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Original poster

do you hate clutter because your parents had clutter

17 replies

cottoncandy78 · 26/05/2023 18:04

I hate clutter all ways have i guess being brought up with clutter just made me hate it thats all i saw when growing up stuff we did not need i have said this to others but know one gets its our home was a mess.
If i dont need it or use it i dont want it but i get mother saying do you want this let me get you that NO i dont want it .
My living room is a tv sofa and a small book case with books .
Bedroom one large bed and a canvas wardrobe thats it .
kitchen cooker small fridge freezer and a camping washing machine that i put in the closet cups plates bowls 4 of each i don`t have a partner my children have left home and they are the same they to hate clutter .
I dont like pitchers or paintings on walls or coffee tables .
i just dont get how some live with clutter like my mum she has stacks of bedding i only have 2 one on one off.
pitchers all over the walls display cabinets ornaments tables chairs junk just junk
boxes of stuff in the spare room she wont get rid of but thats her life and i dont have to live with it .
Me and all my sisters are minimalist my brother is a clutter bug even if its broken hes keeping it.
So If you were brought up with clutter did you become a minimalist .

OP posts:

AuntieMarys · 26/05/2023 18:06

We had very little in our house growing up as there wasn't much money for fripperies. However I am a minimalist I think because I moved a lot

Cinderellasfeatherduster · 26/05/2023 18:06

I loathe clutter. Grew up in a tidy house. DH loves clutter. It’s a never ending source of tension.

MargaretThursday · 26/05/2023 18:21

Other way round.
Df used to throw things away he saw no use to but sometimes had value to others, especially as a small child. We'd come back from a day out to find him beaming with pride at having tidied the house (using bin bags) and find that the model castle we'd slogged for ages over had been put into a bin bag and broken.

So I now struggle to throw things out. I find it very hard because I know that feeling of wanting something which I know has gone.

hopefulsquirrel · 26/05/2023 18:24

I hate clutter because my parents are terrible for it, but this sounds quite extreme OP.

bussteward · 26/05/2023 18:26

Cinderellasfeatherduster · 26/05/2023 18:06

I loathe clutter. Grew up in a tidy house. DH loves clutter. It’s a never ending source of tension.

Same. We’re staying with my parents this weekend and I’m surrounded by calm: clear surfaces, tidy rooms, a few well-chosen things. Bliss. Feel a bit sick at returning home to the heaps of crap DP surrounds us with.

QueSyrahSyrah · 26/05/2023 18:28

I don't like 'clutter' but not to your extreme OP, we have pictures on the walls and we have plants and books and the odd knick-knack. Things that make an empty room homely.

DH's Mum is the total opposite, bits and pieces crowded on every available surface, all kinds of trinkets and ornaments and whatnot. 3 clocks on the kitchen wall It's very 'her' but I couldn't live like that.

violetsunrise · 26/05/2023 18:30

I’m the opposite I think. Couldn’t relax at home, constantly being hoovered round, rarely allowed friends over incase the house was a mess (it was never a mess), never allowed to bake because of “the mess” etc. It’s a bit extreme saying “I don’t know how people can live like this. Having clutter doesn’t equate to living in squalor.

ReeseWitherfork · 26/05/2023 18:37

I don’t really know what clutter means in this context. But I grew up in a relatively messy house with lots of stuff and I currently have a relatively messy house full of lots of stuff. Well “full” is a bit of an exaggeration, and it’s certainly not a shithole. I think I have a lovely, well decorated, clean house. But human beings live here and therefore it looks like human beings live here. I’m not a minimalist and neither were my parents.

QueefQueen80s · 26/05/2023 18:38

Yes my mum is a hoarder and there was just always stuff everywhere, piles of it. I moved out and was the same for a few years and realised I hated it. Very neat now!

FourTeaFallOut · 26/05/2023 18:39

No, I hate clutter because my dm was a ruthless declutter and it became the norm. It helps that I'm not very sentimental and don't see much value in clinging on to objects.

BertieBotts · 26/05/2023 18:41

I don't dislike clutter at all, in fact I love stuff, my mum was always going on about clutter, and I didn't get why she was so obsessed with it. I came to fear the word because I thought she'd make me get rid of things that I wanted to keep!

Looking back my childhood home was cluttered and messy. I think she was overwhelmed by it and was trying to get on top of it.

I'll never be minimalist, and can't understand the desire to get rid of everything. But what I've realised as an adult is that I can't realistically function with too much stuff, so I do need to recognise what is clutter and how to pare it down.

MyFaceIsAnAONB · 26/05/2023 18:41

Yes I hate clutter because my parents had (have) a lot of clutter. It doesn’t mean my house is pristine though, it still gets messy every day (young kids) but I love a declutter and am always keeping on top of it. So I do much better than them. I was always embarrassed to have friends round etc so always make sure the kids have friends round now.

VivaVivaa · 26/05/2023 18:45

Yep! DM’s house is full of stuff. Every surface of the vast amount of furniture she owns groans under the weight of stuff. She had a conservatory built and promptly filled it with stuff and now can’t use it. It’s quite sad actually, she spends her life permanently trying to sort her stuff - it’s a real bind for her and the stuff brings her more stress than joy. I think it’s why my house is pretty minimal, although not to the extent of yours. I’m just pretty strict about what comes in and goes out. It’s the only way I can keep it vaguely clean and presentable when working full time.

FedUpWithTheNHS · 26/05/2023 18:51

I suspect that by your standards, my parents have a lot of clutter and so do I.

However, none of us are hoarders. I enjoy doing some clearing up, of MY things. We just enjoy having more things around than you.

For me, this is because that stuff has an emotional meaning to it. The carpet my grandma gave me, the grand father clock coming from my dh grand father (won many years ago at a fair lol!). I have stuff from where I grew up(abroad) etc….
And books.

GalileoHumpkins · 26/05/2023 18:55

I dislike clutter but I like things, as long as they have a place and they're tidy I'm ok with it. My mum kept an exceptionally tidy house but also liked things and it all had a place.
Clutter to me, is untidy, piled up stuff all over, things just put down and never moved again.

illiterato · 26/05/2023 19:01

I would say our house was in the middle when I was growing up. My parents have got worse with age but they’re not hoarders. I would now probably be described as reasonably minimalist but not excessively- for example I do have decorative ceramics/ photo frames etc.but I like a tidy house and that’s easier with fewer things or at least where things don’t exceed storage. I am a regular visitor at the “household recycling centre” (tip). I think it’s easier to be minimalist now as you can eliminate a lot of bulk electronically- don’t need loads of CDs, don’t need loads of books, don’t need a lot of paper files for paperwork.

Thursa · 26/05/2023 19:54

There’s a lot of stuff, but I don’t think it’s clutter as it’s clean and tidy, and everything has its place. I grew up in a filthy house and mess/dirt/dust stresses me something awful.

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