I’ll try to be as clear and not drip feed as much as possible.
I have this friend who I have known for 5 years and we hit it off straight away - I really liked her and she really liked me.
About a year after we met up, things started to be hard for her so I did everything I could to help her, cooked for her, babysat for her so she could go out with her dh, took her kids out whenever I could, my dc are older so no problem, generally going to her whenever she needed etc…
Then last year she asked me for a favour but I couldn’t help and I stopped hearing from her, when I suggested we go for a drink, she wouldn’t take me up on my offer so I stopped asking and I was having a hard time, depression, stuff going on with my kids, suicidal ideation..I told her I was having a tough time but I have never unloaded onto her. She knew or possibly preferred to ignore I was feeling down and never texted me. She didn’t initiate contact for a year.
I bumped into her and we chatted, she needed childcare for the teacher strike so I have offered to have her dc as I absolutely love her kids.
I have started to see her more since I had her kids, we went out a couple of days ago and she was talking about another friend who is really taking advantage of her hospitality and she said : all she does is take, take,take ….
My question is : didn’t she do that to me ? Taking until I couldn’t give as I was ill and she absolutely let me down ? And what am I doing still talking to her ?? Her kids are so lovely that’s why I think. Am I stupid ? Shall I let it go and just enjoy our friendship back on track ?
I’m useless, I’m a people pleaser, I’m impulsive and would do anything possible for the people I care about.
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Friendship dilemma
14 replies
Pinktrousers2020 · 28/05/2023 11:28
OP posts:
coffeeisthebest ·
28/05/2023 12:44
Pinktrousers2020 · 28/05/2023 11:43
Thank you both. I’m just so sad, we used to spend lots of time together then it stopped. Same sense of humour. My kids are much older so we can’t really exchange childcare favours..I introduced her to another friend of mine and now they are super close and I’m the odd one out. I have no use.
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