Does anyone else find it hard to accept help?

[Creditcrunch2243]

I’m going through a tough time at the moment but I am struggling to accept help that is being offered. My son is quite poorly in and out of hospital, I have an older child and a baby too. I am finding it so hard to juggle everything but then I hear myself say no thanks when someone offers to help me.

I have had to fend for myself for a long time. My mom died when I was vey young, I learned to cook when I was 6, used to pick my little brother up from school and get us both home on the bus when I was 8 etc. I moved out when I was 17 and have always been very independent, I’ve had no choice.

Maybe I’m scared of admitting I can’t do something? I think I feel sad that my mom isn’t here to help me too. If I’m being completely honest there’s a little bit of people not living up to my ‘standards’ (like how I do the washing up etc daft things like that).

Does anyone else find it hard to accept help when it’s offered?

I'm the same. Im very self-sufficient and sometimes I wish that I wasn't. Accepting help almost seems like an admission of failure. My logical brain knows that it isn't, and I'm always offering to help others and don't think badly of them if they accept, but I find accepting help very, very difficult. Even worse is asking for help when I need it, in my case that's almost impossible. I think mine also comes from my childhood.

Hi @Creditcrunch2243 yes me too x
To the point i wouldn't even get a lift from someone (i didn't have a car for years).
Now i have a baby, i do take up the offer of help, i had to give in because i was just becoming a tired wreck 😖

Maybe I’m scared of admitting I can’t do something? I think I feel sad that my mom isn’t here to help me too. If I’m being completely honest there’s a little bit of people not living up to my ‘standards’ (like how I do the washing up etc daft things like that).

Can you perhaps reframe these thoughts? People like helping. It validates their sense of being a good, valued person. Recognise that by letting people help you give them pleasure. You grant them something, you're not just the receiver, but also the giver.