Help! On my own with 5 children and disabled elderly person and i think one of them has a chest infection

[9peoplecalling]

My husband has gone abroad for work so i am on my own with 5 children and my bed bound grandmother who lives with us and i care for.

my grandmother was in hospital 3 weeks ago with pneumonia, a week later my 7 year old had antibiotics for a chest infection but tbh they were both not too bad and i thought it was over.

my 12 year old (who for extra fun is autistic😁) has started seeming off today and i have just had a little listen to her chest with my ear and it sounds like a pop then a creaky door sound when she breathes.

She isnt struggling to breathe, no temp etc although she has said a few times today her back is “gone” i have asked her if that means pain but she cant seem to communicate that with me.

I am thinking i need to message the gp tomorrow but its going to be a mission to get there between kids and finding someone to stay with grandmother ( she cant be alone)

does anyone know what a pop and a creaky door sound mean? Does this need antibiotics if she has no temp? Or could it safely be left a day or two?

Not a doctor but def sounds like she needs to be seen and checked. Would it be possible to get a call out doctor? It is where I live if you need it or can’t get to a doctor. It sounds like you have a lot going on and it might help you if you could. We are not uk though so no idea what facilities you have in your area!

Her chest needs to be listened to by a doctor or a nurse. Could you get a home visit? They're not easy to come by but if you explain the position they ought to help you with one.

Is she your dd or dm mother? Is there no one else in the family who could come and look after her while you do what you need to do?

Children are usually pretty portable, and lack of transport is not an indication for an NHS home visit. I'd be astonished if an NHS GP agrees to do a home visit for a 12-year-old. You may find that your GP can do a phone or video assessment; actually listening to the chest rarely changes the management plan. You can normally tell if somebody is sick enough to need antibiotics from the history and how unwell they are overall.

It's really not feasible for you to be solely responsible for five children and your elderly relative, for this very reason.

With the greatest respect no one here can tell you if you DC is ok or not. Imagine if someone says they are and actually they are not? Or someone says rush to a and e and actually there's not really anything wrong?

It's not fair on any of you to have no resilience or back up.

I'd get her seen. The creaky sound might be due to congestion in her airways.

Send thex12 year ood with a neighbour or friend to gp
How are you getting them to school

Do you not have any friends/family that could sit with everyone whilst you take the 12 year old to see a doc?

Does your gp have the online contact messaging thing? If so message now asking for a house visit. Follow up with a call

next time gran is in hospital it sounds harsh, but refuse to take her home. It really isn’t possible for you to be put in this situation. In the meantime contact Adult social services ans start the ball rolling either for carers to come or for her to be moved to a home.

The current set up will have ramifications on your mental health.