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Original poster

Why are Mallard drakes such violent sex pests ?

80 replies

WildRosie · 04/05/2023 19:42

Yesterday evening, I saw a hapless female Mallard being relentlessly pestered by two drakes. It wasn't a pretty sight but eventually our heroine managed to fly off and escape her unwelcome suitors. Do all duck family birds behave like this or is it just a Mallard thing ?

OP posts:

LittleBlueBrioTrain · 04/05/2023 21:40

Is they're not careful, they end up like poor old Dickless Dave

https://thechive.com/humanity/animals/no-one-is-having-a-worse-day-than-dave-the-duck-who-banged-so-many-birds-he-broke-his-penis-and-had-to-get-it-amputated/

No one is having a worse day than Dave the Duck, who banged so many birds he broke his penis and had to get it amputated

Dave is one unlucky duck. And while he may be a duck, he's also a dog. The nymphomaniac duck had so much sex that his dick broke and got infected. Despite his owner's best efforts to fight the infection, most of it had to be amputated. But more on that...

https://thechive.com/humanity/animals/no-one-is-having-a-worse-day-than-dave-the-duck-who-banged-so-many-birds-he-broke-his-penis-and-had-to-get-it-amputated

Geneticsbunny · 04/05/2023 21:42

Here is the scientific paper on the homosexual necrophiliac duck...

https://www.chm.bris.ac.uk/sillymolecules/papers/duck.pdf

MrsRobinsonsHandprints · 04/05/2023 21:56

evtheria · 04/05/2023 21:29

Of all the discussions to make me think "right, that's enough MN for... a long time", it's this.

It's the other way for me. Where else would a poster be aware of a scientific paper on a homosexual duck who kinks necrophilia?

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Original poster

WildRosie · 04/05/2023 21:59

They're not nice birds, clearly! I don't know about females being that choosy about which sperm they use; the hybrids I've seen locally suggest otherwise. However, one of these was a big drake, glossy black and a very smart green head. I'd like to think he was a gentleman duck and not infertile (sadly likely).

OP posts:

Aweebitpainful · 04/05/2023 22:07

I’m afraid so. We had ducks. The drakes were absolutely brutes. I’d never have a drake again!

Aweebitpainful · 04/05/2023 22:09

Roosters also can be complete dicks in spring!

littleripper · 04/05/2023 22:12

DH caught a rooster fucking a dead rabbit last spring. They really are atrocious.

NOTANUM · 04/05/2023 22:14

The link to the guardian article is hilarious. He got lots of interest in the dead duck story “especially from Great Britain” 😁

RoseBucket · 04/05/2023 22:20

Blimey I’m thinking the females need a place of safety!

LBF2020 · 04/05/2023 22:31

we have just females after the fox got our last two drakes. I can confirm that the girls try to rape/drown each other too! Springtime is one big orgy in the animal kingdom

SirVixofVixHall · 04/05/2023 22:35

I remember reading that there are more Mallard males than females. As they pair bond that means much fighting between males and lots of assault. I can’t remember what the reason was for the reduction in females though, but more of them get killed each breeding season.

ladydimitrescu · 04/05/2023 22:37

Jesus Christ, my weekend plans of going to feed the ducks as a cute little activity isn't looking great - always thought they were lovely little things and now I've read they're all a bit rapey 😩

Lasouthpaw · 04/05/2023 22:42

I excitedly pointed out the ducks to my toddler the other day, only for 3 males to attack the lone female and hold her down.

She fought them off thankfully but it was quite a spectacle, not at all the wholesome experience I was expecting.

WoolyMammoth55 · 04/05/2023 22:42

Did a canal boat holiday as a child and witnessed loads of duck gang rapes and 3 female ducks killed in the process... My mum thought it would be such an idyllic few days as a family but I really lost my innocence :( Bloody ducks!

itsmylife7 · 04/05/2023 22:46

Gosh I never had any idea about this.
I've not clicked on any links as I'm terrified to read anything else.

My duck bubble has been truly burst 😫

echt · 04/05/2023 22:58

As an antidote, here are male eiders with Kenneth Williams cooing.

https://www.facebook.com/watch/?v=768461713880364

The male eider ducks in the collection have been cooing rather noisily this week along with tossing their bills and jerking their heads 😆 It's all part... | By WWT Castle Espie Wetland Centre | Facebook

505 views, 26 likes, 7 loves, 2 comments, 6 shares, Facebook Watch Videos from WWT Castle Espie Wetland Centre: The male eider ducks in the collection have been cooing rather noisily this week along...

https://www.facebook.com/watch/?v=768461713880364

BadNomad · 04/05/2023 23:15

I remember watching a documentary about animal sex habits many years ago. There's a lot of shenanigans going on out there! There is an animal - I can't remember what it is now, some mole/mouse/fluffy rodent thing - that, when only days old, a male enters the nest and impregnates them all. Brutal stuff.

BriceNobeslovesMurielHeslop · 04/05/2023 23:19

Wow! I’ve just come back from a holiday in Majorca where I saw this exact thing over a few days. I didn’t realise it was ordinary duck mating behaviour!

Original poster

WildRosie · 04/05/2023 23:21

Apologies to those who have taken offence at this subject. It was not my intention.

OP posts:

clpsmum · 04/05/2023 23:31

I'm so glad I found this thread. I witnessed a drake chasing a female in flight quite clearly to rape her and the female was distressed and kind of duck screaming. I told no son and my dp and they both thought I'd lost the plot. I'm showing them this thread in the morning

Surplus2requirements · 04/05/2023 23:34

It's not all bad, I can attest to drakes being very nice....with frequent basting in a slow oven

evtheria · 04/05/2023 23:35

@MrsRobinsonsHandprints 🤣

alyceflowers · 04/05/2023 23:36

Two mummy ducks have been drowned by drakes on our local pond in the last couple of weeks leaving loads of little ducklings swimming around crying.

Surplus2requirements · 04/05/2023 23:41

alyceflowers · 04/05/2023 23:36

Two mummy ducks have been drowned by drakes on our local pond in the last couple of weeks leaving loads of little ducklings swimming around crying.

I've always thought it very odd, sort of a Darwin award contenter but maybe it's a twist on the survival of the fittest theory?

Only the females strong enough to avoid being drowned get to pass their genes on

Catsmere · 05/05/2023 02:13

MrsRobinsonsHandprints · 04/05/2023 21:22

...and definitely not dolphins. Evil rapey bastards.

I saw footage of a dolphin gang rape once. Still can’t forget it, it was horrifying.

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