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Original poster

Am I being harsh to DD?

16 replies

MeTimeNeeded · 29/05/2023 21:17

I've had a long week (work has been bad, DC and I have been ill and not sleeping well), so I'd mentally pencilled in tonight to put my feet up for an hour and was really looking forward to it as a distraction from the dread of being back at work tomorrow.

Unfortunately DD (5) had a catnap in the car earlier so couldn't fall asleep at her usual time. She reappeared downstairs as I was updating my CV/applying for jobs, and minutes away from finishing and enjoying some me time.

So I said she could play next to me while I finished my work but then had to go to bed. I sent her back up (I did read her another book) then went to shower and now waiting to see if she's asleep before I dare put the TV on.

But I feel like a bad mum :(. She never plays up at bedtime, she genuinely wasn't tired and I prioritised myself over her, is it bad or would anyone else have done the same?

OP posts:
mynameiscalypso · 29/05/2023 21:19

I definitely would have done the same. I try to keep DS to a similar bedtime every night. Sometimes he doesn't go to sleep immediately but he knows that once he's in bed, that's where he stays.

FloweryName · 29/05/2023 21:20

Why you did was fine. There is nothing there that you need to feel bad about.

DustyLee123 · 29/05/2023 21:20

Sounds alright to me. You didn’t shout or hit her !

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IlIlI · 29/05/2023 21:20

It's not bad or too harsh. If you'd let her stay up it wouldn't have been bad either, it's half term.
You did let her stay up slightly longer and play next to you but you didn't go way off your usual routine, it's fine.

AuditAngel · 29/05/2023 21:21

You gave her some extra time, didn’t tell her off, but also didn’t reward her coming back down by giving her loads of attention. Sounds like a perfect job to me!

AtrociousCircumstance · 29/05/2023 21:23

You did great. Now enjoy some you time 😊

EverythingsCominUpMilhouse · 29/05/2023 21:24

No you were absolutely fine! Honestly nothing to worry about or feel bad over. You sound like a great mum 💛

Original poster
MeTimeNeeded · 29/05/2023 21:33

I can hear her snoring now so the operation was a success!

And now thanks to your lovely responses I can enjoy my me time guilt free (or at least try!)

Thank you so much!

OP posts:
EverythingsCominUpMilhouse · 29/05/2023 21:41

Aw that's brilliant ☺️ enjoy your evening!

pancakesandlemons · 29/05/2023 21:45

You are allowed to prioritise yourself sometimes, it's important that you do and it will help to teach your children that they can do the same sometimes when they are adults. She was safe, she was warm, she was loved and you settled her back into bed, I reckon that's a win for both sides.

pointythings · 29/05/2023 21:58

You handled it absolutely perfectly.

Tilllly · 29/05/2023 21:59

MeTimeNeeded · 29/05/2023 21:33

I can hear her snoring now so the operation was a success!

And now thanks to your lovely responses I can enjoy my me time guilt free (or at least try!)

Thank you so much!

You were spot on!

Aaaaand relax 😊

NuffSaidSam · 29/05/2023 22:02

Good grief.

It's absolutely fine.

SnackyOnassis · 29/05/2023 22:05

Can't think of a better way to have handled this, really! You acknowledged her feelings and let her sit with you, so if she needed a little chat or something was on her mind she knew you were there for her.

You then kept her to a familiar routine so it doesn't set an exciting precedent of 'if I go downstairs I get to stay up really late'.
I'd say that's pretty much as good as it could go!!

Lwrenagain · 29/05/2023 22:33

I'm heavily pregnant and very hormonal and I found myself tearing up like, "aww she's a lovely mum worrying about that!" 🙈😂(So now I'm going to watch the episode of friends where chandler proposes to Monica and cry into my ice pop like the unhinged bastard I am)

You did a great job, usually these threads are parents, "so I've kicked DC (4 in july) out to live with the foxes and stray cats because they spilt some water on the carpet I've just freshly hoovered, and earlier on, so not to drip feed, they didn't return their encyclopedias to their shelf in alphabetical order and the au pair spent an hour doing that last week".

Shes fine and you're lovely for worrying!

Original poster
MeTimeNeeded · 30/05/2023 10:37

Lwrenagain · 29/05/2023 22:33

I'm heavily pregnant and very hormonal and I found myself tearing up like, "aww she's a lovely mum worrying about that!" 🙈😂(So now I'm going to watch the episode of friends where chandler proposes to Monica and cry into my ice pop like the unhinged bastard I am)

You did a great job, usually these threads are parents, "so I've kicked DC (4 in july) out to live with the foxes and stray cats because they spilt some water on the carpet I've just freshly hoovered, and earlier on, so not to drip feed, they didn't return their encyclopedias to their shelf in alphabetical order and the au pair spent an hour doing that last week".

Shes fine and you're lovely for worrying!

Haha this really made me laugh, I'm with you on the Chandler and Monica proposal!

I really enjoyed my me time, and even pushed the boat out and had some popcorn!

Now back to the work drudgery, urgh. Have a good week everyone!

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