DS1 is unwell. He's been under the weather for quite a few weeks, but very much in a way that's normal for him (he has issues with his tonsils which mean he holds onto coughs for a long time). He was occasionally asking to go to bed early, but his nights were disrupted from coughing so this seemed fine. Always very bright and cheerful in the morning. Yesterday they said at nursery he had been pretty low energy in the afternoon, and by the time I came home about 5pm (DP picked him up) he was asleep on the sofa with flushed cheeks. His temperature came down with some nurofen but then he vomitted in the middle of the night, when he woke this morning to use the bathroom he was pretty shaky (although no temperature) and he's sleeping away now. This is all unusual for him - he usually just has a very chesty cough that eventually goes. I'm waiting for a telephone consultation with the GP at some point this afternoon.
I know this all sounds like normal childhood illness, and I'd normally feel sorry for him, check on him frequently and make sure he has plenty of fluids. However, this is the first time he's been more than his usual level of sickness since DS2 has come out of hospital (he spent 3 months on NICU) and I'm an absolute mess. I've just heard him cough on the monitor so I know he's alive, but I don't know how to control this panic. I feel constantly on the verge of tears. I don't want him to see me like this when he does wake up, but I'm having an utter mind blank about what to do.