12 month old not voluntary letting go.

[hotcrossmummie]

My 12 month old is not voluntary letting go of things or putting items into a box.

Should I be worried? He's almost walking, finds hidden objects and says two words, and points but I cannot get him to do the above.

Does anyone have any tips or words of encouragement to stop me worrying?

I’m confused, why do you want him to let things go? And put things into boxes?

Children don’t understand the concept of sharing until they’re around 4.

I don’t look at my toddler and think ‘why can’t I get her to do that’ - she’s a person and learns, develops with my encouragement and care but I don’t worry when she can’t do something I decided she should?

Im sure your little one is all within developmental norms - enjoy them ❤️

We had our 12 month review and the HV went through all the questions of what he can and can't do and this was one of them.

She's coming back in a few weeks and said we need to practise it with him. I've got myself into a pickle over it, clearly and I keep thinking he is behind in his development. Our older son was very advanced for his age and I know I shouldn't but I keep comparing 🙁

We had our 12 month review and the HV went through all the questions of what he can and can't do and this was one of them.

Those reviews are based on an average. So don't expect your child to do all of them.

With the parts that they can't do you can help them learn to do them, but as a PP indicated they learn in their own time.

He is a baby. Of course he won't let go. Heaven help trying to take something out of my one year olds fists.

Oh god thus has reminded me of ds1 12 month review. He also didn't put things into boxes. He was behind with his "problem solving skills" 🤣 its a worry at the time but ho estky, I'd forgotten about it.
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Ds1 is 7 now , and is working "in greater depth" across the board at school, working with 2 yrs above in maths. Reads for fun and can solve a rubiks cube in 22 seconds.

Please don’t let the HV worry you, OP. They can sometimes get too focused on box ticking and average this or that. Babies progress in their own sweet way, and whether they do this or that earlier or later very often means nothing at all.

My MiL once told me that her eldest, my BiL, barely uttered a word until he was 3. She had been getting very worried, but once he started, it came out in whole sentences. He’d just been taking it all in and biding his time. I might add that he later won a scholarship to Cambridge.

If everything else is good then I’d just assume that he didn’t want to give it to you and not overthink it. It’s not your first time at the rodeo so as I’m sure you know that as he gets older he will only develop more free will and get even less compliant 🤣 Maybe get him one of those shape sorter toys? Mine loved theirs and voila it’s putting objects in a box so check that one off the HV’s silly quiz.

I wouldn't worry but if you want to help improve this then just model it for him - put stuff on the floor and a box and just take stuff out and put stuff in. Do you have a tidy up song? If not you can find one on YT or spotify, play it when you're clearing up after him, soon enough he'll also want to put stuff in boxes when the song comes on. And shape sorter is a good idea as per PP.

Mine is 12m and will take out/put in all day but will definitely not willingly hand me something. The best I get is him shoving it in my mouth 😒Also mine does not point or say any words. They all get there in time!

Does he chuck his cup or food off the table or highchair? That's usually one way.

Do you mean he won’t give up whatever is in his hand if you indicate you want it? I don’t think that’s anything to worry about but try getting him to drop things that make a noise ( you do it as well, make a game of it) drop stones, plastic cups, whatever won’t break into water, throw a toy at something that’ll make a noise. I’m not surprised there’s so many stressed parents when you feel your baby has to complete a tick list every few months.

Hi @hotcrossmummie @reabies how have your little ones come on? I’m in a similar position with my DS.

@Mumof3bb1 ahh this was such a long time ago it made me smile to read it back 😊Mine is now nearly 2.5 and obsessed with trains, diggers and duplo. We had his 2yo review recently and the only areas she picked up on were not putting a coat on himself yet (well, the last 5-6 months of his life he's not needed to wear a coat so we've not been practicing that) and cutlery usage. I told her we are in the toddler eating stage where I don't care how it gets to his mouth I just want him to eat it. So again, he'll get there with time!

And contrary to my own advice above, despite having a tidy up song, it's a battle to get him to put things away at the end of the day here 😂

How is your little one getting on?

@reabies hey Ahhh that’s good to hear he’s coming on fine, so my son turned 1 on Friday and I was reading through the asq, he’s babbling but no real words, sometimes will say boo instead of moo when he sees a cow, understands if I say wgeres your ball:bubbles or if I ask him where’s my flowers he’ll look in the direction but deffo no pointing or clapping/waving, will however bang stuff together.
can find hidden objects too, can’t stack a ringer though.

can take stuff out of boxes but no chance in him
putting them back in.