 70s? And yes to pylons, quicksand and rail tracks!

I think the prevalence of things like this was due to limited options for entertaining ourselves. My parents had loads of interesting books.

I also had that readers digest book and would read from cover to cover many times over. I loved anything like that!

I'm always telling my kids about those public information films. I found some on tiktok last night and they were shocked at how scary they were. One that always stuck with me was the seatbelt one 'Julie's son killed her and then sat back down in his seat' always always make sure the rear passengers are belted in my car. That one obviously worked.

Also remember a farmyard one we used to watch in school where they found Victorian graves where children had died in farm accidents and then the modern day children were involved in the same accidents

I have the same fear of quicksand, pylons, rogue fridges and level crossings that all right-thinking children of the 70s / 80s retain, but there are also two very specific things that haunt me to this day.

1. Stonefish: we had a fabulous and enormous encyclopaedia of the natural world in our house when I was growing up and at some point, I must have read about stonefish, the world's most lethal fish. In spite of the fact that they are native to tropical waters, I, living in the west of Scotland in the 1980s and having never ventured further south than Northumberland at this point, became obsessed with the idea of accidentally stepping on a stonefish at the beach and dying horribly. I refused to set foot in the sea for a good couple of years.
2. Wellingtons and escalators: I loved 'That's Life', presented by Esther Rantzen (I know, I know, I was quite an odd child) and occasionally, in between consumer rights stories and light-hearted pieces about skateboarding ducks and talking dogs, they would have some pretty serious stories about terrible things going wrong. The one that gave me the absolute heebies was a story about a girl who I guess must have been about the same age as I was then getting her wellies caught in the 'lip' at the top of an escalator somewhere (possibly the Tube, I can't remember) and having part of her leg horribly chewed off. To this day (I'm now 44) I still jump off escalators about two steps from the top.

Ah, the good old days of controlling people's behaviour by inflicting terror, eh?! plus ça change, plus c'est la même chose...

My grandparents had this one!

@dooneyousmugelf 'Ink poisoning' was what the big kids used to scare us younger ones about. 'Oooh you've got some biro on your finger, you'll die of ink poisoning now'

I used to work with someone who took their child to A&E as she thought he'd get lead poisoning from being stabbed in the hand with a pencil.

Quicksand is very much still a thing.
https://www.dailyrecord.co.uk/news/scottish-news/quicksand-horror-scots-beach-teen-30080207

Cleethorpes coastguard had two “stuck in mud” call-outs on Sunday alone.

I think I read that book! The Cottingly fairies were obviously fake but SHC was worrying. I remember a BBC experiment where they wrapped a pig in a blanket and showed how a body would burn hot with clothes as a wick. Not spontaneous at all, phew!

Just loving this thread, it’s unearthed so many childhood memories.

When I was growing up, everyone ‘had a friend who knew someone’ that either had a spider living in their ear or had an apple seed in there that had grown into a small tree. Never knew anyone first hand that either of these events had happened to though!

All of these but my worst fear was a lion or tiger escaping from the circus. I lived in terror when there was a circus anywhere near us. It must have happened a lot in the 70s.

I've just remembered a horrible Farmers Weekly of the 1980s showing the various appalling ways you could be injured/killed on a farm.

The poor child waving forlornly before drowning in a slurry pit, a man with an arm off due to getting caught in a PTO and the dangers of propping tractor tyres against a wall where they could fall over and CRUSH YOU TO DEATH!

I knew about 5 people, who knew people who had spiders bite them, the bite swelled up and then spiders burst out of their arms 🤣

Apparently fridges are v hard to open from the inside because of the mild suction effect - close one, and then try opening it gently. It takes more force than you'd think! If you are inside taking up most of the space apparently you can't get the required force and they also are somewhat airtight. So if a child is alone and shuts themself in one, they will probably suffocate before anyone realises and lets them out.

Fun-fax or Funfile!! Can't remember rhe name. Was like a small ring binder with blue lines on it! Loved it! Also had a spy file

I was going to say the thing about escalators.

There was an advert where a girl drops a doll and it gets ripped up at the bottom. I was never particularly bothered by escalators but always felt sorry for the doll and relieved that it wasn't the little girl who got caught.

Anyone else remember the 'Charlie says...' cartoon adverts about not going off with strangers? I suppose its not such a problem now as children rarely get to play out alone. And they are more likely to be knocked over on the roads than be abducted.

oh have your spied Tudor ghosties? I do think a Tudor ghost is really the top tier ghost. Followed in second place by Victorian child ghosts.