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Ridiculous teenage situation with a man

3 replies

Pinkydamage · 08/05/2023 09:22

We've been friends or rather moved in the same circles, not particularly close, for years, maybe a decade or more.

In the last 2 years we've both been single so have found ourselves partnered up. You don't realise how much is done in pairs until you're single. Even getting the bus involves sitting in twos and when everyone else is a couple, it will be us who sit together etc. Opposite each other at dinner, next to each other at the theatre, share a cab at the end of an evening, dance together.

Anyway as this has all gone on, we've become closer friends and very good on the dance floor 😆 Or at least we have when we're with one group of friends, the ones I'd say are "my" group. With another group, where there is some overlap, but also include people who are more his friends than mine, it's often as if he barely knows me. He says it because he's catching up with people he doesn't see as often, which could have some truth, but it feels like more than that.

Anyway, this weekend, with "my" group, we had a lot of fun and he kissed me at the end of the evening. This has been building for some time and has been fun.

There are several reasons not to take the relationship further though. Our joint friends are very important to me and it would be awful if we mess things up and can't socialise together.

I'm tempted to suggest we have a "secret" weekend away to see how things go. If we're terrible together or bore each other stupid, no one need to ever know. I think we're both decent enough people that we could put it behind us and carry on as normal.

But the thing with the other friendship group also makes me wonder if there's a reason a secret arrangement might suit him and I don't want to be anyone's secret long term.

OP posts:
NeatCompactSleeper · 08/05/2023 09:25

If he acts as though he barely knows you when you're both with the other group, I wouldn't lower myself to have any sort of relationship with him to be honest.

Pinkydamage · 08/05/2023 09:27

NeatCompactSleeper · 08/05/2023 09:25

If he acts as though he barely knows you when you're both with the other group, I wouldn't lower myself to have any sort of relationship with him to be honest.

Yes, I know. We don't see them that often, the last time was Christmas, so you forget...but there's definitely something weird when he's with them or maybe one or two of them one of whom is an ex now married to his best friend

OP posts:
Pinkydamage · 08/05/2023 12:03

He's just messaged me about a stressful situation I discussed with the group on Friday night. The only one who has...

OP posts:
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