How do you manage to find time for life admin/essential tasks when both adults work full time?

[lardida]

All the banks in town have very part time opening hours and it’s pretty much weekdays only.

Doctors, dentists, can only call on weekdays and lately whenever I’ve tried to ring through for a GP appointment be it at 9:30am or 1pm I don’t get through and the automated message tells me that the phone line queues are at capacity so to call back at another time, or 111. I don’t have hours of the day to be sat on hold. I’m lucky I have a job where some days I can break off for half an hour to take a call but this is a privilege that many don’t have

House viewings. We’re trying to buy a house and arrange viewings. Estate agents call throughout the day at inconvenient times when we’re both working, then offer their only viewing availability as Tuesday at 2pm. No good if you’re in a meeting, or literally doing any other job where you can’t have your phone on you.

Scheduling with an engineer to come out and replace the boiler, except someone has to be home when they are doing it and the work might take all day. Again, lucky that I can WFH if need be in my job but I don’t like to take that as given.

How does anyone else manage in a household where both adults are working full time? It honestly seems impossible long term. This is before we have kids too, I’m all too aware the mental load and time juggling exercise will grow!

I think maybe I've just been lucky but even as a single parent I find it workable. I work full time but as long as I do my hours I can take an hour here or there and make it up elsewhere (only between 8 and 6 though so not wildly flexible but it's enough).

GP is the only one really where don't tend to get a quick answer and have to wait for a call back, but I just keep my phone on me and answer when the call comes through. I do all of my banking online as there aren't any branches within a reasonable distance, but can pay money in and out at the post office which is open on Saturdays. If the engineer is for something planned like annual boiler check I usually take a day of leave, if its something urgent (which thankfully isn't often) then I do unpaid, last min A/L or whatever. I speak with companies etc via email wherever possible.

I think you just find a way to make it work. For me the biggest struggle is balancing child's illness with work.

You just find a way to manage! Get a GP that has an online booking system, ask estate agents to do weekend or evening viewings, work from home when you can and when you have to, take annual leave and pack all these things in one day.

Honestly, millions of people manage so you will as well

We do everything online, go to dentist on Saturdays or their first early am slot. I've given up with the GP. I just use Dr Google and hope for the best, or get an appointment for my DC (they are always seen same day?) and sneak an subtle "so last week my arm fell off can you just take a quick look?"

What do you need to visit a bank for? Can't remeber the last time I went into branch. Probably 12 years ago when I married and wanted to change the name on my account.

GP - no fucker can get through to them these days, better yet get an actual appointment so we are all in the same capsizing boat there.

Just tell the EAs that you can only do 6pm weekdays or 10am weekends and let them and the sellers figure it out. They want to sell. So they need to be the ones accommodating the viewings.

I've been a lone parent since DS was 10 months and I work full time. I manage. All my banking is done online, I haven't had to physically go into the bank for years. Can book online for the dentist. I don't often have to go to the GP so very rarely ring them. I live in social housing so I don't deal with home maintenance, that's the HA's job.

We both worked full time but we did shifts and opposite shifts so if he was on early I worked late - I took the kids to school and he picked them up. We both had time in our week to sort stuff. We also both had a weekday off, sometimes more.

Without sounding like a knob, plenty of people do this without a partner. Lists, lists, lists.

And prioritising.

Hate all these posters smugly wanging on about how it’s totally manageable. It’s not easy at all. I had annual leave this week and used half of it for mopping up admin tasks I haven’t had time to deal with. I pay bills online at 11pm on weekends. Calls during the day - I try to make a list and tick it off or sometimes even set an alarm in my phone reminding me. But it’s really, really hard especially when work gets busy and then weeks go buy and I haven’t managed to order my (lifesaving) repeat prescription. I find it hard to multitask between my domestic and professional lives.

Maybe your stress comes from negotiating who will be home and when?

I'm only saying that as when it's just you, you have to just do it and there's none of the back and forth. It's much simpler, from my experience.

I agree with you. The only way I manage this is is to try to make calls, bookings etc on my way to and from work. But I am
lucky that I travel by train and on foot. Of course, that still doesn’t work if these places are 9-5.

I hear you OP. I'm a teacher so I can't WFH or wait for hours in a phone queue. Once when my boiler was broken and I was living alone, I had to wait over a week for a plumber to visit until the school
holidays. Medical and dentist appointments are scheduled for the school hols where possible but I once was years behind on my smear test as the nurse who was qualified to do the test worked term time only.

It's all a pain in the arse, but if you are struggling with two of, be glad you don't have to do it all on your own, or with a disability or health condition that makes it even harder, and try to get some perspective. Adulting just sucks sometimes.

Just wait when you do have kids. Then more than one. Kids at different ages, at different schools with different drop off and pick up times and then a 6 week holiday in the summer and their clubs don't run from 9am to 5.30pm and you're both working full time and you both have priority meetings and so who's going to pickup the kids?!!

Its a pain.

Gosh it does sound stressful. Sticking at one sounds like a good idea when you put things this way

That’s crazy! It’s such an important appointment too

V true, thanks for the perspective

I work full time but not Monday-Friday because I do 13 hour shifts. I do think it's very handy having some weekdays off for these kind of things.

In my husband's case, he works Monday-Friday but they're quite flexible if he needs to leave for an hour during the day to go to the dentist or knock off an hour or 2 earlier occasionally. He often has to work a couple hours later at busy times so it all evens out.

I'm very lucky now that I have a job where I do occasional lates so can use the mornings for that.

In previous jobs with m-f:9-5... I Would Let it all build-up then take a days annual leave And bash it all out.

It is a bit shit. Mainly the GP one, I have no idea how, for example, teachers or nurses or police officers could be expected to get appointments when they can't just wait by the phone.

To be fair though, stuff like a boiler replacement and house moves aren't exactly normal day to day admin - they are once-every-few year tasks at the most so I don't see that WFH that one day, if you are allowed, is a huge issue?

When I bought my first house I had to put my dad as a named contact because I was in full time training so unreachable 9-5. Since then I've done some form of flexible working in whatever job I've had so can't say it's been an issue for me for at least the last decade.

In fairness given that so many people don't work full time hours, (or if they do work shifts) it's probably quite rare now to have 2 people working full time with no flexible working/wfh capacity! I honestly don't know anyone out of my entire friend circle (in our 20s and 30s) where both partners are working full time and at least 1 of them can't easily take time off/wfh.

Use some holiday?
Make the time up / swap a shift

Everything online and take time off when needed.
House viewing all arrange by email or text . I insist on WhatsApp for a lot of correspondence as I simply can't answer when working.

And yeah, I didn't know banks still had premises to visit 😂

But I DO find it easy. Most admin tasks take a few minutes at most. There are ways to make it manageable. Paying bills at 11pm - why not just set up a direct debit/standing order? I order a repeat prescription of my contraception, I use Pharmacy2u to order online and it gets sent straight to my house, it literally takes 30 seconds to go online and click the button to order it.

Lots of lists. We have 2 kids and work full time. You just manage it. It honestly isn't hard unless you aren't NT?

I kind of agree that you just do it. Also a teacher, ft single parent to two. I use free periods or whatever to fit in rare admin tasks that can't be done online after 8pm and I will tell work I'm going to be out of I need a smear. I'm a teacher not a martyr. I also agree that sometimes it's easier as it's just me because I don't have to spend anytime thinking about how to split the tasks or mental load. I know it's all on me so I do it. My kids eat beige crap a lot because I have neither time nor inclination to cook underappreciated "from scratch" stuff after a full day but everyone gets what they need, on time, clean etc. I was and dry all uniform on a Friday night, iron where needed on Saturday so it's sorted and done. I'm also uber efficient at work and give zero fucks about adopting new strategies and lesson plans every five minutes. I choose very carefully what I DO care about and spend time on that.