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Really scared for my husband

21 replies

Lemonadie · 29/04/2023 16:52

My husband took over as manager of a business and inherited the staff that were there as such. One of them he has had repeated problems with, is clearly an alcoholic and has a really nasty temper. He's started on staff members before and my husband has wanted rid of him but didn't want to rock the boat too much in the early days. He has taken a dislike to my husband and has always been rude to him, he seems to have a problem with authority and just can't bare being managed by anyone, pushes back on everything. He has been getting worse and worse, he came into work drunk a few days ago and my husband told him to leave, the staff member got in his face and started calling him a cunt and saying he was going to kill him. He left and my husband terminated his employment and he was told not to come back. He did come back today and was mouthing off that he was going to kick his head in. My husband locked the doors and the now ex staff member was stood outside shouting abuse through the windows and saying come outside I dare you. He lives locally to both the business and our house and I just feel sick that he's going to attack my husband. All it can take is one punch and people can die, I know that probably sounds dramatic but it's just really scaring me. My husband isn't one for confrontation and is really taken aback by it all and upset himself. He knows what me and the kids look like too and I just worry he'll do something and I feel so unnerved. I want to report it all to the police but my husband worries it'll escalate things further? Sad

OP posts:
ArcaneWireless · 29/04/2023 16:57

I think matters have escalated enough….

coretext · 29/04/2023 16:59

Police. Now

SchoolTripDrama · 29/04/2023 17:02

What needs to happen before you'll involve the police?? If anything does happen (god forbid) the police will question you both on why you didn't report to them earlier.

Also, ultimately if it gets to court, you not having reported it soon enough could potentially mean less evidence against him as well, as the police have less documented behaviours to use against him

tailinthejam · 29/04/2023 17:02

This is a job for the police, surely?

Does your DH have cctv on the premises? If not, it might be worth finding out if any properties nearby have footage of the incident on theirs.

Lemonadie · 29/04/2023 17:03

Thank you I did think so but he's been so adamant that if he goes to the police the guy will really have it in for him but at this point he already does doesn't he. Yes we have cctv of what happened on a couple of occasions so we have proof of everything

OP posts:
DancingWithTheMoonlitKnight · 29/04/2023 17:04

Your husband should have called the police when the ex employee was kicking off outside his work.

SchoolTripDrama · 29/04/2023 17:04

Lemonadie · 29/04/2023 17:03

Thank you I did think so but he's been so adamant that if he goes to the police the guy will really have it in for him but at this point he already does doesn't he. Yes we have cctv of what happened on a couple of occasions so we have proof of everything

Tell your husband that the only way this could escalate any further is with actual violence. Everything before violence has already happened, hasn't it??

Muchtoomuchtodo · 29/04/2023 17:08

The police need to be informed of this, and I’d get a marker put on your house now so that if you do have to call them about a disturbance at home they will have the heads up.

Gazelda · 29/04/2023 17:29

@SchoolTripDrama's post makes a lot of sense. Think about it logically. Escalation = violence.

Hellocatshome · 29/04/2023 17:32

This is what the police are there for. The man is unhinged already contacting the police cant make it much worse.

ApolloandDaphne · 29/04/2023 17:32

He definitely needs to call the police. That is the only way he can keep himself and his other staff safe.

AgrathaChristie · 29/04/2023 17:34

Of course you call the police. It would be sheer stupidity to allow this man to escalate his behaviour.

Itsanotherhreatday · 29/04/2023 17:34

Police will also sign post this man for help in his addictions.

Sirius3030 · 29/04/2023 17:50

This is why we have police.

Unicorntastic · 29/04/2023 18:10

You need to report It to police but also make sure your husband has terminated his employment correctly (even though he is justified)

write everything down he can remember and witnesses /cctv etc

InSpainTheRain · 29/04/2023 18:11

Report this to the police and log everything that happens with them. I don't want to scare you but I'd review security at home and work.

hairdresserbreakup · 29/04/2023 18:16

Absolutely agree with PP - this is a matter for the police.

Thesharkradar · 29/04/2023 18:17

hopefully as an out of control alcoholic the most damage will be done to himself, completely understand why you feel scared but do you know much about this man, does he have much in the way of 'back-up'.
As said it would be best to report to the police.

Aylestone · 29/04/2023 18:19

ApolloandDaphne · 29/04/2023 17:32

He definitely needs to call the police. That is the only way he can keep himself and his other staff safe.

I was going to say this. Were there other staff in the building? Your husband has a duty of care to keep them safe. He should have phoned the police, not locked his staff in and hoped he’d go away without attacking anyone!

TonTonMacoute · 29/04/2023 18:27

This is why we have the police

You would think so, wouldn't you?

I would call them but don't be surprised if they do fuck all and don't give a flying fuck. This is what they did with us when DH was assaulted outside our house, we had video footage and a witness.

Useless, no wonder confidence in the police is at an all time low.

Lemonadie · 29/04/2023 23:22

We've logged it with the police. Thank you for advice. Bloody hope this is the end of it..

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