About 18 months ago I got my dream job. Loved it. Got promoted within a year to a senior role, similar to the original role but with additional responsibilities. Loved it.
Then I applied for a managerial role. Managing people in my original role in essence. I didn't think I would get it, it was a long term career aspiration but I have never managed before and felt I needed more experience, but my manager convinced me to go for it so I did and I got the job.
I hate it. I was chucked in right at the deep end, have some team members who are underperforming and nothing was done previously so has been left to me to address. I have no time to do anything. There are meetings all the time and half the time I have no idea what is going on. I feel like I'm winging it constantly. I have great support from my colleagues but have had no formal training. Some of my team are fantastic and easy to manage but some are constantly taking the piss, argumentative etc.
I'm constantly stressed, don't sleep and feel I have made a massive mistake. I work full time with 2 young children and this is affecting my time with them. I feel like my life is spiralling out of control.
The role was a 12 month secondment so my previous role is still there waiting for me, but it is pretty well known that no one returns from secondment. I am very likely to be offered permanent as my predecessor is unlikely to return.
Sorry this is just a massive rant, but does anyone have any advice? Should I suck it up and hope it gets better? (This is what people irl are telling me to do) or throw the towel in and ask to step down which would basically kill my career dead.