F*cked up massively - work related. Perspective needed

[Stupidworkgirl]

I have an important business trip abroad tomorrow which myself and several other colleagues are going on. It is a major event in our industry and we have been planning it for a while. I have done the majority of the planning and have enjoyed it and was excited to attend. Our company director is going along with my boss and several coworkers, one of which reports to me.

I have lost my passport. I only realised this at 4pm today when packing. I am meant to fly out on an early morning flight. We have a very tidy minimalist home and have searched everywhere, it is definitely not here. I last travelled a few months ago and can only think I dropped it somewhere between security and my car.

I have called my boss who has told the MD. My boss was understanding and kind about it, I don’t know what the MDs reaction was. I’m absolutely gutted. Missing out on the event is a horrible feeling but is actually the least of it, that will wear off once it is over at the end of this week. It is more the damage to my reputation and how people might think of me going forward. I’m honestly considering leaving and finding a new job, as I don’t know how I will mentally bounce back from it.

Looking for reassurance or perhaps any similar tales or fucking up at work.

Have you checked all through your safety gear - including inside shoes / boots?

Go into a quiet room. In the dark. Clear your mind. Try and relax. Then relive the last few stages of your journey home last time you used your passport.

Think about the whole journey from the last time you used your passport to rush in home to see your DD.

I can often retrace my steps by doing this. Just imagining/remembering what I did.

If you are normally well organised and tidy/logical something happened that interrupted that process causing you to do something a bit different with your passport. You might be able to remember what that was and the different thing you did.

Did you check your laptop case ? Only because same thing happened to me for work trip and spent over hours searching the house with frantic DH annd DC and found it in my laptop case.

I think I’m still in shock over this as it doesn’t even feel quite real, sort of feel drunk in a way.
I’ll be going into the office tomorrow and have to face the rest of my colleagues who aren’t on the trip, dreading it but at least it will get it over with. I know there are worse fuck ups and this is probably quite low down in the rankings but it is definitely my worst one. It doesn’t help that I’ve only been with the company 1.5 years and worked my way up quite quickly, yet have experienced imposter syndrome and the feeling that they have misunderstood my ability somehow and will realise soon that I’m actually not that great. This moment plays into that paranoia.

Could it be at work in your desk drawer? You have to enter passport details when booking flights. Is it possible you left it there? Or maybe think back to where you was when you booked?

The travel was booked by work and they had my passport details on file, so I didn’t need to find it until today,

Side pockets in boot of car? Between seats and gearstick?
My money is on the carrier back at work?

Although could it have been stolen?

Side of the couch? My phone skipped down there. I had searched everywhere.

Have you checked your towels? That’s so oddly specific that I wouldn’t be able to dismiss it. Bathroom towels, towelling robes, under mattress protectors, etc etc

Did you pack anything last time that you didn’t end up using, and transferred directly back into a drawer e.g. a folded T-shirt? Could be inside.

It's somewhere. Look again.

You say you had your rucksack and a case, did you have a handbag or crossbody bag too? One you don't use often and just shoved it in there?

I’m in you boss’ boss position here and while I’d be a bit pissed off about a waste of company resources, I wouldn’t be writing you off for not being able to attend. Your contribution so far would absolutely be recognised and I would chalk the inability to attend a human error. I assume your lack of attendance wouldn’t negatively impact the company? No need to resign!

Would your partner have needed his passport since your last trip, and maybe taken out yours by mistake and left it anywhere?
Definitely ask St Anthony to help. Then have another look around, even places you've checked! Works for me every time.
Hope you find it 🙏🏻
And if not, there's not much you can do. There's much more serious mistakes you could make work wise, these things happen and I'm sure they will understand you're also as disappointed as they may be so you're not to blame really. Good luck 🤞🏻

Say a little prayer to St. Anthony, finder of lost things - it’s worked for me more than once!

I lost my passport once for a year and I found it in a hidden pocket of a bag. I had checked the bag and pockets lots of times but it was an extra pocket at the back that I had missed. When a friend of mine mislaid her passport I told her that story and she then found hers in a sneaky pocket!

Did you take a photocopy of it and left it in the printer? This is where DH eventually found his.

Pray to St Anthony. I'm not religious but he's helped me so many times 🥹

Deep breaths, it must be somewhere silly. Possibly inbetween a book or an old handbag?

Really hope you find it xx

@MoveOnTheCards Thank you for this. My main contribution was definitely in the planning stage and lead up to the event. Me not being there while it is live doesn’t really have any affect. So yes, you’re right, resigning isn’t necessary as I haven’t actually negatively impacted the company in any way. It is more my own shame that I’m unsure I’ll be able to deal with.

Oh dear, what a nightmare

but this so isn’t a fuck up, it really isn’t.

you asked for perspective - at least it didn’t happen when you were going on holiday! That would be worse.

as for your male colleagues - they probably would lose their passports too without wives to look after them ;) and as for the ones still in the office just say “something came up” if they ask why you didn’t go.

certainly not worth leaving your job over

Would you think any less of a colleague or direct report if they were in your shoes? Or would you have a fleeting thought about it and then move on with your life? This can, and will, happen to absolutely anyone. You'll laugh about it in years to come, I assure you.

How old is your child and have you asked them? We searched and searched for car keys once at 5am when my husband was supposed to be leaving for a work trip. At 7 when my then 5 yr old woke up i asked if she'd seen then and she looked shifty. She'd hidden them so he couldn't go but did then go and get them!

I did something similar and found mine under the spare tyre in the boot of the car! Worth a try.

Have you searched your car thoroughly? Glove compartment, under all the seats etc? Everyone makes mistakes. Don’t worry about it.

@Rosecoffeecup I did try reversing this and imagining it was someone else, and I would probably have rolled my eyes and thought about how daft they were then forgotten about it. I’m quite a forgiving and sympathetic person though, and I’m not sure if my bosses are or not - I suppose I’ll find out in the coming weeks.

@sunflowerdaisyrose I did ask DD, she’s 5. I showed her DH passport so she would know what I meant and she looked genuinely confused and didn’t have any idea. The thing is, if she did take it, it could have been a few months ago and she probably would have forgotten by now.

Someone's totally bonkers hunch is hardly a "lead"!

So so so feel for you ... crossing my fingers and hoping your passport is at work so at least you can catch a later flight...

No idea if this is helpful, but I did this once and then found it in the pocket of a jacket in my wardrobe that I swore blind I hadn't taken on that trip....